Just a dumb rant for the day.
Tag:
cut
I don’t understand why I let her in again. It took less than 24 hours for me to fall back under her spell. I have no power in this relationship- I never have. When I left her ten months ago, I slowly started to gain my self-confidence and independence back. But four days ago, I let her back into my life. I am weak again, and I just want her to hold me and run her fingers through my hair. I am so close to my 1000th day of not self-harming, and I have not stopped thinking about cutting […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I’ve been so angry for the past two days and I don’t really know why, I just have this rage inside me that’s extremely hard to control. I’m becoming more violent and my already small amount of patience is dwindling to nothing. All day I’ve felt like punching a wall, or punching someone. My skin feels tingly when I’m angry and I’m not gonna lie, it feels good. I feel like I’m invincible and like no one can touch me. Three nights ago, my girlfriend temporarily disabled her Instagram account and I was really worried and I spiraled down so fast, and ever since that […]
Fuck this life, man…
Fuck it all… Not even dope can help me heal now… It’s all clear, I’m not meant to live in this world, or any other for that matter…
I hate it when I have to wake up in the morning… Sleeping without any dreams is so peaceful… If death is like that, I want to die. There may be no turning back, but I don’t want to ever wake up again. All I want is to sleep. An eternal sleep, and nothing more. Is that too much to ask of this sadistic world? Perhaps it is…
Because of my new part-time job (as a […]
Hi I’m celina, I am 14 years old, and I have a problem And I think I need help. It all started four years ago ,I was 11 at that time in 6th grade. In the mid way of the school year ending, I thought about cutting . I thought it would be a very odd for some one to cut them self , and I want to know why and how does it feel and what do you use? All question in my head so I did at least try it. I used a pin and well no blood just a white line , […]
It’s been over 3 weeks since I last hurt myself. Last night, I felt so shitty all I wanted to do was pick up my scalpel blades and slash away at my thighs. I thought I should read a few stories about other people who self-harm. I really want to stop, but I just can’t.
I sat in my bed with the blade in my hand. The stories I had read started playing out in my head. I felt the shit I think I’m in is nothing compared to what other people are going through. But I still wanted to cut.
Usually, cutting makes me […]
the same end after any fight
tried to be a hero smash the bad guy , so guess what
back to cut again back to cry back to anger back to be a suicidal again ..! it’s not a big surprise I guess .. maybe just its who I am
a smashed one
I am so tempted to cut my rivers and let myself drown.
Hello loves, i need a little advice. So I was in class today when I noticed dozens of lines of something on my thighs… my cut marks bled through my jeans. I really don’t need my parents questioning what they are, and they are my favorite pants. Any recommendations?
So um im Natalie and i dont really know what to write so i think i will just list a few facts about myself!
-bipolar
-used to cut
-smokes weed rarely
-ive been drunk once
-brother with down-syndrome
-no father
-tried to commit suicide 7 times
-absent mother
-no one to talk to
-cares for my three brothers by myself
-16
I love it- the way it sweeps over my skin in sheets and washes away what was before. I love the way it coldness bites into my skin and makes me forget everything for a little while. I love the way it smells- the wet earth and trees; it smells like what life should smell like.
On the other hand, I hate it- all I want to do it cut myself away into nothing…
Who knew water falling from the sky would be so thought provoking lol
Sorry if this makes any of you sad, lovelies. I just had to get it off my chest 🙁 I hope […]
I have felt all day like I needed to cut or do something to make me feel better, the feelings and thoughts are making me feel like I have no where to go and no one to talk to..I keep it bottled up and I keep to myself and now I am trying to make it through the day and all I want to do is hurt myself. I feel like I am pathetic and a looser. I just need someone to talk to… is there anyone out there? or am I just trapped in the dark….
My hands are trembling. I really want to, but it is wrong. I should’nt feel like this. It is wrong. Which sane person gets pleasure from pain. Self inflicted pain. But it sets me free. It sets my soul free atleast for a while. And the scars lighten and disappear eventually. It’s not like i am murdering someone or even commiting suicide. It helps me put things in perspective. My mind isn’t clouded anymore. I forget my sorrow and pain. The emotional pain. It disappears. The sting takes over all that I am feeling. I can cope with it. Yes. I know I want to. […]
PAINNNNNNNNN! WITHOUT LOVEEEEEEEE! LIKE IT ROUGH! FUCK THIS SHIT ! FUCK EVERYTHING! FUCK EXISTENCE! WHERE ARE YOU GOD? WHY DO I FEEL SO FUCKING GUILTY FOR MY PARENTS MISTAKES AND ABOUT OTHERS? WHY DO I THINK MORE ABOUT THE OTHERS AND THEN ABOUT ME? FUCK THIS SHIT! PAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! NONE CARES ABOUT YOU! .. WHAT’S THE POINT? what’s the point…
World is crazy
Not always bothered about us
Humans animals
Today is a lonely day for me
Sitting in the gallows of shadow
This is the type of day I call for knife
My friend
Listening to sad song
That express my sorrow and loneliness
I make one cut second and than third
And i sit bleeding
Reflecting on my life
Trying to figure out the meaning
Life
Death
What’s the point of it
As the day ends
I give my life another chance
So I’ve been feeling a lot better lately than I have in years [Thank you my lovelies 🙂 ], however I still possess a strong urge to cut. And I really, really, really want to nip this habit in the bud. I am tired of leaving blood marks on my sheets and my jeans and my sweaters; I have tried replacing it with different activities (writing, jamming out to my favorite tunes) but my mind just goes back to it. Any suggestions? I am all ears.
All the papers and forms will be signed, witnessed and notarized on Sunday. I’m going to have to decide if I have the courage to go through with jumping. I am sick to my stomach with loneliness today. And I physically ache.
It’s time to cut my losses and move on. Monday I leave for the bridge.
Why do I feel nothing?
I just can’t find the energy or motivation for anything anymore, not even to cut.
I don’t think this is just me, but I’m not sure. Yesterday, I was having quite an excellent day. I am a pretty darn busy person, so being able to have some down time in my room was cool. I didn’t really have anything to do- and all the sudden, all I wanted to do was cut. I tried to run away from the feeling so I went to the gym to run it off. I came home, and was yet again consumed by the desire to cut. I wasn’t sad, depressed, or angry- it was just a reoccurrence of an old habit. Unfortunately, I […]