Now I’m staring at the moon wondering why the bottom fell out , I’ve been searching for answers and there’s questions I’ve found. I’m feeling sad and alone.. again. And i’m losing control, i’m not ready to drown. I feel like I’m just too fucking bruise to keep fighting. I wrote this letter to my family saying ”I’m calm and feeling warm”.
And this bad feeling is coming for me, my eyes have been closed to the world. I can’t do it again. I need to be strong but I just I can’t.. I’m crying all alone in this empty room..again FUCK I hate this, fucking tired of this bullshit, I don’t want to be save anymore.
Please someone help me out, I don’t want to feel this pain, I don’t know what to feel, don’t know where to go anymore.. I overthink this too much. I’m done.
6 comments
i dont know if its your post or the song im listening to but i feel for you… i feel your pain… that isolation that comes with emoting all by yourself with only the walls to hear your cries…. fuck, sometimes its too much… dont cry little one.. your moon will be full once more. your moon will be new once more. song is “whats a clock without the batteries?” by Emarosa
I’m sorry that you are in so much pain but you aren’t alone…your lines are so poetic and depict beautifully feelings that I can relate to.
hey there kitten! when are you getting out of the hospital?
what are they giving you, meds i mean, cause either you’re quite the fighter or they need to up the dose-
have you been offered any counseling yet? maybe you need to vent, kinda like here but physically vent- yell, punch a pillow- tell the nurses or doctors though that you need this or they’ll sedate you
I don’t know! My grandma came visit me she told me she didn’t know anything about my mom and without her I can’t get out of here..
I’m not getting any kind of meds. I’m just here by myself hahah.. feeling like crap because the doctors told me they can’t help me anymore because my mom need to pay the med insurance.. so idk what to do
that is so messed up! i think you’re mom could seriously get in trouble if she doesn’t show soon. i was about your age when i got in trouble with the cops but i guess they felt sorry for me or whatever cause they took me home and told my mom she needed to sign some release papers and she refused- she told them she was done with my shit and to haul my ass to jail! ooh, girl, the cop got in my moms face, he was so mad at her, he said they would charge her with child neglect if she didn’t sign, Ha! she had too, of course she kicked me out as soon as they left, but the point is if you need to be discharged but they can’t locate your mom, she might have the same consequence-
maybe if you keep bugging your g-ma she’ll work harder towards helping get you out-
I feel so fucked up.. idk what to do oh my god I can’t live like this anymore