I’m 17 years old, I suffer from BDD(body dysmorphic disorder), social anxiety, depression, and I’m pretty sure I have unstable emotions. My father committed suicide when I was 3 years old and from then my mother raised me and my two older sisters while she abused depression pills, she would always go out to drink and come home drunk and mean, whenever a guy would come into her life she forgot she had children. I was too young to realize all that was happening around me.I’ve been bullied since I was in 4th grade, I only had one friend until we entered middle school and […]
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5 Months
Sometimes I like to think that things can’t get worse, but then they always do. College is a miserable experience… I have no friends that can hold me together. My family is unsupportive of me ever since I decided not to be religious. I’m not even sure whether or not I’m going to be fired from my job. My car is now not running for the second time this month. And worst of all, my fiancé left me 5 months ago. I was sure this was the lowest point I could get to. And then tonight, the only friend that I had left to really […]
I have lately been crying often due to the problems involving my family. It all started of when i hadn’t been talking to my dad for atleast 5 months.
Cause you see my parents are divorced and now i live with my mum and step-dad and siblings. Anyway, I didnt end up going on holiday with my dad. Kinda sad. Once the summer holidays i had sent him a message saying that im sorry but my phone didnt work so i had no contact with him and i told him that i now am back at home.
He hadn’t called or texted me .. i was getting […]
I just cant see a reason to go on.
I have lost everything in the recession. I was lucky and found a new job in a new place. I found a job I loved. I was a respected professional. I was doing so well. Had my life back on track. I befriended a coworker. We were both in a new city and both new with the company.
I had a new home with a yard for my dogs. Slowly our friendship grew and we both helped each other to do amazing at our new jobs. I started […]
Tonight I am 12 years old and 5 months and some days old
Tonight I might end it
Tonight I may take some pills
Tonight I will probably get chronic organ disorders
Tonight I cut Myself
Tonight I dream about Happiness
Tomarrow I will wake up fine or with regret
In a week I will be in school, Sad with mixed emotions
In a mouth my good friends will be my worst enimes
In a year I will be closer to death
In a life time I will be dead, Happy
But
Tonight I will be dreaming about Ethan, oh how I love him,he is […]
The trigger – my long-term partner ending things. Not a unique trigger and millions go through this each year. So I’m told, so I tell myself. They can get through it, why can’t I? Slowly but perceptibly I feel myself going down and further down. My thoughts are racing, are dead, I have no idea what I’m doing. I can’t eat and can sleep only with sleeping pills. I begin cutting myself and have NO IDEA where that came from. Cuts all over my arms, then my legs. Sleeves cover it all. Random thoughts of suicide pop into my mind until one day at work […]
I’ve been having depression since the end of 6th grade. I’m now in 10th. I don’t take anti- depressants anymore because they don’t help. Let’s start with the fact that- my family is fucked up. My dad used to beat my mother infront of my brothers and I, and then a few months after, he just packed his things and left us. I haven’t seen him since. He’s a stranger to me – and even though I still have this despise towards him for hurting my mum, I miss having a dad role in my life. The other thing is – I’m overweight. I’m 5’3 […]
this is to all who are considering suicide…please don’t do it, there is so much help for you out there and you can feel happy. my mom had attempted to commit suicide about 5 months ago and i still cannot sleep alone, i have visions at night, and my anxiety is through the roof. something like this cannot be forgotten, your family and friends will be forever scarred, and so will you. i know you may be struggling to the extreme right now but there is so much hope, soo much. please don’t do it, please. <3
I have found this site helpful mainly because I now know I’m not alone.
I’ve always been depressed, since my parents split when I was 4 but I’m now 23 and I dont have anything to show. I had dreams to ve a musician and let them die.I came up with this idea to kill myself (the word suicide disgusts me) about two years ago but my future roommate convinced me better. I convinced myself that it was because she had feelings for me and I could find meaning in life by taking care of her and her child. our relationship got more intense, but […]
This post probably will have little to none importance and I shouldn’t go through with what I will but I am coward and a loser. There’s hasn’t been much failures in my life until now and when I usually set my mind to do something I do it. You know, like a challenge you assign yourself and you are determined to accomplish i by whatever means.
24 of age currently. I’ve lived a normal life I like to think but in reality it’s not. Honestly comparing to some other posts I’ve read in the past few days mine doesn’t come as close for a reason to […]
My Life Just Needs To End…
 Well I’m 16 now but 4 1/2 half years ago my life started to change… For the worst.
