Tag:

always

The Ugly Duckling

by falling_soup 2/18/2015

written by falling_soup

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2BCI4twcXg

I am the ugly duckling. I seem to always be the odd one out. My mother never seems to approve of the friends I do make and what ever choices I do make are “Stupid” and not “Rational” because I am a teenager. I think that it is okay to make the decisions that I learn lessons from. I am safe and I don’t make the decisions that are unsafe. (most of the time) I seem to be a “good girl” because I don’t do drugs or drink or what ever people define as a “teen at risk”. I don’t judge people I try to […]

2/18/2015 0 comment

Well. This is me.

by Samnelson 2/18/2015

written by Samnelson

THIS IS A LONG READ, I UNDERSTAND IF YOU DONT GET THROUGH IT. BUT YOU WILL NOT REGRET READING IT IF YOU DO.

Hey. So like I guess I wanna past this as a suicide survivor. And say that life. Life has always been shit. And who am I to tell anyone to, or not to do anything, like, I myself have done almost everything that you could think of that someone who was not within it would not understand, drugs, self harm, I’m diegnosed Ana, smoking, drinking, and you know what every day of my life I still tell others not to do any of […]

2/18/2015 1 comment

Some day I will be able to..

by falling_soup 2/17/2015

written by falling_soup

Some day I will be able to:

Be free
Live on my own
Be who I want to be
Live far away from my mom
Be happy?

Let’s be real, I will never be happy. I can never be free because I am trapped to my mentally ill mother. I am all alone. My stomach is in knots and I can’t seem to stop the anxiety and the emotions that come with the thought of killing myself. I will never be able to “stomach” the situation that for the last 16 years I have been put through. My life is never going to change. I am trying to do the best […]

2/17/2015 5 comments

What should I do?

by ahannah123 2/16/2015

written by ahannah123

15 16 in march I’ve been depressed cutting suicidal I cut on the 11th thinking of doing it again mean family my dad hit me with a belt because I drank some of his wine because I was depressed I am lonely for the most part 2/3 good friends but not always there. I was planning on killing myself in october on a cruise I don t know how to swim 6 months away. I stopped taking my depression meds they don t work and made me gain 40IB my dad still wants me to take it I have counseling twice a month I was […]

2/16/2015 8 comments

A song i wrote about a small part of my life

by maxwell 2/15/2015

written by maxwell

I’ll take you back to a place unseen,
Back when I was just wee lil teen,
I know this might seem hard to believe in,
But there’s a side of me ya all ain’t seein’,
Dads never home, nether is my mother
never sees nether ever since they split
growing up in a world so alone and so fragile
Way too many friends, only talked to a few of them,
The rest don’t even want anything to him,
He found a girl when he was just fourteen,
who would have thought it be all a bad dream,
Was going good dating for a solid two […]

2/15/2015 0 comment

Fiction

by HereticBlood 2/14/2015

written by HereticBlood

Days are exhausting and nights drag on.. You haunt my mind and lerk in my memory. I can never seem to get you to leave. As hard as I try to wish you away i know you’ll always be haunting me.. Broken and numb empty to the core

2/14/2015 1 comment

Buried alive

by nozmoking 2/14/2015

written by nozmoking

I’ve always had two insurmountable fears. First is the fear of drowning, and second is the fear of being buried alive. When I was a kid I was deathly afraid of dying in a falling elevator but I outgrew that for some reason. Lately though I have been feeling like I have been buried alive. Trapped in a dark, silent coffin in a concrete burial vault beneath six feet of cold, hard dirt. I can kick, I can scream until my tonsils bleed (oh wait, I don’t have any tonsils), I can pound and scratch until my fingers are bloodied and all that I can […]

2/14/2015 2 comments

Happy Valentine’s Day

by Matt 2/13/2015

written by Matt

Okay, so where I am, there isn’t long until it’s officially Valentine’s day 2015. Personally I hate the holiday, it only serves to make a lot of people miserable, myself included.

I know a lot of people are on SP because they feel alone but I want to let anyone reading this know…

I love you, and I always will no matter what. I’ll always listen if you need me to.

2/13/2015 7 comments

living here will be the death of me

by 12ccht 2/12/2015

written by 12ccht

My mother resents me so much. She always has. I was always the reble, the introvert, the undesirable fat one, whenever the family was dressed for an occasion, I was left home alone. So many nights I wished somebody would’ve just broken in and murdered me. Now I know for a fact my mothers life would be ideal without me. Her words tear me apart. I want to fix myself and lose weight and be confident for once in my life but she could care less. I hate living like this. I wish someone would end my miserable life, I would be erased and forgotten […]

2/12/2015 1 comment

i just found this site while surfing ways to kill myself…

by raj143 2/11/2015

written by raj143

i just found this site while surfing ways to kill myself… i am so fed up with my life so i am quiting it by killing myself my GF thinks that i dont have faith on her and i am bad guy and my thinking also cheap… i never use any bad things to her, always loyal to her, give my all time to her but after listening these words from her my heart is full broken and wanna end myself so that one day she realise how much i love her.. thanks everyone for supporting me..and sorry for those who loved me …GOODBYE

2/11/2015 2 comments

by cathy arsis 2/10/2015

written by cathy arsis

The evil that is in the world almost always comes of ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding.

