Email:kenzie.fallenangel33@gmail.com feel free to email me because I will listen and try to help. I promise. No judgement here.

i just want to disappear.

Even though I’ve had my reasons, I still don’t know why I’ve felt so unhappy all of this time, why I’ve never been a friend to myself.

I am a huge disappointment to my past and present self, and my dysfunctional-but-loving family…

In retrospect, despite my flaws, I was pretty cool as a kid, I think. I should’ve given myself a chance…

I am in my mid 20s.

I don’t have my driver’s license yet.

I have little to no work experience or college education.

I have absolutely no friends, not even acquaintances. I hung around a few of my classmates during my younger years, but they were more like acquaintances […]

I feel like slitting every visible area of skin open just to watch the blood pour out and hope that I bleed out. Leave everyone with a better life. Get out of this place, I just…I can’t.

Have any of you ever wondered if you know someone on this site, but don’t know it’s them? Some random person with a made up username might be someone you personally know who is having the same issues you are. I feel like it would be really helpful to not go through this alone. That being said, I know I probably don’t actually know any of you, but just in case, my names Austin. This way everybody I actually know doesn’t have to know, and maybe somebody with the same issues will find me. Kind of a long-shot, but it can’t hurt, right?

I could do it…

It would be so easy..

Everyone thinks I’m fine..happy..

No one suspects a thing…

I could sit in the bathroom and just cut..

I take long in the shower anyways..by the time they figure it out..

I’ll be gone..

I could pop pills till I can’t anymore…

There’s enough medicine at home to…

So what’s holding me back??

Won’t they all be better off?

Why am I still being selfish and living…and ruining everything..??

is not a sign of weakness but rather that you have been strong for far too long.

It feels like it gets better sometimes but then I just think about where I am in my life and what I want and there seems to be such a gap. I’m not without my talents and I’ve got decent enough looks but it seems I cannot connect with anyone in any notable way. My friends around me tell me things, sometimes try to make me feel better, but its like their words are whipping by me in a wind tunnel.

I age and age, and there are less and less places for me to fit in and feel comfortable. I wish I could put it […]

I got arrested last week for masturbating in a public mall. I face up to 6 years in prison.

Failed again. Got a large scab four inches long vertically on my wrist. Don’t know if I’m doing it wrong or if I just need to go deeper but can’t cause of my own fears.

I just can’t tell if there is something that I am unconsciously living for or if I just screw up when trying. There is nothing that I can point out that I am living for, nothing that is stopping me really.

I’ll think about it but will probably give it another go in a couple of days to a week.

I’m not doing this anymore. I’m done with living. I have pushed myself way to far. I wanted to be dead a long time ago. I don’t know why I kept on breathing. Cutting helped for a bit. Now I want more.

anyone know in Australia if i can just go to a local gp or medical center to get prescribe anti-depressants from a normal doctor?

The classical suicide, to fall on your sword.  People don’t have swords anymore, I’ve never even seen one except in the movies.  But it’s part of historical literature.

Shakespeare: For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin?          bodkin = dagger

Also Juliet stabbing herself with Romeo’s dagger

Saul’s suicide in the Bible: Then Saul said to his armorbearer, “Draw your sword, and thrust me through with it, […]

dear R,

i’m sorry. i can’t give up on us. i can’t stop thinking of you. i need you, i miss you, don’t give up on me. please, i need you. i don’t think i’ll ever be happy without you. please, come back. i’m sorry, but please stop ignoring me. please stop hurting me. i’m so hurt and i can’t breathe. please talk to me. what if i never find love? what if you’re all i have? what if no one ever loves me the way i love them? we could have made it. but you gave up. you loved me the way i love you. […]

One shot, that is all I needed when I bought this gun. This time it was real. I didn’t think about taking it too far. This was for me, to end my pain and misery. It was 1996, the year that I hit rock bottom and there was no drugs or alcohol involved. It was severe depression. It was that year as it’s said “the love of my life” and I broke up. But the worst was yet to come. My Grandfather was dying. A man who showed me things in life that never would have been possible for me to learn since my father […]

According to my family, having suicidal thoughts doesn’t count, and it’s a big cry for attention, and I have ABSOLUTELY no reason to want to die. Hm, I guess having a dead father, and an abandoned mom doesn’t count.

At 4 am she lays in bed,

Listening to her favourite band,

Thinking of all the things she’s done wrong.

At 4 am she thinks of all those who left,

She blames herself for them leaving.

Suddenly she starts crying,

She finally let’s it all out.

She’s not as strong as she once was.

So, my own mother called me an ugly, useless ***** today.

Wow, thanks mum!

Because you obviously don’t seem to know I already know that.

I’ve actually never felt so fucking low in my whole life. Never felt so fucking worthless. I’m stupid and ugly and shit. I’m never ever going to amount to anything. Which means my only options are stay stuck in this shithole for the rest of my life. Or just end it all. And let me be honest, the latter just sounds far more tempting.
I have nothing going for me, nothing. Everyone else around me are just such wonderfully smart and beautiful, with amazing talents and ambitions. Then there’s just me, struggling to make it from one end of the day to the other. Stuck […]

I know I’ve just posted this, but….. I like mingling :/

I’m a 21 year year old guy from the UK. I battle anxiety, depression, and constant suicidal thoughts. I don’t often open up straight away, but I’m sure if you do and are interested I will. I like when others open up to me. It saddens me to know so many suffer. I would say I can be nice and fun to talk too. I can be immature. And I’m really sarcastic, though I try to make it obvious when I am. I like a variety of songs, but I enjoy alternative/indie/rock songs more so. […]