Well its official im the biggest loser in Houston! In a matter of 3days ive lost everything I love in this world! I lost my job, my gf and my son bc I couldnt find a stable living arrangement! And not bc I couldn’t afford it but bc of my record! So after blowing money for a cpl mos on hotels my family got fed up and left me alone, broke, homeless and miserable! Im so heartbroken right now! The pain I feel inside is unbearable! Im so worthless! How pathetic must I be to not be able to house my family! This has shown […]
Category:
My Suicide Note
Hello, I am new here.. I’m really not too sure if anyone will see this but it is my only shot.
Since I was younger, I haven’t really had any friends. I have always tried to sit next to a group of people, but I have never fit. I seem off hanging with other people. I try to seem not lonely, but it doesn’t work. I have been bullied for 5 years, by people I have never spoken to, i really wish i was intelligent as the other people at my school, but i’m not.
a lot of people talk behind my back, and I’m really not […]
Yup. Totally fucked up since the fucking day I was born. So this past 2 years have been so so messed up, wait that’s not the right word. HAVE BEEN SO FUCKED UP!! Last monday was my 3rd time I tried to commit suicide, didn’t work as you can see, so I’ve been at this shitty hospital all this week and a couple hours before doctors told me I have cancer (leukemia). Not the best news I wanted but ammm I can’t do anything about it, because I did this all bymyself so right now I;m lost, and please don’t. Don’t tell me everything is […]
I’m 14 years old and I’ve been thinking about overdosing on sleeping pills. I’ve done research on strong medications but I can’t seem to find any that are strong enough from over the counter products, it seems I have have a prescription from a doctor. I can’t do that without telling my parents and I dont think I can do that without bursting into tears and have them become angry with me. Just this morning I finally told them I didn’t believe in god and I felt they were about to disown me. I know this is probably a page to help others come out […]
I’ve been well aware of my anxiety and depression for a while now (5 years). I am 20. I go through phases of suicidal thoughts. I’m mostly fine, but sometimes it all becomes too much and I want to die. I’ll google the painless way to kill yourself.
Last summer I started dating a guy. He is wonderful and kind and sweet and caring. He is who you dream of meeting. But. There’s always a but. I think we fell in love too soon, too fast. Because now, 8 months later, I don’t know what I want. I don’t know if I love him. But I […]
Now I’m staring at the moon wondering why the bottom fell out , I’ve been searching for answers and there’s questions I’ve found. I’m feeling sad and alone.. again. And i’m losing control, i’m not ready to drown. I feel like I’m just too fucking bruise to keep fighting. I wrote this letter to my family saying ”I’m calm and feeling warm”.
And this bad feeling is coming for me, my eyes have been closed to the world. I can’t do it again. I need to be strong but I just I can’t.. I’m crying all alone in this empty room..again FUCK I hate this, fucking tired […]
fuck reality , fuck real life , fuck real world , because reality / real-world / real-life is boring ! Imagination /dreams / fantasy is better than reality / real-world / real-life !
by niki
written by niki
I think (some) people would agree that our everyday’s reality / real life / real world life is boring, mundane, repetitive routines, jobs, to make money, and even the ‘fun’ stuff like party, sex, dance, etc in the end still can’t beat our wildest dreams / imagination / fantasy .
Movies , video games , comics , books , novels , anime , manga often are a HUNDRED times much more interesting than this mundane, dull, LIMITED / LIMITING, boring reality / boring reallife / boring realworld !
eg: Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Avatar, X-Men, Marvel heroes / comics , Star Wars, Star Trek, […]
Ever since I was 13 I had sucicidel thoughts, I would cut almot daily, I was pretty much on my own and I would barley say a word, I’ve also atempted suicide but by destiny’s hand I still alive. I saw this as a sign, that maybe things in my life would get better, all the wrong would turn right and the darkness in me would fade. My depression and anxity where disapearing my problems didn’t seem so big any more. I’m 19 now and I feel as if nothing has changed, I feel that I was lieing to myself. My dad would take his frustration […]
Hello, I’m a 20 year old guy currently living at home with his parents, going to school. I don’t have a lot of friends, and I’ve never been social.
But recently I’ve been getting closer and closer to suicide. I’m nearly failing school (again) and I’m one quarter away from getting kicked out of both my parent’s house and my school. Currently, my computer and my favorite TV show’s upcoming fifth season are the only things keeping me alive. But is it truly worth the pain? Just to watch some silly animated show’s fifth season, in return to months of endless suffering.