2/10/2015 11 comments

Anything

by Here we are 2/10/2015

written by Here we are

Hello,

I am sure that all of you have heard your share of troubles, so I will spare the details. Suffice to say that I need a reason to continue on. I have been up and down, and lower. One of my shrinks always tells me that you can only feel as high as you have been low. . .I have yet to submerge into that euphoria. I struggle to find any real reason to continue on. What is the point? Share a couple laughs with others? Live a monotonous; day to day life. I’ve traveled, performed for people from just about every class level, studied, […]

2/10/2015 4 comments

please help me?

by joles4 2/10/2015

written by joles4

Hello, I am new here.. I’m really not too sure if anyone will see this but it is my only shot.

Since I was younger, I haven’t really had any friends. I have always tried to sit next to a group of people, but I have never fit. I seem off hanging with other people. I try to seem not lonely, but it doesn’t work. I have been bullied for 5 years, by people I have never spoken to, i really wish i was intelligent as the other people at my school, but i’m not.

a lot of people talk behind my back, and I’m really not […]

2/10/2015 12 comments

Lonely

by azalearose 2/9/2015

written by azalearose

heres my story:

I am an 18 year old girl with very few friends. I just dropped out of college and moved back in with my mom because I have no where else to go. I dropped out of college because I fucked up my grades. I’ve never had many friends, I went to 4 high schools because I was always moving.

My mom and I fight a lot. I found a job but I have no one to hang out with. It’s depressing. I am tall, slim and pretty with long hair. I am super shy and it’s hard for me to talk to people. Guys […]

2/9/2015 3 comments

The matrix

by shygal79 2/8/2015

written by shygal79

Hey, I’m pretty fed up right now.

I never talk about me, I suppose in that sense I’m a bit of a martyr, always trying to please others and sacrificing my own life in the running. Im pretty lonely if honest, I have 3 children, and a partner. But I’m not happy, I have no lust for life.

Ive always been cheeky and outgoing, and flirtatious but straight talking, I’ve never played games with people. I’ve always cared for everyone and I feel like I think differently from others.

It’s like I’m in an alternate world at times, were my views and values in life are completely different to others […]

2/8/2015 2 comments

I feel so selfish…

by JustLauren 2/5/2015

written by JustLauren

Sometimes I can’t help but think that depression is such a selfish thing. A logical part in my brain tells me that ‘it’s a chemical imbalance’, but the self-hating part of me tells me I’m a horrible person. I mean, there are starving people out there, people without homes. I have a home (though sometimes I struggle to pay rent) and I don’t usually starve, though I am now. No money to pay bills and pay for food and whatnot. But anyhow, that’s really the extent of my worries. Money and some life decisions I’ve made recently. And I know my poor upbringing doesn’t help […]

2/5/2015 2 comments

Still in a Dark Place

by the12thdreamcatcher 2/4/2015

written by the12thdreamcatcher

Hi, this is my first post, so I thought I should tell you guys about my story…….

My parents both are a little messed up, my mother has OCD and Major Depressive Disorder. My dad has PTSD, that has made him turn to drug addiction. My parents both smoke marajuana (which is sadly, legal in our state) and that ended in my siblings and I being split up and put in different various foster homes. Since about two years ago I started self-harming (burning) and I have had two suicide attempts. After my first suicide attempt my families court case got closed and everyone returned home. […]

2/4/2015 1 comment

Silence

by Stormadriel 2/4/2015

written by Stormadriel

I have been in a lot of abusive relationships, and until now, I’ve always been able to fight my way to freedom.

But now…

I’ve developed Conversion Aphonia… meaning, because of the trauma I’ve suffered, the emotional, physical and sexual abuse, my voice… will no longer be there…

I can’t speak. I can’t laugh. I can’t even try. No matter how much I try, my body will not let me make a sound.

What am I supposed to do now?

2/4/2015 1 comment

Protected: Adeus, finalmente.

by Tristeza 2/4/2015

written by Tristeza

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

2/4/2015 7 comments

Grim Circles

by LadyAtronach 2/4/2015

written by LadyAtronach

I’m very new to this site, I was searching for something a lot darker than this forum, and ended up finding this instead.

I relapsed the other night – hard – in every sense of the word. I began drinking again, I sliced my arms up, watching as the blood from my new wounds uncovered marks I made long ago; when I claimed I was done cutting and everything else the first time.

I hate this, I mean, I really loathe falling back into the same hole I promised I’d never find myself in again! But it’s whatever. I end up dead tomorrow, and nothing else would change. […]

2/4/2015 22 comments

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