For your poems.
It’s that time of year, the days are getting shorter, the nights are getting colder, the leaves are changing color. How fortunate to have eyes to see the show.
why come in my room to talk to me?
only to put me down
to make me feel like im not good enough
i do everything right
you don’t have to make me feel shitty because you hate the way you grew up
you tell me im lucky for how nice you are to me
you also tell me that im a failure because i stay up late doing the homework i can barely do
im not doing this for you
so why critique me on the essence of my work when its not for you
it does not concern you
the reason im so […]
Is there someone in white on the second floor of an apartment with some “non – taxed green trees (grass or weed, nice ones…) and she is in the next room running out of food and just lying there a little scared face down on here matress (and there is a key ring she must bring with her — but you my friend must find that after lifting her from the room (a female saver around about 70kilos approximately 130 pounds — nice boobies… and then goes up to the bathrrom on the left and get the keyring with her left hand and keeps it […]
there’s two sides to the battle going on inside my head
one side is the innocent little girl who got robbed of her childhood, handing me a match, trying to light my way through the darkness
and the other side is the girl who’s demons are taking over, using the match to light a cigarette and screaming at me to mark my skin one. more. time.
i could always use another blistering reminder of what happened that day
The world tells us so many things, feeds us plenty of lies, and way too much bullshit.
I’m so sick of being sexualized for wearing a plain shirt with bra straps underneath. God forbid, I’m a woman, and GOD FORBID I wear a bra.
I’m tired of being catcalled on the sidewalk while walking home from the library by 30 year old white men yelling “nice tits” out the car window. I’m sixteen you creeps. Catcalling, is trying to humiliate you, reinforce their own dominance over you; it’s a way of trying to say, “hey, I’m able to tear you down and say what I want about […]
i think sadness is so complex.
when i say i’m sad, what i really mean is
black abyss inside me filled with cigarette ashes, smashed bottles, bloody skin, empty screams and words i can’t say.
i’m a confused and lost soul living in a self-destructive and cold body.
since that one event in my life i’ve forced myself to be a cold-hearted and mean-spirited person because i though it was better that way.
destroy relationships before they destroy you
leave before you get left
i’ve burned enough bridges it’s insane i haven’t drowned yet.
everyone uses the phrase ‘fake it till you make it’ for thinks like confidence and happiness,
but that little girl in me used it to become an emotionless void
and now i don’t know how to turn back.
i don’t even know if i can.
Previously, I went to visit family in California for the summer. I was in a pretty bad place mentally, so I used the money I had saved up to go surfing all summer long.
And for the first time, in a long time, I was happy.
Not just happy on the waves, but at home too. It’s like the board was an extension of my body, and I was free to be me when I went out.
No homework, no stress, no group chats, no toxic friends, no mom, no dad, no yelling, no crying, just me, and the board.
Just me, surfing. […]
I was so angry.
no, that’s an understatement; I was livid.
The problem?
my mom said we were out of butter for the toast I was making.
I got so pissed because we ran out of butter. BUTTER. I don’t understand why the littlest and stupidest things are starting to set me off, but i’m worried i’m going to snap at the people I care about.
Why does this happen?
I just don’t get it.
Masking heavy thoughts
Like dirt covering a dead seed
Giving life to unclean intentions
And sprouting the darkest deeds
Song lyrics?:
The things I’ve tried and heard
Looking for better words 2x
Idk I’m just trying to get rid of the loud thoughts and go tf to sleep
She overcame sadness by sharing her gift. Listen to my dear friend at soundcloud.com/ samanthasings ~ may you be renewed and find comfort and joy in this life
I remember December, a season that I shall not long forget. A time when its resplendent blanket of white enswathed the earth and concealed from all the life it was known to harbor. I suppose that it is fitting that during the season when Persephone was stolen away from Demeter to the land of the dead that so too should another soul be spirited from this world to the realm of hades, and along with it my innocence.
Life offers many different paths for us to traverse some linear and others consisting of many different twists and turns, and yet it is impossible within the moment […]
I don’t want to live, but I don’t want to die. Sometimes I picture myself running away from my life. All my responsibilites, from school, from home and all my friends. I wish I was invisible, i wish people wouldnt acknowledge me. I want to be here without actually having to be here. I want to live in a dream where I never have to wake up. Can anyone save me from this madness?
Tragedy is in the morning hours when we awake. Tragedy is when we realise that our long aspirations were worlds away from what fate granted us: dysmal cognitive processing, genetic disorders, mood disorders. I suppose let us brew a soup from bad luck… Don’t you think? Let’s call it ‘destiny’s pot of spoiled goods’.
Charles Bukowski famously stated ‘I can make a cup of coffee, or kill myself’. And then, apart from the nihilism trap, there is the gossamer memories of our youth. Oh, how we truly belonged. Lest we forget the bicycle rides to Gran’s flat only a couple of blocks away. The joy of […]
Slowly spiraling down this hole,
Drinking enough to make me feel whole.
Different men everyother week
Drinking enough to make my liver weak.
I don’t know what I’m doing, I’m just letting life pass me by,
I don’t know if I’ll find love, he’s just a love for the night.
I know it’s not right, but tonight I’ll get ready again
Take another shot, my nights about to begin.
Tear soaked whiskey they keep on flowing, I wish they would just stop.
Taste my broken heart with every single drop.
Cause I’m spiraling doowwnnn
this rabbit hole called life
im nearly eighteen. i have less than a month
how. how and why?
why do i have to become an adult when i didn’t get to be a child?
i want those 9 years back. give them back.
give it back. i want my innocence back. why did they steal it?
why did they take so much from me?
i don’t want this. i don’t.
where did the time go
where
******!!!! ******, ******, ******!!! it’s summer once again, ******!!!!
do you remember last august, ******???? last september??? nOVembEr????? hoOW ABOUT OCTOBER, ******???
DO YOU REMEMBER, ******?
DO YOU???
DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU DID LAST AUGUST???? LAST SEPTEMBER??? NOVEMBER? HOW ABOUT OCTOBER, ******????
ARE YOU GOING TO FIND ME AGAIN, ****** ??
ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE ME BLEED AGAIN???? ARE YOU?
ARE YOU GOING TO TRAP ME AGAIN?? CUT ME OPEN?? ARE YOU GOING TO, ******???
YOUR HANdS Are SO CoLD, ******.
iLOVEYOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU
i am ruined. i am disgusting. i am used. i am repulsive. i am unclean. i am filthy. i am tainted.
disgusting.
the memory of what you did to me makes me feel disgusting
you ruined me
im filthy
i will never be clean