Tag:

Grandparents

by Dawn 7/29/2012

written by Dawn

It’s my last day here and I am still treated like shit. And there’s gonna be fighting as soon as I get back to my grandparents because they messed with my room. I fucking hate everyone… I hate my family. I don’t want to be here. My throat hurts after arguing with my brother again. I was only defendding myself. I’m sick of everyone’s bull— crap….. gotta stop cussing…. I’m done I’m done. I wanna get there so that I will feel more capable of functioning knowing I can end it anytime…

If I had had a gun anytime in the past 10 min, I would […]

7/29/2012 8 comments

Nothing to say.

by mudderfker 7/16/2012

written by mudderfker

I guess ill start from the begining… I grew up without a father, for my childhood, I never had fun because I was always forced to do homework from books that you can buy. If I did a problem wrong, I would get hit with a wooden stick on the hands or slapped in the face… I always enjoyed games since I grew attached to it considering my mom was at work. Playing games also were the part of the my life where I would unstress my selfI also never had an actual summer since my mom still forced me to to spend all my […]

7/16/2012 0 comment

idk …

by lifeshard 7/13/2012

written by lifeshard

so im kind of new to this & so far it looks great .. obviously i have my own share of problems or i wouldn’t be here .. so this is my story .. I was born & raised in CA & my grandparents raised me .. i recently ( its been 2 yrs now) moved back with my real parents & we’reÂ all the way in Tonga ( island in the south pacific ) & so far its beenÂ a major change .. school , life , boys , new people , etc etc .. tbh i didnt want to move , but i had no […]

7/13/2012 4 comments

Decision

by Dawn 7/10/2012

written by Dawn

My grandparents were gonna let me see my dad in California before I go back to VA but he can’t afford to get me back in time for court, so again, not gonna see him. This game that’s been going on between them my whole life. So I have a choice. Go back to VA early with my sister or stay the rest of the summer here and go back when we were planning to-at the end of the summer. If I leave early, I know it will break my mom’s heart again and I’ll have to be with my grandparents longer. But if I […]

7/10/2012 3 comments

So You want to end your life? Think there’s no hope, and you have nothing to live for? READ THIS…. Email me if you think differently , or just talk to me because I CARE , wether you believe it or not â™¥

by alexaawearsprada 7/9/2012

written by alexaawearsprada

Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say â€œFinally, theyâ€™re gone.â€ No, they will not say â€œIâ€™m happy they did that.â€ No, they will not say â€œI never loved them anyways.â€ They will die. Their hearts will break. They will hurt, more than you […]

7/9/2012 10 comments

So you want to end your life? You think there’s no hope? Read this.. if this doesn’t change your perspective, talk to me … I CARE.

by alexaawearsprada 7/3/2012

written by alexaawearsprada

DON’T END YOUR LIFE , DON’T GIVE UP , REACH OUT TO ME.

7/3/2012 13 comments

Really struggling

by SoVeryTired 6/28/2012

written by SoVeryTired

I am really struggling at the moment. My suicidal tendencies are so strong, I am so de-sensitised to the idea of killing myself, that it is really only my two sons who keep me anchored. When even that becomes not enough, I go into hospital, where I am now – again – the fifth time in 2 1/2 years, and I’ve already been in now for five weeks this time. I just looked at my progress chart, and basically there has been none – a few blips where I got better for a few days, and then I drop down again.
I am just loosing […]

6/28/2012 2 comments

by Dawn 6/26/2012

written by Dawn

My grandparents are still trying to control my life from here. They told me before I came down here that I can see my dad in California if he pays for it. Now they say they will do anything they can to prevent it. Now the’ve found out I want to try to get a GED this summer and will do anything to keep me in school. Usually IÂ would let that put me down but strangely I’m more motivated than I’ve ever been. I just got out of middle school and I’m gonna try for my GED this summer. I want to show them up. […]

6/26/2012 3 comments

I hate my family

by ej 6/20/2012

written by ej

They are terrible. My grandma is fucking crazy and she screams at me and chases me around. I live with my grandparents. My grandpa has no heart for the emotion of another human being. They used to beat their kids. My mom hit me really hard yesterday because of something stupid. I’m gifted but they tell me I’m not. They don’t encourage me or any of my talents or anything I do. They constantly blame me for things and make me feel like shit. I have no confidence. I don’t go out. I don’t do anything. I research and self-educate myself a lot but they […]

6/20/2012 3 comments

Unsure and tired

by JacobB90 6/15/2012

written by JacobB90

I dont know where to start. Â I’ve been trying to deal with my depression for a long time now and no matter what i just cant be happy. Â There are a lot of things that have happened to me and my family in the last few years that contribute to my depression. Â Suicide is always something that crosses my mind everyday. Â And iÂ don’tÂ know if i want to do it or not.

