They say it’s going to get better. It isn’t. People who say it’s better to be alone than have bad company, have never truly been alone. They Don’t know how much it hurts. It hurts so much, I just want to rip my skin off so I can stop feeling it. One day, when I stop being a coward, I will be able to do it, and I will finally have peace and all the pain will go away. Life is too ugly for me to bear. People are too mean and I’m too stupid to not believe their lies.
Well world you get a chance to laugh yet again. Finally being home after tricking the dr’s in to think your ok…bravo on my wonderful production of “I am truly ok. It was an accident…No I didn’t want to kill myself.” Even if I would have had the courage to say “YES it was an attempt.” I was to embarrassed by the fact that I cant even kill myself right. What kind of fucked up thing is that. I truly thought that after a couple of months in a hospital bed that my own bed would feel nice. But it doesn’t, it feels worse […]
I didn’t tell anyone that I was depressed. I didn’t know how. If you were a parent and your twelve year old daughter said she was depressed would you believe her? I wouldn’t, especially since I usually come across as the happiest of the children. When I finally worked up the courage to tell my mom, my timing couldn’t have been worse. It was the night before mothers day, and I let out all I had hidden. I opened up, I cried and confessed. I told her everything, right down to wishing the house would burn down with me along with it. I was so […]
hi i dont really know where to start but i guess i can start by saying im suicidal. ive been depressed for a long time and im still not sure why. i really wish i could have the courage to tell someone but i dont . im too scared they’ll make fun of me or will worry too much and i dont want that. i really know i need help but im just not sure why im so scared to tell. my dad is so understanding that he could help and my mom could help too i just dont know… i also dont know why […]
I’m going to try and give my story the best way I can. I haven’t been on this Earth for a very long time, and I’ve been plagued by problems (but not as much compared to come of the posts I’ve read on here). I started having suicidal thoughts when I was about 10, and I’ve had them ever since. I started having them because I was being bullied very badly at school. My Mother (who is going to appear many times in this story), also picked on me but not as bad. Fast forward 2 years from then, I started getting homeschooled, and my […]
I want to kill myself.
Awww why you have a perfectly… almost perfectly good life. You’re just going through a bit of a rough time hang in there, its going to get better.
Its not going to get better, I’ve been wanting and waiting for it get better for how many years now… I can’t say I can predict the future but I’ve been understanding my feelings, my death wish, and I want to dies more than ever. I say more than ever, but I cant clearly remember all the reasoning, the beliefs, the crap that led to this point but I can say with confidence that […]
Do you have someone you know personally, or a role model/possible celebrity figure whose suicide or death you admire? Sometimes, I think of the deaths of others to help build up courage in the fact they could go through with it. You could either be inspired by the method itself or the components of their life surrounding the death.
For example: I often think of Gary Stewart who was a 70’s country singer from where I live. He had some good hits in his day, reaching the top of […]
This is my first time posting on here, and I would like to read some first hand accounts of hospitalization after a suicide attempt, or being hospitalized for threatening to do so. I would like to know whether you feel it helped you or made you feel worse. Were you diagnosed with a mental illness and do you still want to kill yourself?
I’ll start…
Bought components for helium bag online last fall (live in a small town so it was easier to find online). I suppose I was acting a little too disconnected from others and my boyfriend caught on before I could summon the courage to […]
I wrote a post on here earlier this week saying should I tell the people who bullied me how I wasn’t going to do it but after talking with a friend of mine she gave me a valid point and said: i think this is a really good idea you have to speak out b/c a lot of people whose being bullied or bullied don’t really speak out and they hide their feelings inside and no one really know the whole truth and if you do it at least you did something to prevent this from happening to other people and that this took courage. I did […]
If I was just a bit skinnier.. Just a bit smarter.. Just a bit funnier.. Maybe, just maybe, she’d like me more then him.. But I’m not. And she doesn’t.
Just the thought of her with him makes me wanna overdose on my antidepressants. She is my world. My everything. And my everything has left and now I’ve got nothing. Which leads me to believe there’s nothing left to live for. Nothing to let go. So why the fuck is it so fucking hard to do so?
