I have a routine I go by everyday. I bleed, cry and die. I wish I was able to fly. It would make everything better. I write a letter, stating that my time has come. Will you know who it’s from? I crawl in this hole, not wanting to be found. There is no love, no warmth, not a sound. Rotting slowly inside. Feel like I’m caught in a tide. Drowing, can’t breath.
I have GAD, which is short for Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I have never been diagnosed: my mother calls it Paranoia, and my father doesn’t call it anything.
I worry about everything. About nothing. I can’t stop it. I want to.
I have tried therapy, but it is too hard for me. I am too introspective and feel the need to justify everything I think or do. I don’t want anyone to judge me. And so I never got anything from therapy. Whenever I talk to my boyfriend he just reminds me that I have an anxiety disorder. And my friends all push me to the therapist. […]
If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
oh oh oh oh
Lord make me a rainbow, I’ll shine down on my mother
She’ll know I’m safe with you when she stands under my colors, oh and
Life ain’t always what you think it ought to be, no
ain’t even grey, but she buries her baby
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I’ve had just enough time
If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of […]
Ummm… Hey there. Im just sitting here. Im here for whoevere needs someone to talk to. I want to help someone out through whatever they are going through. If you need someone to talk to dont hesitate to contact me. I know how you feel and I feel pretty stable right now. I just want somebody feel the stability I feel at this point in my life. message me if you need someone to talk to or someone to listen to you. Chico.the.mushroom@gmail.com.
I’m 24. I’m a nurse. I’m a mother. I have friends who love me. I have a job that I’m well respected at. I have good clothes on my back, and food at my table. I have a boyfriend that’s watched me try to die at least 5 times now in agony.
I remember feeling this way since I was 15 when I tried it the first time. There will be periods I can tolerate myself. Then there are those periods where I cannot. Those are the times when I think my heart is folding onto itself. […]
Do you know as I do, delectable suffering?
And do you have them say of you: “O! the strange man!”
— I was going to die. In my soul, full of love,
A peculiar illness; desire mixed with horror,
Anguish and bright hopes; without internal strife.
The more the fatal hour-glass continued to flow,
The fiercer and more delightful grew my torture;
My heart was being torn from this familiar world.
I was like a child eager for the play,
Hating […]
i am researching suicide pacts for my research paper and i read that about 1/3 of the young people who attempt or commit suicide are gay or lesbian. You know why that is? Because people in this world are to stupid to see past peoples differences and they judge them based on what they think they should be instaed of loving them for who they are. how about before noticing one thing wrong with someone we realise a couple of the things that maybe aren’t so perfect about ourselves. so if you happen to read this and you are homosexual or bisexual i support you […]
“You are right though when it comes to noticing pain but you are wrong about those in pain because they need to see themselves before anyone else”
Well Duuuuuuh!,
If you read again this is what i am speaking about, the Altruistic Intention, right?. if you didn’t know what it meant let me explain,
it means Selflessness which is the opposite of Selfishness – helping others regardless of whether or not your are suffering also,  in pain or have suffered, without an ulterior motive,, not to receive anything in return for helping them!,without pride or pretension
due to the sick human of today if one is not in pain they will […]
Male. 1972. Crippled good in ’98.
Back surgery
Twice 2001
Once 2010
Last six years, 90mg morphine 12 hour release every 12 hours. Plus 3x10mg instant release per day.
Two years ago I swallowed 15 x60mg SR ( not crushed ).
Next attempt will be 30 x60mg this time
I will crush them.
You wanna know where most of the loneliness and loathsomeness lies in Websites/Forums like these, you get these hypocritical ‘Tourist’ well wishers who at bottom don’t ‘really’ give a flying fuck. but why should they? where is there to be found such help, such “love”, such courageous hero’s for the Paraplegics, Amputee’s, Veterans, Drug Addicts Homeless Child Runaways Etc on the streets and some that hold signs that say “starving”, “will work for food” why do these compassionate humans, these heroes walk past ignoring them pretending that they were not there, not apart of their society.. if the sign said instead “I Am Going To Kill Myself Today” maybe this would […]
My sister is dead. My cousin is dead. My father hates me, that’s why he left. My mom loves her fiance’s dick more than she loves me. I have no friends. If I did they wouldn’t even care if I was on the brink of suicide. Everyone uses me. They hate me. I’m nothing but just a fat, stupid, emo, gothic, ugly, worthless piece of shit. They don’t care. You don’t care. I don’t care. I’m dead..
hey everyone i have posted on this site befor in the past. im 19 and yeah im young but ive been in the dark for a while. I was in the darkest time of my life about a month ago. Now i know that are problems are lives and problems arent the same. Theres no miracle word i can say to help you all. But i know that some encouraging words that some of you have said to me have helped. im no one special just another guy in this world. But man it gets bettre eventually. just hold on. Even the smallest things can […]
A little sad, a little low if I do it I’ll never KNOW….
What another day could bring
My friends won’t understand this THING
That grips me tight, yet doesn’t
SHOW
Hey its me the 13 year old again dont look forward to anymore posts from me tonight at midnight im definitely commiting suicide no more pain and suffering
You have taken away everything from me. My relationship with my mom, my love for my family, and my life. I hate you. I’m slipping. Falling. Dying. I dont want any help. I want everyone to take turns stabbing and shooting me. Alone…..forever..
Hey all, I know many people post here while in the throws of passion. Trust me, I’ve been there – the fitting music, the feeling of such despair and hopelessness that you projectile vomit your disgust in words, that only pain can relieve it.
However, I’d like to hear from some of the people who’ve made it through that stage. I’d like to hear from the people for whom the question of suicide has become more philosophical than emotional, the people who now calmly wait and plan for the big event. I’m still looking at over a month out, picked the end […]
WHAT IS THE POINT OF. LIFE?
WHY ARE WE HERE?
please answer. i honestly dont know.
Life sucks at times, but it does get better. I used to think my life sucked so much, that I actually wanted to take my own life. I wanted to cut into my wrist so deep that I bled to death. All because of things that happened to me, such as bad grades, losing friends, friends making bad mistakes, fighting with my family, cutting, being made fun of, etc. I have gone through basically anything you can mention. My point in this is, don’t give up. If these things happen to you, it’s for a certain reason. Not just to hurt you, and make you […]
I am dying slowly. No one’s there to save me from this hell..razor blades have become my best friends. Ciggarettes have become a routine. If I tell you, you run to the Child Protective Services like you always do. I can’t tell you nothing..you don’t care anyways. I might as well take this razor to my wrist and cut, before I have to see you for Christmas. It would make me feel so much better to watch the blood swiftly slide down my arm. Draining the life out of me. I might just do it now..my mom might send me to a Pysch Ward, […]
Born into a loving, caring. happy family. Life was so sweet then. What’s this bitterness that surounds me? Where did it come from? That’s right. It came from you. You were gone all through the night. In the morning, you were passed out on the couch. I remember the words you said to me that night. I was in my bedroom, I thought you were coming to tell me you love me and sweet dreams but you said “I’m not just divorcing your Mother, I’m divorcing you kids.” Those words are stuck to my brain. Why have you left me? What did I do wrong? […]