For your poems.
One day, I realized he might not exist. My soulmate, I mean.
I realized there might not be someone walking around this earth just waiting to meet me. Someone with a private world just as intricate as mine that, one day, I would get to share and be a part of and know.
And I realized I was keeping a vacant spot in my heart for this person who might not exist. That I wasn’t allowing myself to be whole because how could I be whole with my other half missing?
Hi, im Bunny and i like to meet new people, would you guys be my friends? ah, nice to know.
Well, about me? I like to act, to sing, i love going to the gym ! Friends? I dont know… looks like im a popular boy, everyone wants to go bed with me… ops, bed? i meant everyone cares for me. Oh quite the hypocrisy, no one cares to anyone, they just wanna bed you, you’re a mere toll, was I? Oh yeah… rape me please, as you do again and again.
Oh Isaque, your skin seems so pretty, can I touch it? Sure you can milady.
Which moisturizer […]
Death surrounds me
with peaceful quiet.
Death opens it’s arms to me
in it’s dark embrace
I can feel my soul becoming undone.
Death walks beside me
Tempting me to come to him
with promise of forever
He tells me
I can qwiet your thoughts
for all eternity,
I can take the suffering away
And give you release.
I can stop the endless path of despair
which you walk upon
To feel nothing
To be quiet
To be Peacful
Theses are what i have wanted […]
1 became 2, then 2 to 4. 1 cut every time my heart fell to the floor.
4 became 5, then 5 to 8. 1 cut every time I’ve experienced self-hate.
8 became 9, then 9 to 11. 1 cut every time I wish I was in Heaven.
11 became 12, then 12 to 16. 1 cut every time they were ever mean.
16 became 17, then 17 to 21. 1 last cut before my life was done.
1 cut, 2 cut, 3 cut, 4.
Loss of blood, my mind began to flood, as my life went on no more.
Self-Harm is like a drug […]
Even that you never stayed away from me, there was always the fear that you commit fraud to my love. And now I realize that my heart deserves an explanation. I do not regret doubting, questioning your loyalty and even the way you look. And now the bitter future is me, I’ll be always there; cause well, I do not want to miss you.
This website isn’t helping. I’m at my lowest, I need help, yet no one helps. Thanks.
Why do you play with my emotions?
You actually asked me how I felt.
You already have someone so why do you want me?
I felt something new with you today that actually gave me hope.
You’re such an asshole.
Why do I miss you so much when we’re apart?
Do you miss me?
They treat you like crap in the real life, yet they act like they care on the internet. Why is this? Why do they stab you in the back to your face. They don’t see the cuts, they think I’m fine, they think it doesn’t hurt, they also believe I do not cut from excuses. No one thinks I’m a good liar, they don’t know how good of a liar I really am. I hide my cuts they don’t suspect. I plot to leave, but my uncle keeps me here by making me show a true smile. When he helps me they hurt him, I […]
Reality is boring & LIMITED !!
Real life is boring & LIMITED !!
Real world is boring & LIMITED !!
I also hate this life, I hate people / humans (well.. MOST/90% of them), I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING !! and especially nowadays become ONLY very materialistic, money / profits driven only, all about money, money, money, & image, image, image! ; it’s very superficial, shallow, and mundane boring!
Why movies, video games, comics, books, novels, anime/manga, creative Art, basically human’s IMAGINATION & fantasy is often/always a hundred times FAR much more interesting & better than this sad, mundane, boring, superficial, […]
fuck Reality ! fuck real life ! fuck real world !
Reality sucks ! Real world sucks ! Real life sucks !
Reality boring ! Real life boring ! Real world boring !
movies, novels, comics, games, manga/anime are better than Reality !!
there is no MAGIC, no SUPERPOWER , no ‘cool, magical’ SUPERHERO / SUPERHEROES like in those movie , novel , comics , game / games , manga / anime , etc etc !
