I’ve been living with illness all my life. Started with asthma when I was young. 3rd grade I was put into the ICU for an asthma attack. They kept me awake with albuterol and doing arterial sticks every hour. Slightly traumatized me. It continued through high school. Then I developed stomach issues as well as a curve in my spine known as Sherman’s Disease. I started eating ibprophen like it was candy. Pneumonia and bouts of pleurisy followed me through my mid 20’s. In my mid 20’s I developed IBS. The gastro doctor, who is also my fathers, thought I had chrons like my father. […]
Asthma
wouldnt it be a shame if I were to stop my asthma medication?
Wouldnt it be a shame to just stop all medication and let things take their course?
But then there’s the constant argument… Would it be suicide because I know what will happen? Or will it be merely an intentional accident because I don’t know when it’s going to happen?
I guess it’s the uncertainty in that argument that’s the only thing holding me back.
I started out in a hell hole. I was born to a family that was a mix of two. One brother from my mother and one from my father. The one that lived with us was James (names have been changed). I was two and james was 10. So, one day our parents up and left. James had to look after me for about a week I think. When they came back, they were mad. The mother threw me into a window. My brother tried to protect me and ended up getting all his fingers bent backwards for it. Next door heard the screaming and […]
First let me star off by saying that I am not planning on committing suicide right now. I just do not want to get to that point. I do not know how to express what I am feeling, but I will try to the best of my ability to describe it. I just feel lost, I do not want to do anything anymore. I do not want to move anymore, but I do not want to stay still. I want to live, but I do not want to keep trying to endure this suffering. I have a good family and great friends, just my views […]
If I was to cut myself up and die that would be suicide… Yes.. Hanging.. Yes.. Suffocating myself.. Yes.. But what if I stopped taking my asthma and blood pressure meds?.. Would that be a careless accident or would I be tarnished with the suicide brush?..
Up untill 2008 life was going great. 21 living life at the full and with a good idea of what I wanted to do.
May 2008, My Grandad died suddenly and then from September I went to Uni in Newcastle but failed in May 2009. Since then my life has taken for the worst. Got asthma that effects me especially in the cold weather that makes me hard to breath a lot of the time. I am now failing at another university in the South East England and now being 25 it is hard to find a job with these reccesson that the uk is  in
I have been thinking about […]
So, I’ve gone through a lot lately, I was enrolled to college out of high school, as are most people these days.
I was promised a job, a house, a roof over my head, and all the things that go a long with moving from one parent to another.
As soon as I made the journey from my Grandparents to my fathers, I knew something wasn’t right though.
The job my father had promised me, it never existed.
Even after not dropping a dime to child support for the last 18 years of my life, he still complained when there was another person under his roof.
The second I couldn’t […]
Over a year a go, I went to a doctor just to talk to someone. I was just having one of those of days, that was all. I was never depressed. Anyway, she gave me these tablets that were citalopram without explaining what they were, how long I should take them for or when it would be reviewed. She didn’t even explain why she thought I should be on them in the first place. All she said was if it was me, i would take them. I had been taking these tablets from October 2010-November 2011 without knowing what they were. This was a trainee […]
My life is so miserable because my parents are separated and my mom and dad doesn’t care about me anymore…. and I am so ugly that my classmates always laugh at my face and nobody wants to befriend with me because im ugly.I dont have friends and i am very poor and everybody hates me because im too shy to befriend with them and they always tease me and embarass me infront of my classmates.When i look at the mirror i always cry because im so ugly that nobody wants to be with me even my parents laugh at may face, im an outcast.I always […]
Well, I’ve been sick all my life, asthma, allergies, skin diseases, mental issues, social issues. I was always a quiet kid and didn’t have many friends. My dad use to spoil me as a kid because I was youngest and always sick, I believe, until I started noticing that my sister wasn’t getting the fair attention, so I asked to stop. And he did. In school I was made fun of as a kid, then later I just became awkward to talk too. I was never considered one of the pretty girls. Boys only talked to be to get with my friends or my sister. […]
It’s something I use to think of a lot.
Sometimes I still do.
I met this boy, in one of my classes, and we were just talking. Somehow suicide etched its words into our conversation. He told me, “If you tell someone, you want to be stopped.” For me..that was true. I told my Dad. I cried in the car and told him everything.
When I was a kid, there are some things I can’t remember. I was crazy..wild. My Mom let me do whatever I wanted. I had a little sister. She suffered from a severe case of asthma. My mom did drugs..all kinds […]
I am a 59 year old male who just wants to go to sleep for a very very very long time….forever would be nice. I just want to die in my sleep, without experiencing any pain.
If I were to die right now, I could honestly say I have lived my life to the fullest given certain constraints. You see, I was born with very bad asthma back in 1949. Back in the 50s, doctors didn’t know what to do with us children with asthma. So they made us stay in our beds, put a big piece of plastic over the bed, and pump in oxygen. […]