I know as a parent you should never just want to kill yourself because it’s selfish but I feel as a parent it would be better for my 5 week old daughter. I’m 18 and I’m alone . The boy that I was supposed to marry cheated on me so I broke up and for a while we lived in the same town and despite the fact he cheated on me physically abused me while I was pregnant with her and emotionally abused me I wanted to work it out for her and then he would call me high and drunk and stalk me and […]
Tag:
abused
Hi all,
I found this site accidentally whilst researching suicide options on-line and I have to say it is quite comforting knowing there are so many people out there that are battling with suicidal wishes…
A little about me…
I am 30, female from UK. I have struggled with depression from a young age and was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder last year.
I showed a lot of promise when I was young, teachers constantly commented on my academic ability and apart from general rebellion I was a good kid, that was until I was 12. I was sexually abused by a family friend and that was the kick start […]
Since I can remember at age 4 my father has physical abused my mother and about two years ago he disappeared her into a canal and took her life away he is now in jail and not ever coming out and my mom was found this summer to make the story short and well I’m here struggling with everything my little sister had to move in with me and I think my bf does not like her sometimes I think he does not like me either I have no friends I block everyone out of mylife I trust no one due to my life experiences […]
Have you ever wanted to die, like, it’s all I really have ever wanted. Hell the first time I tried to kill myself I was 8. But no matter what I can’t because of my family, because I’m scared to death of hurting them. Even though they’re the ones who kicked me out because I called them out on stealing hundreds from me, the people who abused me and beat me no matter how much I cried, the people who screamed how useless, lazy and worthless I was in front of Everyone I knew when I was in 4th grade because I got a D. […]
I feel so pathetic. My life hasn’t even been that bad. I’ve never been physically abused by anyone. Both my parents are alive, and my family isn’t poor…
So why do I feel so depressed… So empty? I feel so tired, but I’m only 13. Why?
Maybe it’s because I have to put on a mask whenever someone is around, after all it’s been that way since I was 9… I think I’m even starting to trick myself with my own mask.
I feel like an actor in a play I never auditioned for… My script is prewritten and made to deceive, my mask to convince. I can’t […]
I gave myself a year to see if I could turn things around. I mean I’ve tried new things and experienced more, but none of that really made a difference. I’m still the same hallow shell I was before.
It’s like re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. You can move them around all you want, but the ships still going under. I haven’t gone under yet, but I can feel the chill in the air from the icy waters I’m soon to plunge into.
Life will swallow me whole as I sink into the depths of darkness. And despite the year not being over yet, I’m […]
I’ve suffered from depression since I can remember.
I attempted suicide when I was thirteen. According to my mother, it was a phase.
I’ve been flirting with anorexia for years. That, she said, was a phase too.
But my mother was often naive about a lot of things.
Like her husband for example. He’s cheated, he’s lied, he hit her and sexually abused her.
My mom was ill. Most of what I remember of her was her being admitted in to hospitals. She was blind. I thought most of her ailments were due to the fact that she had diabetes since she was 11 years […]
If anyone takes the time to read this I really do appreciate it.
Well I feel as if the best place to start is as a child in my childhood I was a last born child having two brothers older than I my oldest being fathers one and only care and the second my mothers I wouldn’t say I was abused by them or ignored but when I tell other people about what happened with me they seem to think I was it was just stuff like my brothers do something they don’t receive punishment and I get the world thrown upon me and such and […]
I just turned 18 about a month ago… But for a long time I’ve suffered from suicidal thoughts.. I’ve attempted it before, but failed and ended up in a hospital to be watched.. They released me in two days… I tried to come back from it, and nearly succeeded… But now, I just don’t want to continue this battle anymore…
When I was younger… I was left in a foster home… I got physically abused, and verbally. I was sexually harassed, and yet… I struggled on… I thought of running away so often I nearly did it… But I was afraid… Then someone “saved” me… Turns […]
“…No Hate”
There’s a few people who are hating me based on something they weren’t there to witness for themselves — they weren’t there, yet they take the word of a woman who is obviously trying to hurt me for how honest I was.
