Sometimes I wonder about this. If I were to commit suicide. Is that all people would remember about me? I mean, do you think people would remember me for who I was? Or would all the good things I’ve ever done or ever accomplished be overshadowed by it. Would I just be remembers as that sad and weak person who killed himself?
Tag:
good
Have you ever just felt unappreciated? You go above and beyond for everyone and some way some how you’re always lacking something. Nothing you do is good enough, who you are isn’t good enough. It gets lonely at that point and all you want is someone who sees how rare you really are and appreciates it and holds on to you as long as they can because they know for a fact another like you won’t come along.
You begin to feel stuck and don’t know what else to do with yourself. It weighs in heavier and heavier, the depression, the sadness, the emptiness, and […]
Woke up this morning in pain. It was different than the usual emotional and mental pain of waking up and realizing you’re still in prison. A prison created by your mind, for your mind. Although the sense of depression, despair, loneliness, suicidal ideation and self hatred were still present, this pain was of the physical element. I tried to wake myself out of the fog and come to and try to remember what I might have done to cause myself physical pain. Specifically to my knee. I came to and remembered the events of last night as they unfolded in my mind. I stood on […]
my medication stopped working, and i’m feeling suicidal again, i’ve had a problem with cutting for years now, but its gotten alot worse recently, does anybody have any good coping skills that aren’t, that read a book, draw a picture, love yourself, therapist crap?
So, a year ago I had a laser treatment on my face which left scars. They’re not getting any better. And so many things have gone wrong since then. I wish I hadn’t done it. I thought I was getting over this, but in the past week I’ve been thinking about suicide a lot.
Yesterday I walked home and I wished there would be some madman waiting for me and throwing an axe through my chest. Then I stayed up all night browsing humor sites just to keep myself preoccupied. When I finally went to sleep near morning, the only thing that calmed me was the […]
I haven’t been on here in a while. I have had some up and downs. I’m thinking very strongly about this still. I’ve been seeing a counselor, I’m taking medication, I’ve done everything on my own to try and feel better, reach out… I will be sending my son to visit his dad in Aug. I think if by then I still feel the same, that will be the time to do it. I will have a few rough patches I know, things are still changing for me. Change can be good, and usually in my case, I’m ready for it when it comes around. I […]
Maybe you just come here for the stories?
Well here’s one, maybe it’s fiction or maybe not, all good memories become stories when they’re lost to the ocean of time.
It was summer. Last summer had been so warm his days were mostly spent shirtless. That was the summer before he met that one person who would change his life forever. But this isn’t like some soppy love story, instead of perfectly timed kisses and theatrical dialogue, it’s filled with awkward silences and fights. But they made it work. Until they didn’t.
He’d asked him to come and visit him while they weren’t living together. He’d checked with […]
It has been 11 months since I got cheated on the day before my birthday. I made a date with the weekend of the 4th of april; I just need to book the hotel.. so far all my plans were about being silent, calm, alone so that my body would be discovered only by the amount of concern people have for me.
Now, I plan to jump down from the highest hotel this city has to offer me with enough pills to make sure that I will be K.O. during the free fall…
The reason? Partly the fact that this girl cheated on me over and over […]
anyone else ever get that mental fog… where you feel so out of it almost, but not in a good way? and you kinda feel like nothing is real, that everything going on is not really happening? -and you’re not all there?… i feel that way right now, and it’s messing me up. i wonder if anyone here can tell me what i suffer from, so i can have a name for it. because it bothers me not to know…
i feel so lowly and depressed. and dammit, i told myself i wouldn’t cry today…
I have no more doubts about my suicide anymore. I know that it’s necessary for me to leave this world to find peace, to end this misery. I’m filling up my time to avoid suspicion or hospitalization at the moment, so I’m just working on becoming fluent in German haha.
Oh, and an update. No matter what I do, it’s not fucking good enough and everyone still hates me. So really, nothing new. I still hate myself. Nothing good enough to live for. I’m always just going to be a failure, a shadow in the dark, good for nothing hopeless freak.
