whats the point in hurting us more, you wont be helping us if you make us cry on here if you dont let us get our friendly advice your just making it worse.
no im not putting the blame on you but the thing is the dissing needs to stop because its not what people need its just bullying.
Why me
what did i do
all i ever did
was love you
i tried my best
i gave my all
why did you laugh
as you saw me fall
i gave in
so did you
i slit my wrist
and forgot about you
you walked away
and left me alone
the streets and corners
became my home
i miss you
you hate me
i have to face
reality
youre not coming back
ill move on
maybe when
im dead and gone
I haven’t been on this site in about a year. I remember I was restlessly up all night. And being alone with your thoughts is never good haha. I’m back again right now to vent I guess. I’ve been suicidal ever since I was about twelve years old. As ridiculous and Dumb as that sounds. I’ve always just planned on writing out a note, leaving home, and walking around for a couple days alone to think about everything that’s happened in my life. I would then proceed to hang myself from a bridge. My actual life hasn’t been terrible. I wasn’t abused, and I also […]
When someone who claims to love you, then hates you or at least resents you. What’s really sad is when someone who claims to love you, suddenly couldn’t give a fuck about you. It hurts so much, it makes it a lot harder to fight this monster inside my head. Why do people use the word love so ligtly? It makes doubt everything people say to just make you feel good for a moment.
i freaking called a crisis line what the fuck is wrong with me they will call the cops and send me back to the looney bin god i hope the police dont show up at my house tonight.I even told her the state i live in.Now i feel even worse.I hope i get the chance to end myself tomorrow since they think its friday
Fine you want a back story don’t you?
Ive been wanting to die since I was 14 years old. I’m 27. I’ve survived mulitple suicide attempts. I dont have the courage to jump off a building or blow my brains out with a gun.
I’ve tried hypothermia in a freezing river. I pissed myself before i jumped into that water, oh it fucking burned so bad i couldnt stand it, i was like alright ima just get a gun this shit is too painful. Then I got a gun and couldnt pull the trigger, I was going to shoot myself in the temple and thats like one […]
the body with a dead soul-
i look at myself and think,
Am i real?
when i look deeper into my heart
to find my soul,
its like looking in an abyss,
for the bottom.
i hear the voices of others
in my head
but not a sound from myself,
not even a heartbeat can be heard.
i take a look at myself and say,
do i exist?
i start to go insane
without the soul keeping me together
i start loosing emotions such as
Love, Hatred And most of all
Trust.
Everything makes sense when I’m severely depressed.
Why, what I need to do makes sense.
And I don’t want to be here because there’s something very wrong with me.
We can have valid reasons to want to die; hope wishes the opposite.
Sooo time for my story. I cant really tell the reason why I am writing this but thats kind of in our nature since we are all here because we dont see the point of anything anymore right? Can anyone tell me who invented this emotional terror game called life? I want to cut out my brain. I want to take the biggest knife in the house and just carve it out of my skull. And when Im finished with it, I want to grab it and shout with it. Squeeze it and hit it and tear it apart. Just to make a revenge. Just […]
Back on my anti-depressants/anxiety/orgasms/emotions. I feel much lighter, less anxious, speak my mind more. But, I feel nothing. So, I do a line, or have some wine.
I don’t really care about life. I’ve started dating older men, 40s-50 because…well I guess I feel ugly. I feel bored. Life is consistently pointless. I guess I feel these men will validate me in some way. Hm. No, I don’t look to them for a “father figure”, my dad has always made an effort to be in my life and still is.
I’m just…wandering. Good things may happen but, meh. I just want to lay in bed all […]
If you told me 2 years ago that I would be taking Organic Chemistry I would laugh at your face (because I barely got an A in PreAP Chemistry) and then ask what Organic Chemistry is because I would have never heard of it before. Yet here I am, taking Organic Chemistry. I planned on killing myself in August and now I have pushed the date back to the end of my semester finals. But seriously what am I waiting for? I basically have only 2 friends and the only things I do with them is attend class together and occasionally study. Making friends is […]
just wondering – for how long has it been since you guys felt in any way in control of your emotions? because i am definitely not anymore. just crying randomly/in public or happy for no reason at other moments….
in other news, someone told me not to kill myself today. obviously completely unaware of what these words meant to me, but still slightly amusing nonetheless
Read the title again. Do have those eyes? Do you see the lies? You might think you do, but many of you (myself included) do not see the most obvious of lies, the ones from the people you love the most. When you love someone oh so dearly, you don’t want to see the bad out of them whether it be a boyfriend, mother, father, husband, wife, best friend etc. But let me tell you when you finally see those lies. It will hit you. I’m not saying everyone around you is bad. But those people you call friends, are they really your friends? When […]
That little kiss you stole, it held my heart and soul. And like a ghost in the silence i disappear, don’t try to fight the storm, you’ll tumble overboard. Tides will bring me back to you.
I don’t understand how a man who has woken up, whose switch has got ON, who has reflected, call it whatever, can ever go upwards. where can he ever find a base to start build things up? once he got into this spiral of reflecting he will keep going deeper & deeper, down & down but won’t ever hit a bottom. so how can such a man ever go up on the ladder of success, or on any ladder that goes upwards for that matter? and yet there are so many intelligent people who only keep going up. surely they must have reflected. do they lie […]
Comanders marshal troops and both sides believe they are right,
Oh how they fight, oh how the darkness and the light fight!
Malevonant leaders hide in plain sight,
Ever scheming ever plotting, they have become a plight
For ever day and every night
Obliviouly do they test their might,
Resolutely do they stand in spite!
Hundreds die within this strife,
Every lasting is their fight,
Let them have their knights
Perchance i have become a knight of light
(all coments in some form of rhym or rap or something or i will delete them)
I can’t do this anymore. I can’t pretend to put on a brave face when inside I wanna cry. I can’t live like this. I can’t keep my head above water. I am drowning and feel like I can’t swim. No one listens. No one cares. I am useless. What do I contribute to anything? I can’t and don’t want to feel like this. I see everyone around me that has a great life, while I’m stuck here underground. Y the fuck do I have to keep living. I’ve tried to not, but keep getting dragged back. I’ve been told its bc I have a […]
I’m tired of being sad so I’ll just try to be happy and try to stop worrying so much about things I can’t change…
there is no point in staying….nobody gives a fuck…..i just got out of rehab and it is fucking worse than before i left……FUCK LIFE