I have severe ADHD and […]
I’m so sorry mom, I betrayed you numerous times. But this time, I am deeply sorry. Besides all the medicine, I really don’t know why I’m so fucked up .. I lied about that vape pen . It is mine . I lied about the wine. I did drink it all . Do I regret it ? YES . Would I take it all back ? YES . Sometimes I think of why I’m still living . You yell at me and tell me to pack my things and move to my dads . Well you know I wont . You know I hate my […]
Virtual Reality is escape from boring reality sucks , Virtual Reality is escape from boring real world sucks , Virtual Reality is escape from boring real life suck !
by niki
written by niki
Virtual Reality is escape from boring reality suck ,
Virtual Reality is escape from boring real world suck ,
Virtual Reality is escape from boring real life sucks !
We all know that this Reality / Real-world / Real-life is very LIMITED / LIMITING !
everyday we do the same routines , chores , go make money , make money / profits , go to boring shitty jobs because of money , and then we go have fun, party, sex, entertainment etc etc , and then it repeats again !
What’s so interesting about that ??
I’ve observed that most people who actually LOVE all those […]
I was encouraged by impefertluck to write tonight.
There are so many people hurting and so much pain. Know you can get through your personal struggle and hurts. It can often seem like you can’t. Feelings lie. Maybe that sounds pretentious. Feelings lead us to conclude things we never would have if the feelings hadn’t been so strong.
I have dealt with my depression for over 20 years. I had counseling but no one listened to me when I talked about the pain of my family life so many years before. So, instead of understanding that the depression came from a situation I had no control over, […]
I sit here looking out my window wishing a stray bullet would just come through and end it all.
Other times i sit and see the Semi trucks pass by. wondering and knowing it could end if I would just step right out in front of it.
Another night of self hatred. No way to get out, No way to make anything better.
Maybe for once Something will answer my pleads and just finish me off.
I wouldnt care if i died in a brutal way. Just want it to end.
No strength to fight, NO strength to end it myself. NO power to get by.
I am a ghost who […]
I don’t know if anybody is going to read this, I don’t know how this works, but I hope it helps me…
I’ve been having a lot of problems at home, with my dad being mad at my mom and I, barely acknowledging that we live there too. There is just too much tension and I just can not take it anymore. So I decided to give my father a reality check, something that will show him the consequences of his actions. He either changes for good (I hope), or I’ll learn he never loved me.
I decided to sacrifice my life.
I hope my decision doesn’t sound selfish, […]
I can’t anymore. I physically can’t. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I can’t be of use to anyone. I can’t keep my hands from shaking. I can’t keep my breathing even. I can’t stop myself from cutting my body up. I can’t love. I can’t cry. I can’t keep this up anymore. I can’t seem to care. But the biggest can’t I have in my life is how I can’t seem to kill myself just yet. What am I waiting for? Can’t. Can’t. Can’t. That’s all I seem to think in terms of. Was. I want to be was. I was struggling. I was suicidal. […]
i tried and failed I guess I didn’t have enough ********. I got to see my daughters for 45 min they hugged me non stop and told me they loved me so much.
I will try again tonight and every night till I get this right I don’t want to hurt anymore and I don’t want my kids to cry anymore. I pray that God will take me and save someone else, it just needs to end. Why can’t God see I am done he is suppose to have mercy, maybe I am so worthless even God himself doesn’t want me!
Not only is this a great song, but I’d imagine that these lyrics can be interpreted by everyone here on a much deeper level than even intended.
B
I need help on a painless way to exit , please don’t lecture me… things have gotten so bad that I know things won’t improve and it would be better this way
I’ve fought my depression alone for eight years. It was a struggle I was losing most of the time. My depression is a black cloud that covers me and strangles and poisons everything in my life. My depression has defined everything about me as a person, a few of these things being my motivation, self-confidence and social life. I hate the person I see in the mirror with such intensity it scares me. I would numb myself from the world by seeking out any distractions I can find, be it books or video games (with diminishing results, I can’t pick up a book anymore and I […]
I don’t think I’ve ever done this before. I can say right now this is going to be a really long post because I’m pouring myself and my twisted emotions into this. I don’t expect anyone to read this fully. Or even at all. I’m not writing this expecting I’ll get help on here. I’m doing it for myself because maybe if I put my thoughts in words it will help me in getting through this confusion, even though I detest writing.
I am a 20 year old female. Right now I’m living in the city away from home. Right now I don’t have a job […]