and i don’t know why. my boyfriend is great, I have a decent job and family, and I just feel worthless and want to die again what’s the point
Tag:
feel
Okay so we have broke up its been a week and a bit and did we just spend the night together? you in my arms, feeling your heartbeat on my chest stroking your cheek, your neck, you. Why do I let this happen to us? I don’t know how you feel but I feel nothing just frozen in place remembering how we kissed and how soft your face was. I need to know was there any feeling? I DON’T EVEN KNOW ANY MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
For anyone who has seen a psychiatrist, therapist, etc, what have they done for you? Does it really make you feel that much better? Or do you have to go on meds to feel any different?
maybe there is a chance to change to feel better to be happy
but how do i prove to someone that i can ??
how do i prove it to me??
still feeling lost …
I’m never good enough for my dad, and he doesn’t care what happens to me. My girlfriend of 1 and a half years doesn’t even act like were together. I barely survived my first semester of college. I’ve delved into a depression. I’ve become so socially withdrawn I go days without talking. I stay in my room all day. I sleep for around 12 hours a night because I have nothing to wake up for. This is the last night I’ll feel like this.
I’ve been on several websites for suicide now. All forums. I suppose I keep coming to search for something. Maybe a reply that says it’s okay. I’m an atheist, so I don’t want to hear anything that has to do with your Jesus, Allah, etc. I also don’t want to hear anything about waiting longer for shit might actually change in two, three, or ten years. I’ve been depressed since I was in middle school. I’m 21 now. It started when I was a child. It’s obviously the cause for my stupidity to begin with. My childhood was filled with many forms of abuse. My […]
Hi my name is niecy I’ve struggled with depression ever since I was 14 but was not diagnosed until I was 15 I have struggled with depression and let alone bipolar disorder for a long time I’ve struggled with mental anguish its been a long struggle I need help and I’m getting help but I can no longer hide how I feel I think about dying sometimes and sometimes I feel I’m alone ever since highschool I was alone I didn’t have many friends and I still don’t but who cares in this world I guess the loners are here to not make friends I […]
One day…I hope to not feel rejected or unwanted by people I love.
And the Christmas music in this waiting room is going to drive me back to the ward.
Bah Humbug.
im sitting here and have a blank mind i feel numb spaced out like if my life moves on and im part of nothing around me disconnected completely from the world yet im sitting here at work
Life is not fair / unfair. there is always winners & losers. I’m a loser, so why can’t I / losers just commit suicide?
by niki
written by niki
Life is not fair.
Life is unfair.
there is always winners & losers.
there will always be winner & loser.
so why can’t I / losers just commit suicide?
rather than they keep living chasing & fixing all their way too many losses, which is probably too late anyway too.
and usually losers can’t win / can never win against winners anyway .. even the “start” is already too late!!
This is the harsh truth / fact / reality .
Reality / Real life / Real world is very LIMITING / LIMITED in what we can & can’t do !
We are limited by money […]
I think back to a time of the hopes and dreams I had years ago of who I was going to be and fast forward I feel like I’m nowhere near those dreams. Past betrayals have left me guarded which has left me in a state of not being able to connect to anyone. I internalize everything and in public I laugh and joke as a way to hide and cope. The irony is I work in a profession where I’m surrounded by people everyday and it is my job to help them feel and look better. With each of their smiles I hope that […]
I think the time to go is getting closer.
I can feel my will to do… anything… slipping out of me, draining away like water.
I used to be energetic but now I’m becoming more and more lethargic.
There just doesn’t seem to be anything worthwhile any more, nothing I can bring myself to do, even people who I would call my friends – It seems as if I can only see them as hollow shells. I don’t think I have any true friends any more.
Very few people can feel the same way I do now, it’s as if I’ve snapped my link with the rest of the […]
All I ended up knowing was the bad in life I just sat around waiting for it to happen over and over again. Never loved myself or cared to live my life, which is a very precious gift that I have taken for granted. I never went out looking for new opportunities or experiences and I never answered the door when it came knocking. I realized that not all people are selfish that they aren’t all liars, cheaters, that they don’t all want to hurt me. I was in a really bad relationship and when it ended it was for good and it changed everything. […]
You just don’t fit? Like everything has just come together wrong and you somehow stopped being right in your own life (if you ever even were) and there’s just no place for you? Like maybe you just came off the assembly line broken? I’m feeling that way tonight (or actually this morning because I’ve spent five hours sitting here contemplating this). Wrong choices, wrong people, wrong planet maybe. I feel like I just don’t fit anywhere, like I never have been “right”, something was wrong from the get-go. It’s been a long time since I have been this low, since I have sat back and […]
To all of you who complained about the picture on my previous post.
IT IS NOT ATTENTION SEEKING.
It’s a way of showing people in what kind of trouble you’re really in. I wanted people to see that these are not just small cuts ob the wrist. These are literally wholes all over my body.
And let me clear some things for the people saying the picture is downloaded…
The pictures of self harm you find on the Internet are all real. Thise were all posted by people who do those things to themselves. So even if you did download a picture from the internet, you […]
Imagination better than reality? Why Imagination is better than reality? Why is Imagination better than reality?
by niki
written by niki
Why Imagination is better than reality?
Why is Imagination better than reality?
Why is fantasy better than reality? Why fantasy is better than reality?
What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality / human’s fantasy is better than reality.
for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, Interstellar, etc etc, they are much more interesting, full of POSSIBILITIES & varieties / variations, and better than reality / BORING reality […]
Over a year ago i lost you…
I loved you more than anything and you left me. You killed yourself and you wrote on this site before you did it so now i am.
I cant take being without you anymore. Ive missed you for so long. I thought maybe with time itd get better but its been so long. I just want to be with you. I am so lonely without you. Your family still blames me. It makes me feel so horrible inside. Maybe it was my fault. Maybe i did something. Even though you said it wasnt anyones fault it was a pproblem with […]
its probably really fucking nasty of me, but i cant handle it, fuck it, my friend, one of my best actually, refuses to get help, and i understand that its scary but he cant use me as that person i cant help him anymore, its making me more suicidal than i would be if he just got help. he needs it but instead lays all that weight, that pressure on me when i know i cant help him like he needs.
i cant help him when or how he needs it and it makes me feel worse, i just want to end it so i dont […]
I dont know exactly how to word this. Nor do i know why i feel the way i do every single day. Im often wasting my life away, feeling that damn tired feeling that makes me want to lay down and wish for the pain in my heart to stop. I keep asking myself why when the pain consumes my mind, suicide rings like a clear message.
Im a 19 year old, high school graduate male. Bisexual in my tastes, and the abomination the church I once sought comfort in, would now view me if i come out. I’ve never had a relationship. I’m dead scared […]
Your voice was the only thing that could calm me down. When I was on the bathroom floor with a bottle of pills and a cold blade in my hand, you were there. You called me and just hearing your voice made me relax and breath. You changed me but you left. I have no idea who i am anymore or what my purpose is. Im lost without you by my side. I cry everyday at the thought that i wont be hearing your voice before i fall asleep. I wont be hearing your voice when i wake up. I wont be getting any sweet […]