We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone.
** Orson Welles **
Tag:
alone
Well ever since sixth grade I have felt alone. Even though I have a best friend. half the time I don’t think she wants to be friends with me. I am getting to the point where I am close to giving up again. I cant keep feeling like a nothing. I always feel worthless and alone. I have no clue that else to do anymore. Nobody at my school likes me, so instead they pick on me and tease me. I tried telling the teachers but nothing helped or worked. I cant even ride the bus anymore because I can’t handle the teasing that happens […]
And to think that I actually believed you.
You said you wanted me, just me. Now you’re changing, and you no longer want me anymore. Yeah. Leave me. From the beginning, I’ve never left you at all. If I do so it must be because you’re busy. Or I need time alone. You left me. You said I will leave, but now you’re the one leaving. Yeah go on. I like how you lie. Yeah. Go on. Pain is addictive. Hurt me more if you can. In this relationship I’ve never pretended before. I sincerely love you with all my heart. Hah. Who knows, […]
Things haven’t been going well at all…
I just float through life, trying to hold on to something.. seemingly anything there is to try and hold on to. I don’t want to be alone..alone in my life, in how I feel, in how I think and in how I see things from my perspective. I’m not done with this life yet, I don’t want to die like this..
From my wife leaving me, and never even sending so much as a hello via….? Nothing! ..to the sudden realization of mental illness….to constantly losing my job..never being good enough..to being right out used and brutally attacked…and the permanent […]
my best friend, my second half, for years we wanted to kill ourselves together, a suicide pact. And a couple days after my birthday two years ago he hung himself. And I can’t deal with the guilt I don’t want to wait anymore to die my time is soon. I have no right to live. I just want to be with my second soul in heaven anywhere but here. I’d rather see blackness for eternity alone then to be here one more day not being with him
Common question I have been asking myself. Life is ironic . Those who wants to live dies. Those who doesn’t stays on.
Perhaps this is what discontentment is. Yup you can say I am discontented. The honest truth is that I do not see my purpose of life anymore
I am going to start my Final Year project soon. I am worried that I will pull my teammates grades down. I am worried he will end up doing all the work.
I don’t know what drove me to start this project with him. I guess I have misjudged my capabilities again. I […]
Nobody seems to understand what I’m feeling, even if someone know what I’m fighting. I’m desperately searching for someone in which I can confide. I want to talk about my feelings ’cause they’re too heavy for only one person. I feel stupid when I try to talk with someone about all I’m thinking.
I feel like a fool. Sometimes insane.
I’m so afraid of everything. I don’t want to be alone in this, but it’s so complicated and I feel like it would never end. I want to finish this story, this black long chapter of my life. It’s me that I’m really fighting?
I want someone which […]
Everyone is just an acquaintance. I can’t really connect with anyone. Being by myself minimizes the agony of being apart of this world. But even then it’s unbearable.
“No one talks to her, she feels so alone
She’s in too much pain to survive on her own
The hurt she can’t handle overflows to a knife
She writes on her arm and wants to give up her life”
When ever I hear this song this is the part when I start to cry…This pretty much perfectly describes my life and I’ve noticed it for years now. I seriously need help but I refuse to tell my parents about my depression, my mom already thinks she fucked up on raising us and I feel like telling her about it will only […]
I always trick myself into thinking that I’ll be fine alone…but that’s when the demons whisper most…
I’m still doing the best I can…but when I’m gone, how will they ever know I tried?
Today was the day that I planned to kill myself, but unfortunately my affairs won’t be completely in order until November 25th. I can’t depart from this world until all of my affairs are in order because I don’t want to leave a mess behind for people to clean up. Earlier my ex professor emailed me, and called me asking if I was okay because he felt like I wasn’t. Initially, I denied that anything was wrong, and then I broke down and told him everything. All he did was push me further to suicide because he can’t comprehend the amount […]
The past few years of my life haven’t been the best i may say, i always feel like i’m under water, like Ariel (the little mermaid) except that i can’t breath, i’m dying, gasping for hair watching all around me, people who sees me but don’t understand, people who hear the horrible sound that i make but don’t listen, people who talk about knowledge but are really ignorant to the fact that i’m gasping for hair, i’m reaching desperately for a hand that is not there.
During a long period of time i stay there not breathing but somethings was wrong really wrong, i just wouldn’t […]
I’m lost, confused; angry at myself, yet I portray my anger at others to hide my insecurities. I am a sadist, I hate it. I hate it so much, yet I can’t help it. I want to stop hurting, but I cannot control myself. I made my mother cry today. I blamed her for what I am, I blamed her for who she is. She always let’s me do whatever I want. She never says no. Nor does she ever try to stop me. Does she care? I push limits, boundaries, nothing I do phases her. I wipe my feet all over this woman and […]
Thinking about the past is one of the worst things one can do, once you are alone you start thinking about every problem and struggle you have gone through. Thinking about a situation you want to completely forget about but it will always be there no matter how much time goes by.
And it hurts, it hurts so much.
Because no one ever thinks that that situation was going to ever happen but it did and there is nothing one can really do about it.
Happiness. A word. I feel it at times, I feel a lack of it at others. I’m not always sure which one defines the word. I have been feeling as though happiness is making me feel empty lately. Maybe this isn’t happiness then. But why do I long for the hopelessness I fought so hard to escape from? Perhaps I never truly escaped. Perhaps this is just a masquerade of emotions to trick myself into living to fight another day.
Do I know who I am? Does anyone? Am I anyone? These are real questions for me. I have four distinct versions of myself. Family, girlfriend, […]
I gave myself one week for me to change my mind, and to not execute my plan to attempt suicide. The day that I planned to execute my plan, and end my life was Friday. I told myself that if anyone showed that they actually cared about me, or if someone gave me a reason to live that I wouldn’t end my life. One of my ex-college professors called my cell phone this weekend. He asked if I was okay, and said that I seemed troubled the last time that he talked to me. I immediately tried to reassure him […]
I am scared of everything and my only comfort is the comfort of idealizing suicide and yearning to cut and burn myself. I am afraid of an obligation I must fulfill tomorrow and I want to cut up my body so bad. If I cut I know it will be instant relief… BUT then I have to keep cutting. It’s a sick addiction – and I ain’t no spring chicken, I am a practiced and experienced cutter of 18years. I promised myself last month on my 31st birthday that my 30’s would be free of that kind of coping mechanism. My therapist is going to […]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9R371_c-yo
I clicked on this song yesterday while messing around on youtube. When you’re feeling alone this is a good song to listen to.
I have set a new termination date, and I plan to depart next week. Hopefully this time I do not screw up and end up still alive. I feel trapped, and that I have to make this decision. Although I have been depressed and suicidal for the past seven years, I feel as though my feelings have catalyzed within the past few weeks. I’m sick and tired of always being sick and tired. Sick and tired of being a stupid, worthless,and hated burden on those that are around me. I am nothing more than a failure. I don’t […]
I just took 15 ibuprofen . I did it because I want my parents to know I need help. I don’t want to die. I’m home alone should I call my dad to take me to the ER? PLEASE HELP I DONT WANT TO DIE 🙁