infected and waiting for death

for me life is a game for me i believe god sent me to the earth, an epolepsy infected teenager, to have a f*cked up life and see what i do liveing with weed smoking parents, s*it grades and no friends. when its over i go to bed crying and shaking. there is no god for me. i believe if i die i get to be some 1 else. id like this because i can get out of this s*it life and be happy.