Honesty. I’m brutally honest with everyone I encounter on this forum, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I expect that everyone here is tired of being patronized, bullied, and abused overall by their public. Someone like me should be like a cool breeze on a hot summer day. Not treated like filth. There hasn’t been any evidence of what she claimed […]
I’m abused by my dad
bullied by peers
destroyed by society
and you still want me to be the ‘perfect child’
I am a single mother of two… I just had to terminate my 5th pregnancy and I am only 25. I pissed of my boyfriend by using him and not talking with him, and he was the love of my life. My kids are spoiled and I feel like a stupid slut most of the time. My father sold me sexually from 5 on… And abused me emotionally, physically and sexually. My parents told me I was an accident. I was not meant to be here. I found myself skimming dating and sex sites looking for the man who I will never find. After the […]
OK I GIVE. Everyone jumped on me about my dog, so I will stay alive until she dies. Should only be a few more years. I can’t stand the thought of someone else having her.
Trust.
That word alone makes me confused. It’s something you give to someone and expect them to respect it. I gave that to a couple people and a couple people abused that. Someone close to me, he abused it. What he did changed my view on him forever. He didn’t do much but it was enough to cause my body to tense up and I was paralyzed with confusion and fear.
Why did he touch me that way? Did he think I was my mother? Being intoxicated changes what you see. I don’t know really, I was practically a hold still. It scares me thinking that he […]
You know that girl with the beautiful face,
Cute little body, not a hair out of place?
She’s always the first one to tell you a joke,
Share her advice, or give your ego a stroke.
Her smile can brighten anyone’s day.
She seems so perfect in every way.
Don’t forget she’s so smart and so strong.
You’d never know that you were so wrong.
You don’t notice the scars on her wrists
Or the pain that’s hiding behind hazel eyes.
Makeup covers the brushes from his fists,
While the truth is covered up with her lies.
She really believes that she deserves this.
After all, it’s been like this her whole life.
As a little girl she survived
Strange […]
it all started when i was ten.. my relationship with my parents was horrible, i started rebelling, cutting myself for the pain i felt, nobody loved me back then, my mom emotionally abused me 24*7, every moment at home felt like forever, it was hard.my dad was so controlling, he would scare me with his voice, and behaviour, he took away my phone, my stuffs, called me a dirty hoe. my mom and dad would fight, and scream, and she would threaten him that she will leave the house,or they will get separated. my mom also threw plates at me many times. we lived in […]
Hi, I’m new here so I’m not entirely sure how all this posting works but I thought I should start off explaining how I’m feeling and how I’ve been feeling for a while now.
From the outside my life looks pretty damn great but actually living the way I do is unbearable.
This time 2 years ago I was self harming and contemplating suicide. I then went on to try and commit suicide last May, which obviously didn’t go according to plan but it did wind me up on 24 hr watch until august at which point my doctor and parents gave me permission to go to […]
So I’m 19…and supposedly a girl who has the world going for me. I’m “pretty” and smart and everyone loves me.
So they tell me. When I was 11, my mom abandoned me to a city who devoured me like the storm devours ships. I was gangraped nightly, used, abused, beaten…..starved, and tied to a bed for days at a time.
I’ve suffered losing everyone close to me, either being left or God takes them from me.
I found a guy that loved me for everything I was….and man I feel hard. And I was doing okay….until May 2nd, 2014 when I lost my daughter, Dylan Michelle…at 6:30 […]
My birthday is tomorrow and I find myself researching ways to kill myself. I have felt suicidal since I was 7, yet I always convinced myself that tomorrow would be better. I have lived this lie for 19 years. I’m sick of it.
I tried to jump out of a moving car on Wednesday night. My fiance stopped me. When I thought about how horrible it would have been for him to see me like that, it made me feel so wretched.
I am an abuser. I abuse him like my parents abused me. I don’t hit him, but I hurt him with my existence. I am […]
My co-worker proposed to his stunning, sweet girlfriend tonight. On the beach. With a sparkly diamond ring. Everyone clapping and smiling. I saw her full of love, surprise, crying, and happy. “That’ll never be you” I thought to myself. Just kill me.
I met my friend’s wife. She’s a size zero with a prominent jaw line and a contagious smile. She has a presence that is quiet but powerful. She wore high heels with perfect eyebrows. “That’ll never be you” I thought to myself. Just kill me.
I saw my boss, laughing and schmoozing. She wore a long dangly silver necklace and a black tight jumpsuit that […]