I guess i could start talking about my family and how they contribute to my demise. Â First off theres my brother (i wont use his real name so he will be ‘mike’ for this” mike […]

6/15/2012 16 comments

Worried?

by Dawn 6/10/2012

written by Dawn

Yeah I didn’t think so… Why would any of you worry about me? Anyways, sorry I’ve been gone, I’ve been safe at a friend’s house and then my grandparents saw a ‘bad’ pic on my ipod and now I cant get on a computer without them over my shoulder. Litterally. She stands right here and reads my texts and watches what i do. They’re at church right now so I get a chance to get on. Church…. My only freedom is when they are at church. Anyways… 4 days till I get on a plane for Florida. Not that it matters. My mom will probly […]

6/10/2012 1 comment

Completely empty and alone

by justindiowa 6/4/2012

written by justindiowa

My entire life seems cursed with pain, unfairness and shortcomings. My dad died when I was 14 and my grandparents were dead before I was born. My mom has tried hard to raise me right but she had to work 2 jobs my entire childhood and spent most of her free time with her boyfriend away from our home. In a nutshell I had to teach myself everything without much of a role model. During high school I turned to drinking beer and during my senior year I averaged an 18 pack of beer per night. My grades failed miserably and I never really had […]

6/4/2012 6 comments

endless nightmare

by futile1989 5/31/2012

written by futile1989

Woke up from a very disturbing nightmare, into this life that is a nightmare that i live in. Even with my daughter waking up beside me it still cant save me from the brutal reality. I live with my grandparents still,. my grandma has fibromialgia, depression, and barely talks to me, i hate her, im trying to watch Bella and shes sleeping on the couch, i asked her to move she wouldnt, said she wasnt like “sleep sleeping” lol *****. I fucking hate her, i know she heard me screaming this morning as i woke up, i seen her, she said nothing. Ill do it […]

5/31/2012 0 comment

…

by Dawn 5/28/2012

written by Dawn

Dammit I hate my grandparents!! I gotta get the he’ll out. I don’t even care about Florida right now. I need a fuckin escape, suicide, drugs, anything. Fuck life fuck people (not you guys… Sorry) fuck me. I don’t know why I’m still here. I’m a burden, a waste, and worthless. They won’t let me forget that. Shit I need an escape.

5/28/2012 13 comments

I know

by Dawn 5/28/2012

written by Dawn

Everything will feel better when I’m back in Florida with my mom. I do want to die now but I’ve chosen to put it off. I want to see my mom again first. And when I’m there all of this will go away. And those who know I’m suicidal because of where I am now, my grandparents, being taken away from my mom ect., ask why I want to come back after summer. Because I do want to die. I want to kill myself so bad. But I’m not doing it there. I’m not going to kill myself in Florida, a place that has […]

5/28/2012 1 comment

Pointless circles

by whybother 5/28/2012

written by whybother

Love this ugly little world we’ve created. Â The only purpose is to screw, eat, sleep, get drunk, get high, and go to work. Â I was lied to. Â I grew up looking at both grandparents, paternal and fraternal–genuinely in love with each other and marriages that lasted over 60 years each. Â I thought I could have that. Can’t anymore. Â You’ve completely sicked up sex so much, it’s nothing but pointless empty monkey humping. Â No love, no respect, no dignity. Â It’s a sick public farce. Â And it’s all about party party party. Â Empty. Â Pointless. Â I’m supposed to fill up 60 to 80 of that mindless garbage?

Can’t find […]

5/28/2012 2 comments

About me.. A little

by Dawn 5/21/2012

written by Dawn

I am fifteen and up until recently my life was fine. I was already depressed but I didn’t have any problems with my life. I know I’m talked about and picked on at school but I didn’t realize how much until after the big event that ruined my life. I know others don’t know that I’m any weaker and more vulnerable than before but I feel like the talking about me and messing with me has gotten a lot worse since my mom moved away. I didn’t have much of a choice but to stay here with my grandparents and my sister. My sister has […]

5/21/2012 8 comments

Why didn’t I just kill myself a long time ago?

by lunabell1987 5/21/2012

written by lunabell1987

I am starting to feel like I am being punished for being alive, I wasn’t truly meant to exist anyway since I was unplanned.Â I can’t have one good thing happen and if something does, I pay for it later on.Â I have been through so much in my life, was mentally and physically abused by my dad, had to watch it happen to my mom who is disabled, been into women’s shelters, was raised in a cult like religion which left me without friends, social activities was highly restricted, no help from them with what was going on at home since they said in […]

5/21/2012 1 comment

Why so many of us give up?

by themaskoftom 5/21/2012

written by themaskoftom

snippets from a journal I write, to try and not spill all this into my personal life and job; better on paper, and better left where some will agree and sympathize.

This is the modern world — if you are over 45 and out of work, you cannot expect a good job or a salary that is more than basic sustenance. There will be no retirement, no golden years, no health care, no public assistance. By not having amassed wealth, I became of no value to this country. I am miserable about the state of this country, half the citizens clamoring for more breaks for the […]

5/21/2012 23 comments

What would you do?

by nobodyatall 5/21/2012

written by nobodyatall

I’m pretty much as broken and useless as it’s possible to be. I can’t do anything right – not exaggerating, it’s the truth. I’m barely human and don’t really do the things that normal humans do or feel the way normal humans feel. When I’m hurt or frustrated I get angry – but real people don’t feel anger, don’t express those things. Real people are happy most of the time, not unhappy or angry most of the time. I’m just wrong. Broken. Unfit for human consumption. God I wish my mother had aborted me. What is the point of me? There is none. The worst […]

5/21/2012 2 comments

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