Have you ever felt like u can’t breath, dying to catch a breath
your chest is about to explode,
can’t even think ,
u feel so extremely sad but you can’t cry, like you just wanna scream.
This is all the shit in my life and its so long because there is so much shit in my life…
In my teenage years i had almost no friends and pretty much only met with my cousins who ditched me and my brother pretty quickly after they went back to the school all their friends were at. Then my cousins left and I officially went out a few times in the 7 months they were gone. Then my parents were in a car accident that left my father paralysed and my mother dead. I then convinced my father to let me and my siblings move […]
I think I am totally a worthless being, and I really believe that if I die, this world will even become a slightly better place. pretending to be a normal person is hard and painful for me, I feel like everyday I have to go through is a endless torment till my death, I feel like I’m walking on a mine field, but I don’t wanna get blown up. I’m cynic, impatient, hypocritical and boring, these traits are ingrained in my soul , I won’t be able to get rid of them until I die, because I still need them to survive, to extend my […]
Offingself soon prepare for death, if there is anything you want to do now is the time because soon none of this will exist matter whatever
you know this world is truely fucked up.I cant wait til my next time to off myself.I came so close to death a couple days and i got scared as hell that i was probably die.Now i realize maybe dying and fear is a natural thing you experience when you die.Theres no way as darkness starts to cover you that you wouldnt want to turn back no matter what you say.Anyway i took twelve sleeping pills and they saved my ass.The psychiatrist is like are you going to be safe to go home and i told her not at the second but in a week […]
I want to set myself on fire right now. For me, it’s the method I like the most. Fuck everything. I find it amusing that in a moment of dark despair, I end up getting bullied on a depression chat room. Not going to bother writing much this time, anything I say or do falls on deaf ears and blind eyes. After hearing sound advice from life, I think I’m going to go duct tape my mouth shut and save everybody the trouble from having to hear me.
I don’t care if you think I’m being serious or not. I’m going to die, you’re […]
There are so many things that i want to do but i don’t want to do them at the same time. What do i really want anymore? It drives me crazy to be constantly at war with myself,everyday I wake up and wish i hadn’t. Then later on in the day i fight my suicidal thoghts because imafraid of dying and its a neverending cycle. I can’t escape it and it makes me feel torn apart and like i’m going to lose my head.
I have one person that insists i tell her everything, but when i do, she doesn’t know what to say to me. She doesn’t understand why I feel ab certain way or why i behave a certain way. Its so difficult to try to explain things to her and then she gets mad because i don’t give her a good answer. I can’t keep telling her things because i can’t explain anything and she doesn’t want to listen just interrogate me and i cannot stand it any longer.
But i don’t know what to do without her… i am too dependent on her […]
right now…a knife is sounds amazing think ima grab one and play with it…just need blood..or someone…or death. hmmm yeah:/
For some reason it occurred to me this evening that I’ve never told anyone my story. Ever. So now it’s time to. I guess I need to start at the very beginning. Apologies; conciseness isn’t my thing.
It was fall of 2008. I was a senior in high school. I was on top of the world, and I had no idea.
I had a boyfriend. It wasn’t anything serious, but I really liked him. More than any guy I’d ever dated. My friends and I had just had the most amazing summer -we’d discovered the fun that alcohol could bring us. I had a best friend who […]
It’s funny how often times in life, what we want, we don’t have, and what we have, we don’t want.
And the kicker being that when we finally do get what we want, we don’t want it anymore.
I know this has been a recurring theme in my life.
Those things or experiences that I wanted, or thought I wanted, I just couldn’t seem to get them when I really wanted to have them.
And by the time I finally got those things or was able to have those experiences, I didn’t want or need them anymore.
What’s the point of having desires and dreams and fantasies when in the […]
Theres something about knowing you will die soon, and it triggers fun for me, im living to the fullest my last weeks and having the time of my life, ive had all my dreams come true already so now that shit has beyond hit the fan, im so ready to die, i cant take anymore, i dont want to live, nothing will keep me from suicide, its what i need to do… but advice for you, live to the fullest before you decide to end your life.. the way my life is, i wont be ariund to see 2013 and i do look forward […]
*stands up*
Hello. My name is Rain. I currently suffer from depression and heartbreak. I also have an addiction to people and cutting.
I understand that my addiction to people stems from my fear of being alone. I’m currently working on my addiction to people by turning off all care I have for anyone other than my immediate family. Since yesterday I have not helped or checked on anyone, given out hugs or kisses, or spoken to anyone face to face about my problems. I’m here tonight because i am currently having people withdrawals and […]
Il be so happy when i suceed at suicide, hangging is most likely the way, ive tryed three times last month, came close to blacking out but it difficult to sufficate to death, i really get these erges sometimes to just die… it is something i must do, and soon… ive research other methods, so i have a partcial plan..nothing in this life will stop me.. i just have a lil business to take care of for my father then il be more determend to die… i live these hours,days and know that it only take a few minuites to depart and die..so i think […]
I’ve wanted to kill myself since i was 16, i have tried a few times. i cut my arms open and tried to OD on pain killers but have always been caught before i went. I have always been lonely. I have never had a friend or girlfriend in my life. I can guarantee that no one will ever love me outside my family, and I’m sure that many people would kill even for that, but it just isn’t the same. I feel all the more like worthless crap because of that. I had no reason to want this until recently, but i still did. I […]
Mostly, I can deal with the day to day bullshit of this world, and for the most part I manage to stay positive, which is almost impossible in this fucked up world we live in. I HATE IT HERE! Believe it or not, one of my major roles in life, is encouraging people…and Im damned good at it. I do what I do because I have a deep love for humanity, I feel your pain, and I HATE IT HERE…so if I must be here, let me do all I can to help and encourage others. It hurts my heart to see good people suffering […]
Hello my name is azzan. i turned 21 years old about a month ago.
OKÂ now i really don’t know where to start i live in Peoria Illinois and it isn’t very fun around here.
Ever sense i remember, i never really did much in my life and iv really hated it i am a 21 year old virgin And im dont like to do this but im just feeling like every thing is really lost to me iv found a lot of stress.
I have no self esteem no heart and im so fucked up i have not found any love in my life it sucks its […]
To kill myself cos I ain’t got the guts!
I had to start over after the recession. I moved to a new city and started a new life. Put the past behind me. Created a new me. Found the job of my dreams! Everything was going better than I ever expected.
Then it all came crashing down. I became best of friends with a coworker who had recently moved there too. We grew closer and closer. Her supervisor got jealous and scared her and turned her against me. They teamed up and got me fired. I never did anything wrong. I am a […]