Why can’t I walk away from nothing when my everything just walked away from me? Why can’t I just […]
Right now, the only thing that’s keeping me alive is the fact that any kind of suicide attempt has a potentially devastating chance of failure. Pills, guns, jumping… everything terrifies me. I keep having flashes of how disastrously each kind of attempt could go, and I don’t have the courage to try any of them. I wish I was less scared of pain. I thought pills would work for a while. I thought sleeping pills would put you to sleep and then kill you gently in your sleep! Can you believe how naive I was? Then I read about how they make you puke, and […]
I have a lot of admiration for many of you who can actually go through the act of attempting suicide. I have wanted to since I was 7 years old and have not had the courage. I am now 53 and still a woos. I suppose what it boils down to is that I really don’t want to kill myself but to be put out of my misery. Don’t get me wrong. I have come very close a time or two and someday I may just get that courage to succeed. I have lived with myself for many years and all I know is that […]
How do I even begin to explain the way that I am feeling?
It’s a sense of emptiness;
A sense that you would care not to have.
I have no drive or motivation to do anything.
I’m sick of living the life that I have.
Sick of living in this body of mine.
I can’t seem to get out of this rut.
I can only wish that I were someone else.
Wish that I was happy, but doing that gets me nowhere.
I have no destination.
My future is unknown.
I just want to disappear.
I want to eliminate my life, but I’m scared of the unknown.
I just wish I had the desire to live and the […]
Hey, I’m new here. I wrote in my profile about my situation. I’m partially paralyzed from a spinal cord fracture due to a bicycle accident.
I went from being a buf, muscled and toned gym rat to having shriveled arms hanging from bony shoulders, walking like I’m drunk and
needng help with everything, dresing, showering, toilet, etc. I don’t want to live this way any more.
I’ve worked hard in phys therapy and exercise to try to regain my abilities, but it’s closing in on 18 months, and
that’s when spinal cord injuries stop healing. So I’m pretty much stuck the way I am for […]
I stopped taking my meds.By the end of the month i will have enough.I just hope i get the courage to go all the way.In the past ive been scared and gotten help.dont know why i keep doing that?although im pretty sure theyd let me bleed to death at the hospital.Ive been there to many times for them to care.I remember taking my psych meds and i almost suffocated.Funny how just when your dying instinct kicks in and you fight to live.Damn i wish i could stop doing this already.But the crazy side of me just wants to keep trying.Who knows if ill die this […]
I was at a bar tonight with some friends. They were there to have fun, i just wanted to drink my sorrows away. All my mistakes, my fuck-ups. Trying to forget about how im failing at this sick game called life. I was thinking how nobody else understands me, how alone I feel. I know some people know what Im going through, but nobody here. I was just crowd watching, watching how happy everyone is. Feeling how sad I am. Then I saw a gorgeous girl walk by. I was just checkin her out, knowing how far out of my league she is. Then i […]
I feel like everywhere, every day I’m constantly being lied about how much others care for me being alive. Deep down no one really cares what happens to me. It’s all a lie. Everyone is a hypocrite. They act as they care because they’ve been taught to do so. I feel like no one can help me or more like no one wants to do anything. I know I shouldn’t expect others to do what I can’t do for myself, but it would just be easier if people would support the only options I have left. I want to die.
No one is there for me […]
Like the title says, this is just a rant about my trials and tribulations. I don’t really know if posting my story will be of any use to anyone but I just couldn’t leave this world without anyone knowing about it. I guess someone should know, even if they don’t really know me. But in all honesty I don’t know if anybody really knows the real me. I wear a mask and pretend to be “normal”. So nobody really knows. They’ll probably never find out either because this page doesn’t link to me in any way. But I figured somebody should know my story and […]
I have hundred’s of reasons to die, and almost none to live (zero that matter).
Where do I find the courage? Get drunk, drop some pills? I do have a loaded gun in mouth, so that part is OK.
I wish I have the courage to suicide.
I don’t have any purpose to live.
I want to exchange my life to someone less fortunate than me.
I believe they will be very happy and would cherish all the things I have.
They will use my life to the fullest and give back to the society.
I will be living in their life, rotting by the streets & waiting to die.
That’s one wish of mine.