FUCKING BORING real world / real life / reality !!!
I also hate this life, I hate people / humans, I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING […]
The tip of the blade touches my skin
My body shrieks for me to stop
But with my heart aching so
My mind tells me to carry on
I push the blade hard against my frail skin
The tears fall delicately like the melancholy of rain droplets
Yet as I pull the stainless steel up my arm
My emotions are gone, I just feel numb
I ardour watching as my skin torn asunder
Almost […]
Things are hectic. I have no control anymore. The more I tried to be normal the further away I was. I participated in “normal” activities. Yet I would always end up in the same place.
Crying my eyes out.
Alone.
In the closet.
Blade in my right hand.
Twiddling between my pointer and thumb.
Waiting for relief.
Asking whoever is listening, ‘why’.
Convincing myself not to do it.
Never believing.
Why can’t I be like all the reindeer in the reindeer games?
Red.
All of us have so much in common. It’s both amazing and heartbreaking. Imagine all of us getting together and just chatting. Being face to face with the people who are really there for you.
There must be some alternate universe where all of us are happy, truly happy. No longer faking it, no more suffering, just happiness.
What a childlike dream.
We all may feel alone but we’re alone together. Even if it’s not face to face. The first day I posted on here, I was in a very dark place. More specifically, I was standing on a bridge looking down at the water. Wondering. What would […]
“Not Falling”
by Mudvayne
Always, known in, all my time,
A little left of center now
Reflect as I realize,
That all I need is to find the middle pillar path to sit like the sun by a star in the sky and
just be.
Sinners, casting stones at me
I… I stand, not crawling, not falling down
I… I bleed the demons that drag me down
I… I stand, (for nothing), not crawling, (the center), not falling down (of calms within the eye)
I… I’ll bleed, (for no one), The demons, (but myself), that pull me down (for me and no one else)
Goodbye, sunshine, I’ve put […]
The goals achieved.
The hopes desired.
Last goodbyes.
New starts.
Eyes are tired.
Soon they wont remember me,
Soon words will be rarely exchanged.
Soon they will have a family with children with exotic names.
Soon ill be a memory to them, soon I will not even cross their mind.
It will all take place over time
I feel so alone, and each time I wish to scream “Don’t Go”.
But they will leave me even though i love them to the pit of my soul.
I know how it works, it happens each time.
But it just makes me want to desperately rewind.
I know how it works, it happens every time.
Even though i wish to rewind.
rewind.
rewind.
rewind.
I know […]
Is it sad that the only reason I’m still living is for my pets?
Is it sad that I steal my mothers pain medication?
Is it sad that I sleep with a football player who I have no feelings for?
Is it sad that whenever people ask me if I’m okay I avoid the question?
Is it sad that every day I dream about ending my life?
Is it sad that the only response I give people is “I don’t care”?
Is it sad that I’ve drawn everyone away?
Is it sad that my father doesn’t even know how to spell my name?
Is it sad that I’m so desperate for help that […]
The weight on your chest never ends.
He is the beginning,
He is the weight,
Physically crushing,
The pain follows,
Heavier than he was.
The black hole in your chest,
Ripping your insides apart.
The cuts are the closer,
The release and the cause simultaneously,
The blood runs,
You get one true breath in,
The weight returns
You know its not the end,
Tomorrow he will be there.
He will find you.
The weight will never end
It’s here again, and I need a friend.
Times are tough, this life is rough.
Darkness here, nothing is clear.
Live on I will, despite this life.
Hope is gone, though I carry on.
Despite depression, I’ve learned a lesson.
This too shall pass, it will not get me.
There’s a fight in us, few will see.
Even on life’s darkest paths,
The light of hope will come and find us at last.
Depression is a swirling river, hope is a rickety bridge.
One small nail holds it in place.
We will wipe these tears off our face,
Let’s take this bridge together and find our happy place.
The sun will shine, I will go on.
Someday I truly hope […]
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