 It was my 8th grade year I was so excited to grow up and be a “teenager” I knew a lot of people but didn’t have many friends I kinda kept to myself and my sister got me into weed so I thought I was the only one who smoked at my school. I kept it a secret from even my Bestfriend at a time… But then I met this girl and her name was Alex omg she was amazing she became closer […]
Ten years ago
We were both fifteen. Teenagers. Too old to be called children, and barely old enough to be called teens. Too old to be taken care of, but too young to get many freedoms. Lost, reckless and confused, much like the majority of our age group. Except for one tiny difference: we were being held in a school for emotionally unstable teens.
Neither of us thought there was anything wrong with ourselves, but apparently the rest of the world disagreed. We were both there for the same reason, which was cutting and repeated suicide attempts. Nothing some special school could fix; just a bit of […]
4th of July is in two days, that’s the day i had planned to end it all. I have this amazing guy who walked into my life and makes thinks better but life is still hard. I stooped taking my meds bcz i wanted to think clearly on whether i would go trough with my plans or not. I still have no idea of what im going to end up doing. My boyfriend does not make it easier on me. He knows all about it and he does not want to lose me, he said he can see himself marrying me in the future. I […]
i was a very happy guy i used to live ma life without any depression though i was not having any girl friend nor i do have now bt then to i was satisfied with ma life i also completed my MBA this year i am quite a good looking guy & was expecting a good looking & sexy girlfriend in future but besides that i was having a little gap in my front teeth so i decided to remove those gap by doing composite bonding but that fucking female dentist did not tell me its disadvantages of composites nor she even told me that […]
I joined this community because I was at a loss. I have not been able to find support groups in my area or surrounding area. Since finding this site, I have felt some form of connection with individuals who understand and are struggling too. My story started the day I cut a bit too much and had the gun up to my head.  Then next day, I had been admitted to the hospital for 7 days, and treated for cutting and attempting suicide. The amazing thing since I have been out which has been approximately a month, I wish to God that I would have […]
I have it all. Or so I’m told.
I have a loving husband who supports me. I have a beautiful little girl. She’s 5 months old. I love them. They mean the world to me. But sometimes it’s not enough. The pills on the counter are calling my name. I doubt there’s enough to kill me but I sometimes want to test that hypothesis. I wish I could tell people. I see a therapist. I lie. I tell them I’m fine. I just don’t want to pay for another hospital visit. It would be the 5th one this year.
I took more than I should have. […]
Okay, so when i was three years old, my parents got divorced. I was fine with it, and everything was okay. Untill my dad got remarried…
My step mom has been a b*tch to me basically my whole life. It was kinda like the Cinderella story.. but for a few years (when i was about 7-12) everything was okay. But now im almost 14,. & the past 8 1/2 months or so have been shit.
Its not all because of my dads family. Some of it was me making stupid decisions. I know this may sound ridiculous […]
The pressure is building, and I am about to fucking explode, but I know that if I cut then I’ll be alright even just for a little bit while I stain my arm red. I want to die. But if death would bring me peace then I don’t deserve it. I can’t feel anymore. Does this make sense? I have gone completely numb. All i have is the memories of the actual emotions. but it’s almost as if they are scratching the surface, and maybe if I cut they’ll come seeping out so i can feel again.
Why am I so alone. I feel so empty. […]
I was with the love of my life for 6 years. We loved eachother so much, were wedding planning and never had arguments, just healthy discussions.Â
For the last year of that I became very sick. I am motion sick 24/7 for over a year. I was suicidal. My boyfriend was as strong as he could be, caring for me, but couldn’t take the suicidal thing. He cheated on me 3 times with the same girl. He said he hated it, had no interest in her and struggled to get it up everytime, it was just an escape. He stopped and started seeing a therapist. […]
well ive been with this amazin guy for 1 year, 5 months, nd 1 week.. evryday i feel soo grateful for havin him.. nd hez fixed the problems i had wit my family.. he evn helped me thru the pain of the past 15 yrs of physical abuse ive suffered.. nd evrythin is perfect.. my grades culd use a little help.. other than dat, evrythin is perfect. but wen im alone.. all those thoughts of suicide nd alcohol nd drug abuse come rushin thru my head.. nd i feel like im abt to fall over nd jst pass out.. i get light headed nd feel a […]