The last day of 2011…to enter year 2012,..The important Year possibly for mankind..(whether you believe it or a skeptic),
anything could happen, and getting bigger..
Be prepared o humans..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSNiI7PgD-8

… and the end game is near. It’s like walking into a cave and it keeps getting darker and narrower. I started coming to this conclusion close to a year ago. Like so many others, I had a decent and comfortable life that was turned upside down by the global economic meltdown. I’ve met adversity before and it does not scare me – I’m kind of a “roll with the punches” kind of guy.

A little background for you all – I’ve been married and divorced 3 times – 2 kids – a girl and a boy, each with a different mother. The girl is an […]

Ok, so apparently, being suicidal is a bad thing.
They approach my “condition” with scorn.
They ask me, “Why can’t you just be normal like everyone else?”
They throw pills in my face and tell me to get better… As if it was that simple. LOL… I’m a waste of space in this morbid world, and, pills aren’t going to make it all better. So far, they haven’t. And it’s been quite some time now. 🙁
Honestly, I don’t wanna be like this… ‘I am (in the words of Korn) clearly broken and no one knows what to do’~ >_>

So apparently, being suicidal is a […]

I often feel like I can’t relate to this material, physical earthly world anymore, and the majority of people here on this planet earth.
I often feel like there must be something MORE than this limited existence of our human body,
or I’m afraid if it’s all my human’s “creative” wishful-thinking and made-up escapism feeling/story..
does my human brain playing all these tricks on me, or it is really REAL: that there are indeed something much MORE that I can access/connect/tap into?..but I just need to find HOW to do it?..

Tell me please: is there really something MORE that I can do and ‘ascend/transcend’ in […]

I don’t want to die, but I’m so scared of feeling this way forever.

Sometimes it’s hard to see the difference between the two.

At the end of the year, and the end of another shitty week I look at my contacts list on my phone and realise that I can’t call anyone without them feeling put out. They will feel like they are obliged to lend some of their time to some low-life scum like me, and at the end of the transaction they will feel like they regretted spending their time doing so.

I have wasted my opportunities at life… and death. Instead of using what I got to end my pain, I wasted it in small doses ‘recreationally’ and ended up just prolonging the pain… Though I […]

Three months ago I decided tomorrow is/was going to be the day that I die. Ive waited so long for this day to come but now that its here I dont know if I can go through with it. Its not that I dont want to die anymore. I dont know tonight im really just so confused. Maybe im just a coward or afraid it wont work again …

 Do you know what it feels like to wake up every morning and need to cut to get up and start your day?… do u know how it feels to be rejected from your school, friends and family?.. to be ignored at home and everyone just tell me all i want is attention?… well how’s this for “just attention” … i have attempted suicide six times. tonight was my sixth time.. everyday i wake up feeling like i am useless and un important, that id be better off dead. i looke for every reason in the world to cry. i sit in cornners, write lyrics […]

Ten minutes ago I finished writing a suicide note. It ended with me telling everyone here that: “…I hope 2012 brings everyone here something that I couldn’t find, a new start, harmony and… the desire to live life.”

These past two years I have literly found peace in the idea of killing myself but it shouldn’t be that way. I don’t want to throw this opportunity away. I don’t want to end my life but I’m just so mad. There are so many people that have laughed at me, teased me, used me, looked past me, thrown me away… I’m so mad at seeing them have such […]

How do you cope?

when your…
…friend who you thought was your best friend left you?
…mother decides not to believe in you and wants to disown you?
…brother and sister decides to not stand up for you and stay with your mother instead, even though you truly believe you are right?
…only friends are the good friends, but no close friends?
…love life is in shit-hole?
…university academic is being affected by your drastic (depression) behavior?
…thoughts of suicide is re-surfacing, stronger than ever?

I am sleeping alone now in a hotel. My mother just left me to sleep in our new apartment. My brother […]

Your family is supposed to protect you and look after you. I wish i had a family like that.

Ever since i was little i was bullied by my brother. And because my eldest brother seen this he would protect me and bully him back.
I understand that this probably wasn’t the best method of trying to stop him but it helped me through alot.

Now my eldest brother has left and has changed. I have no one to look after me so i have started fighting for myself and i will admit it, i am pretty good at it. However now that he knows i’m STILL […]

I push you away, but i keep going back for more. I utter the words and maybe after all this time they’re not true. It’s me I don’t trust believe me its not you. Not even you can take my pain away. I want to leave this world, but I know I have to stay. So God if you’re out there please hear my cries. I try and shut out the world tired of their lies. The more I try, the more I feel trapped. “She was such a good girl” they’ll say. “Until she just…..snapped.”

“I no longer know where my life is heading, i wish i can say, but i cant. Just don’t be surprised if one day, everyones wish will come true, and ill disapear and never be seen again.”

I sent them all a note.

Wrote all the things to explain why i done it to them.

Saying these goodbyes were the hardest thing life could show me.

But they were meant to happen, for i had no future.

Now they can have theirs.

i just need someone to give all my love to and to be loved in return

is that too much to ask?

So, I got to thinking about how a parent’s personality can really screw a kid up and effect them throughout their lifetime.
Then that thought led me into another about the state of the world.
I came up with a question for all of you insightful people on this site. I’m curious and I’d love to know what everyone thinks.

Before I ask my question, I want to highlight some facts (that you should already be aware of);
-The world population is now 7 billion and counting. Overcrowding is becoming an issue.
-Global warming is getting increasingly worse. More natural disaters destroying homes and land. Ice […]