never in my life did I think there were as many people who feel the same way as me. I am 45, been battling since I was 10 or so. I have won and lost, two prior attempts that but by the grace of God i survived. However even though I firmly believe I am a walking miracle I still know that one day I will end it.
I don’t know exactly when, but I do know what will be my last straw, and that will be when I lose my best and only true friend Chip. my chocolate lab. he is 6 now, so […]
The immortal bard really nailed it down here. You can cut and paste snippets of the soliloquy and answer almost every interrogatory on this website.
…that is the question—
Whether ’tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them?
To die, to sleep—
No more; and by a sleep, to say we end
The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks
That Flesh is heir to?
‘Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,
To sleep, perchance to Dream; Aye, there’s the rub,
For in that sleep […]
To those tempted today to ask what Robin Williams had to be depressed about, with his success, fame, wealth, lovely home, lovely family, tons of opportunities and great moments in his life, please just stop. If he had died of cancer, would you ask what he had had to be cancerous about? If he had been run over by a car, would you have aske – See more at: http://www.alastaircampbell.org/blog/2014/08/12/may-robin-williams-tragic-end-herald-the-start-of-new-attitudes-to-depression/#sthash.vz4Hfjrj.dpuf
RIP Robin Williams. When I heard of his death, and the method, it disturbed me because I said, “even great people can be beaten by the demons”. Fuck suicide, fuck depression. It’s a fucking epidemic. Pardon my French, I’m having bad anxiety and self harm urges again today. And lately I’ve also wanted to “pretend” hang myself again. I used to tie a rope around my neck and yank until I felt like I was gonna pass out. I figure I better not do it but damn the urges to do whatever I can to be self destructive is so great.
Help me God.
“Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he’s depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says, “Treatment is simple. Great clown ”Pagliacci” is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.” Man bursts into tears. Says, “But doctor…I am ”Pagliacci”.”
I am feeling such a huge sense of loss and I didn’t even know the man. I only knew of him and from a distance. Although he always made me laugh and I was always so touched by the many kind things he did in his life, I could see the pain and anguish in his every expression. Even when he was trying so desperately to be light heart-ed, there it was in his eyes, the window to his soul. Thank you Sir Robin, for all of the laughs that you gave me, the wonderful memories of family and friends and great times while enjoying […]
my life is crap. it will always be. i have bipolar disorder. i will always have it. why should i keep going? im not even sad right now, im just being honest. I have two people who im living for, my gf and my son. I cant provide for them because of my issues right now, plus horrible economy. im poor, and black. i have health problems. i couldnt find love if my gf left me, which she might. I have 1 other friend. I live with my folks, and my family is sick just like me. Im thinking of killing myself, and writing a […]
theres just no point in living.. i dont wake up in the morning and thin “hmm what a great day!” I hate my life i really do. and nobody seems to see it. i just want to go somewhere and cry forever because thats the only thing I seem to be doing now. crying. i just want to get in a car and flip ten times.. i wish that would happen.
Finally a site where I can be honest and tell the truth. So where did I come from? From about age 13 or so under the influence of some great adult leaders I got into helping people especially in the area of health care.
Whether it was in my early age with the first aid and CPR card, until the 30 years that I’ve been licensed as a paramedic and respiratory therapist I did my best for everyone. I don’t know if it was the adrenaline rush or just the pure joy of seeing someone get better or comforted at their time of death I was […]
i was doing great, my life was going in the right direction just got a new job, i was moving up in the world but of course the universe had to laugh in my face and take away one of the things that mattered the most in my life. 2 weeks ago my best friend and i had a difficult talk. long story short she told me that we couldn’t be friends any more because it would be better for both of us and it would save us a headache in the long run. its funny how when you think your life is great it […]
When I am upset or seriously depressed I listen to music. Hateful and sad. Maybe that isn’t the best thing to do but after I get passed all of the crying and cutting, and panic attacks, I feel great again. My mother saw my scars for the first time today. I have always been so good at hiding them. I can’t believe I was not paying attention. I feel terrible for that. It isn’t her fault. It’s everyone else’s. I really want to speak to her about it but I am so scared. What if she does not love me anymore. My father used to […]
That’s how long she’ll be in England for her internship. Just why. Every freaking time we went jogging it was more fun; and today was so great too, we ran together the whole time and laughed and had fun. And afterwards when I said goodbye and wished her luck for her trip I asked whether she was going to go jogging with us again when she’s back from England. She said “yes, probably” and that it’s 12 weeks until she’ll be back, as if she was expecting me to ask for her number or email or anything so we could talk or chat when she’s […]
Life’s just one great big illusion.
