I’ve lost just about everything to depression. All my friends hate me because they don’t understand…I used to play the piano and violin and draw and paint and now…I just sit around waiting for nothing. My grades have dropped a lot too. I’m surprised I’m still alive though. I wrote a suicide note, I have the pills it takes, now it’s only a matter of time.
Tag:
alive
i wanna die now! i have nobody, no body to listen to me, i dont even know how to talk about my feelings anymore. i dont know why i keep coming to these sites, its all soooo…. artificial. so mechanical, so impersonal, so dehumanizing…. and yet its all i have. unless tonights the night. my moms dying of cancer, she’ll be gone soon, i cant do that to her, not until shes gone…
but once shes passed away ill be free…. free to end my misery, free to leave this place. dont tell me to be strong, i’m stronger than most, my great strength is whats […]
First day and I still have to fight to not feel so fucking down when you’re not around. Your presence was what kept me alive. I miss you so much. Please come back ._.
The tears can’t stop coming out. I can’t stop hyperventilating.
She’s gone. I’m never going to see her again. And yet, she’s alive and well.
There is no worse feeling. I thought what I’d felt last winter was harsh. But that was nothing.
I’ve lost. I’ve lost so much. Someone help me. Someone please fucking help me.
By the time you read this again, we may or may not have been together. Somehow I feel like writing this letter to you. We have been through many things. I know you have cried a lot, lost many things, screamed a lot, and died many times. But I need you to know that you are my reason to hold on. You are my greatest treasure and everyday I pray that you will be safe, alive, and healthy. God knows how I have begged him to not let you feel alone, to give me the strength to make up to you what you have lost. […]
In your arms I became mercurial writhed like a diamond back in the bleakness of eyes that seemed sulphuric, traveling through me, in me we bathed in incense and the colour of each other danced as though invented for the moment with dark longing breathing eachother in quiet desperation and you were beautiful in your honesty and I multitudes stinging in each movement that we echoed somewhere between lives and I wish I could’ve stayed to burn alive.
Hi I’m a little afraid to do this but here it goes.
My name is destine. Lately I’ve been depressed. I think it’s just everything . that’s been going on. I don’t live with my mom and dad. My mom passed a way tho. I lost contact with most of my friends and my family. Because my aunt and uncle. They adopted us. They would be really mean. Put me and down. And a lot of other things to me and my little brother. I’ve missed my old life with my mom still alive and everything.
ive been lost not knowing what to do. I’ve cut before […]
Sorry I know it’s bad but people asked me to post it so….
I have other poems too if you want to hear them. Thanks for helping me so far.
I’m down under ground
nobody can see
they don’t notice
my true identity
I’ve been buried alive
can’t come up from under
I’m seen as lightning
but really I’m thunder
My rage is trapped
down under with me
and under ground
is where it should be
If I come up
I’ll never be the same
when I’m looked at
you’ll only see pain
I like it down here
it’s calm and quiet
above it’s loud
and a disturbing riot
If I let go
and never come back
maybe I’ll find the identity
I still sadly lack
It would put a stop
to […]
It got to the point where not even a bottle of vodka can get me to talk to my friends about my problems.I feel so damn alone,shut and distant from everyone .There are days i feel bad,angry with myself for still being alive and yet most of the time i feel nothing at all,the numb feeling took over my whole self.
Im sorry for writing this,i just had to .I know many of you have bigger problems than me and im here whining.Sorry.I hope it gets better for you.
I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing.
I already have a time, place, and means ready to go. I told myself I didn’t want to make any irreversible decisions without thinking long and hard about them, so I set up a two month moratorium which ends in less than 24 hours. This is it. This post will be my last attempt to gather contrary opinions: convince me not to go through with it, if you think it is more rational for me to stay alive.
I had a decent childhood and I was doing well in school. I was happily married. Then, one day about three years ago, I developed a migraine. It […]
With a new year approaching I can never help but to ponder. Ponder the years gone by and the year to come. I’ve gotta admit for the most part looking back I feel three emotions above all others. Pride, embarrassment and sadness. Pride at coming this far, despite picking out a go date, more than once, despite getting hold of method after method, most painless and most sure fire. Despite every descision I took that screwed my life up I somehow stayed with it. I’m gonna be proud about that if ye don’t mind. And embarrassed at the way I usto be, way back when. […]
It was so nice to see you tonight. I feel alive. I love you much. I wish you could read this. I wish you could. I really love you.
I really love him. So much.
My life has not been exactly what you would call easy. I got charged with a rape I never committed at the age of 20. It shall follow me forever as they put me on the sex offenders registry. I honestly did nothing. Life went on and I fell in love. My ex took my kids and now will not let me see them, I stayed single for a long time, finally found love again, she left me for whatever reasons she might have had. Everyone who knows me really doesn’t like me that much. Judgements and all. Everyday I am reminded of just how […]
I’m turning 19 tomorrow but I feel like my life is over. The one person who I was close to is having her funeral a few days later. No one else matters to me anymore. I’m thinking of just ending it today but I know she would’ve never forgiven me. I wish there was another way but I can’t help forming these thoughts in my head. And to think, it would be so easy. The pills are right in the other room. How hard could taking an overdose be? The only thing that’s making […]
it’s not a good start I know, but I’m on the edge. and I try and try to hold on even when I want to let go.
But, I’m torn. I’m so…torn between letting go and holding on. I’m holding on for the love that burns me whole, for the woman that held me anchored to this earth for almost six years. the more I try and show her my twisted heart the more I push her away into another’s arms. and my heart bleeds. it just makes it all the more harder to keep the promise I made her, to be there for her […]
“What now?” The first thought in mind was the last thing I thought about while waiting to die. I woke up and it was cold, dark, and dirty from not cleaning the house while in my state of misery. I got up, stumbled to get to the bathroom, and sat on the pot. I didn’t use it, just as a chair. I examined myself thoroughly through the mirror and found that my eyes were bloodshot, hair was a slight grey, and my lips were cracked. I’m an average looking guy on most days and look younger than my age presents. I’m 21 and already the […]
Should I live or die tonight? Whats the point in living? What’s the point in stayin alive when u know nothin good is going to happen. What’s the point in stayin here in this world. I’m just sick and tired of having to live like this..but I’ll believe that one day something will change my
life. I’ll wait until I can’t wait no more.
When you look at me like that, I don’t get it, I just can’t breathe at all. When you look at me like that, You make alive what I thought it was dead inside me. And all I want is learn a way of how to let you know…
Even on my good days, I can’t help wondering why I’m staying alive. I don’t enjoy much, and I don’t see myself going anywhere in life. Why even try anymore?