It all started on111914 when I fell inlove with my boyfriend he was eveythinng I wanted a swimmer soccer play and a good looking guy he was so sweet and caring. This past friday he had a big swim meet I was so proud of him. After we hung at his house and got icecream we go in a fight and he broke up with me I was a reck. The next night I find my self taking 12 pills and my family yelling and me. The next morming I think I will never kiss him or hear his voice or anything again. So now […]
i am more then a year very suicidal,im just suffer,empty.
i have a good life,hobbies,good friends ,im not rich but i can get want i want,good grades in school (high school) and have a weekly routine.
i read all the advice and nothing works for me (except a psychologist that i havent tried).
i promised to my girlfriend to not do it but it feels impossible, i start to realy lose myeslf.
what to do?
sory for my shitty english grammer .
I’m slowly dying mentally each and every day. I don’t want to be here anymore. I’ve tried so hard to look past my physical deformities and and see the “good” in people but it has gotten me nowhere. I just want to die. Today, tomorrow what the fuck ever. Days are the same. My last words before I die will be, “Fuck this place.” It’s decided, I will die of suicide. I’m a little ashamed because I promised my mom I wouldn’t.. but truthfully and honestly…. FUCK THIS PLACE!
We are on different sides on the globe. She agreed to let me fly to her place for a few days. After that I learned I’m unloved, as usual.
She’s suicidal and have emotional problems. But she has an interesting life and all sorts of exciting experience. I have nothing.
I’m 25 years old and I’ve never been in a long relationship.
I have a stable 9-6 job. I have a master degree. I have good friends and family. I’ve always been a good student, employee, friend, and daughter. I excel in many areas but romantic life.
Don’t fucking ask me to just focus on other areas in life […]
I am terrified of my parents. I don’t know why. They’re good people, I just hate telling them anything. Whenever I get a grade back, I never tell them unless it’s really terrible or unless they haven’t seen a grade in the class in a long time. Like, sometimes I want to show them a grade, good or bad. But I get so much anxiety from just showing them; approaching them and saying ‘hey I got my —– test back’. I get so much anxiety that I wake up during sleep and my stomach gets that nervous feeling. I have no clue why. I just […]
Hey all,
I found this site after I googled mania and how to sleep. Obviously nothing I found helped cause I’ve been reading posts all night.
I wanted to share my suicide experience and hopefully change someones mind or help them see the point in struggling and fighting through life. I have shared a lot about myself and feel comfortable with what I have divulged. Maybe my experiences are similar or maybe they shed light on mental illness and how it affects yourself and others. Maybe what I have confessed will give you the courage to speak openly with your friends and family and seek help […]
I feel bad right now.. I keep doing bad things, but suddenly sometimes I get a moment of clear mind, I feel guilty from what I’ve done. But later on when my mind is hazy, I’ll start doing those bad things again.. The hell is wrong with my brain. I don’t want to do it yet here I am. I hate my own self. I hate my own indecisiveness. I gradually become worsen, am I not? I need to maintain my good side for the sake of my family and friends, while in an other side, I practically became darker and darker. T-T how should […]
Is there anyone to talk about AEA without getting Ratted out?
by transition32
written by transition32
I appreciate those who responded to my post about how I want to die from autoerotic asphyxia as there is no cure for what I am into! I was put on this Earth to share my story with as many people as I can! At least if I lose my sanity and end up taking my life because of this intense desire that I have, then I will have at least accomplished something very important by sharing my story about it!
I wish that there was someone who I could talk to about this, but I don’t trust anyone! I’ve gone to a couple of therapists […]
I’m a loser , I am a loser in this cruel boring LIMITED real world , reality , real life
by niki
written by niki
I’m a loser , I am a loser in this cruel boring LIMITED real world , reality , real life .. !
I am a 33 years old Asian guy, who used to have so many beautiful hope & dreams ,
and many people have told me that I’m a smart, multi talent , very creative, & wise person
but now the more I see this cursed world, people, humans beings, and this reality, the more I lose hope in humanity , losing hope in human beings, and also lose hope in myself & my future
you see ,.. Reality / real world / real […]
Hello everyone. It’s been awhile since I have logged on. I been dealing with the depression on my own. I have had good and bad days. I tired to talk to a counselor at school about my suicidal thinking, but I was put on a waiting list. I have to wait a whole month before someone will even talk to me. By then I could have killed myself… Just saying.
I have tried praying…
well, now I am here.
what are your thought? Do you think suicide is a selfish way to go? Have you ever heard someone tell you that? People tell me that it’s selfish? But how […]