People telling you how to live your life, how to look, how to act, how to feel.
But screw all that.
We’re all the same.
Even if you’re always getting the short end of the stick and the asshole next to you’s rich.
Just remember that it’s all some big illusion, you’re the one who’s the better person.
Music qoute of the day: “America spells competition, join us in our blind ambition, get yourself a brand new motor car. Someday soon we’ll stop to ponder what on earth’s this spell were under, we made the grade and still we wonder who the hell we are.” – […]
I have really mixed emotions about coming back to sp.
I battled with depression, suicide, cutting and general shit in my life and I have come close to death many times. I believed that life was never going to get better, that I was going to die a lonely virgin loser and bring shame and hurt to my family. I have stood atop the highest building in my college and peered over the edge and stood there for many painful hours. I have cut deep, and popped pills. I was badly beaten as a child periodically and mentally tortured. I came here and wrote angry posts […]
As a depressed person, I always hear “Stay strong, God will help you.” or “God had better plans for you.” and a whole lot of other shit. Neither me nor my friends believe in God. Why would we? If God is so great, why would he let us suffer like this? Why would he let some people take their own life? Why would he put us through Hell? I’m a much firmer believer of The Devil than I am of God. If God really existed, he wouldn’t make us stop believing in him. Get your shit together! Open your eyes! God. Is. Not. Real!
Hello, my name is Martijn. I’m a 15 year old boy. I’ve had a depression before when I was about 12. It lasted about a year. Ive been in therapy and been taking medication since then. The following 3 years of my life have been great. But half a year ago, I started fealing anxious again. strange, violent toughts towards me and the people around me popped op in my head. I often felt empty, as in a dream but i couldn’t ‘wake up’. It felt like I didn’t use my medication anymore, wich I have to control my anxiety. Since then, I started feeling […]
I hate my life. I’m so depressed.. It all started about a year ago. There was this guy I had liked for a while and we finally started talking. The first few weeks, everything was great. We texted just about everyday. Exchanged the finest words. Things were perfect. Then suddenly one day it’s like he just forgot about me. He started tweeting about this other girl and it made me feel invisible. Once him and her stopped talking, we started again. Then another girl came into the picture. I hated seeing them flirt at school. Anyways, he’d flip flop back and forth between her and […]
rember i said sometimes;
ive been in lots of them.. some times there meanigful, some times there just for sex, and sometimes there just because you need someone to sit there and complement you all the fucking time… witch is okay, because some times its okay.
right now i am in a relashonship with nick, this is one of those meaningful ones.. before this one i had a boynamed john and all he wanted was sex and i am not secure with my body enough to do that sooo…. there for i dont think i will ver have sex . but some one should always have someone […]
just wanted to say goodbye to all you ppl. it was nice while it lasted. lately theres been alot of trolling and impersonating. and before i start hating ppl who are pretending to be other ppl that were nothing but nice to me… im just gonna leave and not come back. its too bad that some ppl have to ruin things like a great chat ive been coming to for years and meeting great ppl in but i suppose it is the internet. but i can see this escalating and its just bullshit that i dont want to deal with right now. so bye […]
My life is a thrill ride, I swear. Three weeks ago, I had friends checking in on me to see if I had killed myself, yet…A week ago, I was on top of the world. I was feeling great. I had no worries and didn’t even feel the back twinge of depression. Now, I’m back down. This time, I feel like I was tossed off a skyscraper and the impact is forever engraved into my bones. I am back to not feeling any type of emotion except apathy and sadness. I am at a loss and I don’t know if I can crawl out of […]