Not really sure how to start this post or how to talk about this, i guess the comfort is in that nobody knows me.  I’m at a dead end , im only the good person i think i am.  I have so much hate in me im almost misanthropic , but i love company , but at the same time i hate it.  My life has been ok , ive traveled places i have people in my life, my sister and mother and some friends.  But i have come to the stage where i just don’t want to deal with living anymore,  i have suffered from being empty for a long time , the doctors […]
I keep telling my guy that it’s getting harder & harder to not end my pain. I am flustered and short tempered with him bc I want him to help me, I want someone to see that I do not attempt I have been talking about it for a long time, that when I try I will in fact die. I have these reels of rapes and hurt, abandonment, success then failure that just play in my head and I cannot get them to stop. I did a program for PTSD and I use to be some hot shot CEO, but it’s like… I still […]
I’ve passed my deadline. Life is worse than ever. I have my prep suppies (meds,alcohol)just need to prepare my actual method of choice.
I am so ready to go…i just need the final push to DO IT.
Please post if you can help me get there.
To everyone else that wants to suggest something along the lines of “dont give up,” please save your comments. I’m going to go. The decision has been made. I just want moral support from thos ewho dont oppose it.
I’ve been feeling really lonely lately….. just need someone to talk to like 24/7 or something.(like more than just every so often.) idk.. maybe someone my age or close to 14.. doesn’t matter, girl or boy.. please email me or something. and btw i don’t really care how much older you are from me.. i just need someone who won’t leave. Â thank you
-morgan… rawrimaturtle…
Hi. I’m fairly new here but it seems like a good place to share my writing. I don’t know if anyone else will appreciate it but I just want to put it out there…
I wrote this last night. It’s meant to be a song but I suck at putting things to music, so it’s just lyrics. Feel free to make up your own tune if your musical. I sing…
Anyways, feel free to give me feedback. I’ve never shown my stuff to anyone before because I’m pretty good at pretending to be alright and I don’t want to ruin all that hard work. Here it is:
for years i was always with my bff we had a great time…until i starting making new friends. she didnt like that, wanted me 2 get rid of them. it was bullshit then in2005 age 13 i was diagnosed with seizures she was with me when the 1st one happened.i fell down 2 flights of stairs and split my head open..after i got outta the hospital i called to tell her i was ok and she said”hey, i gotta go” she never said a word to me after that. thats wat had sparked it all..
So i havnt been on here in awhile but i need some advice really bad so me and my brother just got into a fight and he threw up in my face how i had to keep swiching school due to bullys and how i tried to kill myself andi didnt cry in front of him but now that im alone i cant stop i mean how could you say that to someone and now im feeling very suicidal i just cant take it in this house anymore and i want out not only this house but this life idk what to do i need […]
You know, it really stinks to watch people struggle and fight to live for almost a year, only to be told that they are too “weak” to handle any more surgeries and die. It’s hard to watch their family try to cope with such a traumatic loss while being supported by thousands of caring people. Every person you lose, it feels like you lose part of yourself.
Rest in peace, Sgt. Jarboe.
“If you ain’t Cav, you ain’t shit!”
I just slept for a long time, but all I can say is that right now I feel exhausted.
I’m tired of everything in my life at the moment.
I’m tired of the endless monotony of school and exams. I have a countdown to summer in my Planner, but knowing I still have 95 days does not do a lot to comfort me.
I’m tired of people, and the person I’m expected to be.
I’m tired of myself, and the person I’m too afraid to be.
I’m tired of the fact that everywhere I’m just not good enough anymore.
I can’t do anything properly and just fuck it all up when […]
So if I were to figure out a way to pinpoint an exact time of death I would probably go through with it. I would want it to be the exact moment the great Titanic slipped beneath the ocean surface. But since I know that is impossible I am forced to remain in this cursed waste of a life for a while longer.
Why do you hurt me the way you so??
Why do you talk to other girls, am I not good enough for you?
Why do you abuse me, I can’t the beatings much longer.
Why must you lie to me all the time?
Why do you think I am the way I am?
Why do you talk to the nasty hoes you do?
Why do you think I am an idoit?
Why can’t i get real answers from you?
I can’t take this anymore, I can’t takw being beaten by a guy anymore, I’m a girl who is lost for words. I’m just lost and […]
I posted on monday, saying that i will overdose on medication and i actually did that. I did a suicide attempt on tuesday. Well, i actually knew i was going to survive because i knew the pills weren’t enough to make my heart stop beating. I took 19 pills of efexor with cough syrup. I went to school and they’ve called an ambulance there. It was to late to empty my stomach. When i was in the hospital they’ve let me drink something that looks like black waterpaint with sand. It didn’t tasted but the feeling was awful and they’ve took soom blood. They wanted to […]
What are the Pros & Cons to suicide in your opinion? Anyone??????
A lot of people want to know “my story†and why I self harm and why I starve and things like that. But I don’t have a specific thing that made me who I am. My life had always been shit. So I guess I should just give the over look of it all.
When I was very young, I was home schooled, and an only child. I was completely spoiled. My dad worked and my mom would take me to do tap, ballet, caly pottery, charcoals, gymnastics, karate, and anything else my little heart desired. By the age of 5, I had just about […]
Hi. This is my first time ever posting to this site or anything like this site. I found this site doing research for my suicide, but I’ve come back multiple times just to read the posts because it seems that there are people here I can identify with.
So I suppose that I should tell my suicide story? I will try, but it’s not much of a story. It’s nothing compared to some of the things I read here, or see and hear at school. I know I have no right to feel the way I do, but that knowledge doesn’t change what I feel, it […]
i just started cutting again. word of advice… taking 7 Aleve to get rid of a headache only intensifies it. ugh… i feel awful… i am at school right now. i was about to slit my throat in the restroom but some ***** walked in & i had to hide the blade fast.
This is my first time posting. But I am feeling kinda suicidal right now. I was on medication for like 7 years, I dunno I guess I was just naturally depressed since a very young age, but now it’s been 6 months that I’m off it. I honestly feel like killing myself now, cuz I can’t feel shit in my heart.. I have a girl and there’s lots of people and friends that really care about me.. But nonetheless I don’t feel much.. My daily schedule is like a bit fucked, try to keep busy but not much going on.. Just waiting to go off […]
For all of those people who have commented on my posts. Thank you! I really like this website and I feel like I can share my feelings and people will understand what I’m going through or what I’m feeling.
So today I asked one of my guy friend if he thinks I’ll ever find love. He relied “no offense but no”. I’m going to be forever alone… Why dntni just give up now and end my life? I hate the pain I go threw everyday alone! I can’t take it anymore! I need that special someone to help me… My boyfriends always to busy to talk to me….
I hate this pain.. And there’s nothing I can do….
-Morgan….RawrImaTurtle
Daily I think about suicide, but I don’t act on it. It’s just that, combined with school, discovering my sexuality, my appearance and family problems, I don’t know what else to do. Every time I think about this, I think I’m being irrational, but I still can’t help the urge to do it. One thing that really led me to this was discovering I was sexually attracted to girls. Being a girl myself, I find this very hard to understand, due to the fact that I’ve had crushes on guys in the past.
When I think back on it now, sometimes I wonder whether this was […]