Hey guys,
I am in a rut right now.
I am neither happy nor sad.
Not motivated.
But at the same time i wanna do something.
Like, what the fuck?
I don’t care at all but care a lil too much.
I want to hate a girl i love to forget her.
Like everything i do contradicts something else.
Tag:
everything
I have become so so depressed and I really do not know what else to do I know i can count on 2 of my friends to open up too and my mom and shit but still I feel so lonely,im also currently going througha break up after beinng woth my boufriend for the past 2 years and i cant even explain how empty i am without him, fulll of rage and hurt though i don’t show it often. My social abilities are so fucking weak and i hate it,and i hate how bad my anxiety is. It almost physically hurts, it feels as if […]
I can’t stand it anymore. I can’t live like this, with my depression. I don’t think I was meant to be happy. How am I supposed to keep going?? What’s the point. I hate everything. What am I supposed to do with my life? Seriously.
Sometimes I’d just like someone to listen and not judge. I may be crazy but this is tearing me apart. My fiancee, his ex-girlfriend keeps finding a way to bring herself into our relationship. And it’s not even her doing it. You see when I first got with my fiancee, all he did was talk about her.. but I could understand that because they had been together for five years.. He then stopped talking about her when he figured out it bothered me. He now, never speaks of her or anything affiliated with her. It could be because I’m human and overthink […]
Tomorrow I start my fifth year of college.
Yikes.
This year I finish degree #1. I student teach in the spring, and in the fall I do…everything else. I’m overwhelmed to say the least. I’m saddled with things I have to do and missing opportunities that I wanted to have due to factors I have no control over. I feel as if I’ve lost control of my life, but I don’t know if I was ever in control to begin with.
This summer has felt like a blur. I’ve let people down and felt the world crumble around my feet. I’ve spent days upon days in bed, feeling […]
I’m 30 and never had a boyfriend- never had anyone say they like me or ask me out. I have tried everything (and “nothing), I went to a big college, graduate school, tried online dating and really worked at it, I have hobbies and friends. I’ve tried EVERYTHING, but I just can’t connect.
It seems so easy for other girls, and I’m losing friendships now that all my close friends are married, and my coworkers, too. I feel like this is never going to change and that my life is a big mistake.
After another failed Saturday night out, I feel totally hopeless. My family, my job, […]
They die or metastasize in the soul. It all depends. We either foster these gender roles that are completely and utterly wrong and bullshit and hold to ideals that were past down from lesser ideologies. I think that goes for suicide as well. If someone really and truly wants to die then who is somebody to tell them otherwise. We may offer an alternate choice and our personal salvation but it is totally up to that soul to accept or reject and continue following their own path. We have such deep belief systems either rooted in religion or even the general societal attitude towards death […]
So.. they told me I’m cancer free, and YES I’m so happy for it, I’m still dealing with my depression and anxiety problems but everything is working well.. I guess.
I met this guy, he’s like me. Depression, anxiety and Schizophrenia is what we have in common. I love him, I’m so in love with him that makes me sad, because he’s giving up and I don’t know what to do. Everything I say or I do is for nothing because he doesn’t care, and he don’t care the fact that it was hard for me too and I’m dealing with it.. and he doesn’t believe, […]
So you see, I used to have this boyfriend. He was practically my savior. He was the reason I didn’t commit suicide the first time. But he was one of a kind. He took interest in what I liked, he always supported me. He never pressured me and he was fun. He not once mentioned anything passed kissing so it never got awkward between us. He legitimately cared. Then one day he tells me he has to break up with me cuz of his father. Now here’s my problem. Everything reminds me of him and I still love him and miss him. All week I’ve […]
*this poem is in a book i read its called wattpad love i wanted to share it*
The Girl and the Shark
Once upon a time, in the middle of the
[…]
If you had the one chance to meet your past self, may it be your 5-year old or 12-year old, or your last year self, which age would it be? And what would you tell him/her?
For me, if I could meet my 12 year old self, I would tell her,
“Be happy. There’s no need to be so sad… It won’t solve anything nor is it of any use. Smile, because everything will be just fine. When you’re as big as me you’ll look back and realize the beauty is much more meaningful compared to the pain.”
I don’t know what I’m supposed to do about it. Everything feels like it’s falling apart.
Soooo this is my first post thingy so no hate unless its at least funny and please comment your own thoughts.
I wanna start out by saying how weird life is and how unbelievably random it could be, but also how planed it ends up being. Like if I make a good choice to hang out with my first friend which goes into a bad decision of doing drugs, which leads to a path with fake friends. Then of course ended up here at block one with no friends just to start all over.
But I cant help to say that I kinda liked that part of my […]
I feel like it’s time. But I don’t want it to be. I made a promise to myself, you see. I promised to wait until I was 21 to find something to live for.
Even though I really want to wait, I’m just tired. Waiting is probably the best way to describe my life and I feel like I can’t take it. Also, my head hurts all the time, without apparent reason. I don’t want to feel pain anymore, but I don’t want others to suffer because of me.
I’ve always prefered to be hurt if that means that someone doesn’t. Maybe that didn’t make […]
U know dont you?how is to be pressured
Im lost, when i has 8 i promissed to myself that i would live at least to 20
My family has never seen me crying, i have holding it for years u know?
I have 18 now… but, im so afraid of living, everything is soo hard to me handle alone
Ive trying until now, im thinking in finally give me the eternal dream
Oh God forgive me…
Its better like this, ive never been strong enough.
?????
I have had the worse five months of my life; anxiety, bdd, everything has destroyed me and who I am. I look fucking 10 years older. I think it is time for me to go; the only comfortable thought I have: Suicide.
Why go on living ?
So I got my beer on Thursday. It was cooers light so it wasn’t as strong as I wanted. Around midnight, I decided that I’m gonna see if I could commit suicide by train. Drunk, I walked to the railroad tracks then headed right down them, waiting for a train to come. My love was on the phone with me the entire time. I fell several times during all this. With no train in sight, I began sobering up enough to were I didn’t think I could go though with it and decided to go to my dads instead (which was on the way). I […]
I feel completely broken inside, like a part of me that should be there is missing. I’m constantly surrounded by a dark cloud that suffocates me. I feel like it should have killed me already. I’m surprised it hasn’t. It’s so hard to live with so much pain. My friends don’t understand – the few that I’ve told about it. They think that chocolate and hugs will make it all better. It won’t.
The truth is that I want to disappear. Except I can’t. The problem with having a perfect-on-paper life is that: a) people don’t believe that you could possibly have any problems, and b) […]
There must be some way to control your state of mind. Sometimes I get adrenaline rushes and feel like nothing matters and feel great, other times (like now) everything feels heavy and depressing. basically I am suffering because I can’t stop looking at suicide as a tragic event that will hurt everyone badly, including myself. How can I make it so I stop looking at it that way and instead develop an adventurous/relaxed and eager mindset for suicide? I want to stop feeling the intense guilt, regret, melancholy, and anxiety that comes with this. I’ve read and think lots of people here would “benefit” from […]
Why movies are better than reality ? Why movie is better than reality ? Why reality is boring ?
by niki
written by niki
Why movies are better than reality / real life / real world ?
Why movie is better than reality / real life / real world ?
Why reality is boring ?
What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality ( human’s fantasy is better than reality )
for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, X-Men, Marvels & DC universe / movies , The Avengers , Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, Naruto, Bleach, […]