I saw my best friend today for the first time in about a few months and seeing her was the best and being able to hug her again was the most amazing feeling but i promised her i would never leave until i at least saw her once then i would most likely leave. Now i’m having second thoughts but i really want to leave. I have no clue what to do….
i saw you standing there alone upon the roof
your eyes puffy red and your lips were turning blue
tell me now
whats your reason darling tell me now
and dreams are made of wonder
and the curiosity
but if you do this now im telling you its not meant to be
so dont be sad there is now reason darling dont be sad
do follow the yellow brick road
talk to the stars in the sky it wont be easy i know there is no reason to cry
keep on moving keep the blood pumping keep your heart beating keep the smile
keep on […]
The love of my life wasn’t a romantic one. We shared an intimacy that – were I a writer – would be immortalized in literature. It’s akin to David and Jonathan – an epic friendship. It was one of laughter, humility, gentleness, and kindness. When he hugged me I knew he never wanted to let go, he always wanted me to be a part of his life. We could say anything to each other, knowing our friendship was strong enough to be shaken and still survive. We shared star gazing, hikes, dancing, road trips, cigarettes, moving houses, hospital visits, and train rides. We shared tears, […]
I was always alone as a kid. I never knew my dad (I’m pretty sure I was artificially inseminated), my sisters ran away from home, and my mom worked two jobs and vented her frustrations on me. I never really knew how to have friends, but I always tried to talk to other kids. It never worked.
I saw people who had “best friends” and big brother, and I wanted those things so badly. I’d go home and just imagine what he’d be like: strong, smart, funny, and like all the music and video games that I did.
When I was turning 17, a mere 10 days […]
I don’t know why people keep connecting with me. I know it’s flattering and some people might actually would do anything to get that but it’s rather hard for me. I know spending time with friends would take me away from my problems for a while and that is nice but I know I’m going to be an ass and ruin it. I don’t even know if I’m being an ass or not. I don’t know if people accept me or just trying to keep a profile. I am weird and extremely moody. One shit can hurt me like what AM I!?
I am fine being […]
Maybe I should just give it one more shot. My last time I was successful, well a combo of drugs and the lq withdrawls, either way, it did work, so it’s my time.
The other day some dude was talking about jumping, he had rented a room. I am super afraid of heights, but I hate wasting money, so I would just HAVE TO JUMP. Vodka will give me courage, unless it makes me sick, or worse I just fall asleep. I have the money right now to get a room and alcohol. I pray, many times a day, I pray for others and that I’m […]
So last week I went over to my soon to be ex-wife’s apartment to get my belongings. First time I talked to her in over a year. After trash talking me for the last year, to my surprise she was sweet as could be. And then to top things off, when I went over to pick up my son for a visit on Sunday, she came up to the car to give me a book (about God) she bought me.
She said she forgives me and only wants the best for me. She said she’s sorry things didn’t work out (which I thought was strange phrasing […]
I wish everyone on here could all hug each other. I like hugs. We all need hugs.
Those familiar with my posts know that my fiancée and her three kids abandoned me and erased me from their lives completely. And that was after 5 1/2 years of complete and utter devotion to them.
The oldest and youngest knew their biological fathers. The middle child did not know hers. I first met her when she was 7 years old. Her mom and I started our relationship when she was 9.
At first she didn’t know anything about it, but when she found out, she couldn’t have been happier. Even though her younger sister’s dad had adopted her when she was 6, she never felt like […]
I read the posts here and I feel so sad. So many people, so much sadness. I wish I could give each and every person a hug.
Let me say this… YOU are the most important person in your life. Please provide yourself with loving words, loving actions and hold on.
Take great care of you.
…Charlie Chow Mein. His fees are reasonable…some daily catnip and treats. And food. Lots of food. Fresh water. Belly rubs. Ear rubs. Toys. A $300 cat post(ikr! It was on sale for half price) that reaches the ceiling and takes up most my living room. Attention whenever he wants it. And I have to share my food. He likes deli meat, vegetable crackers and coconut flavoured yogurt. So worth it though. He keeps all my secrets, lets me cry all over him, he feels nice to […]
I can’t quite bring myself to include the word “happy” although I wish I could. At least that is my sincere wish for all of you. But I know there is much pain and suffering, and these things make no distinction regarding new years, new days, hours or seconds.
As we do pass this sort of chronological demarcation, I genuinely hope that each of you can find the one hug, one smile, one friend or just one touch from another that makes a difference for you. If but one person finds a few moments of comfort it’s worth all the effort put forth to find it. […]
I wish I could go back 11 years a go and be 5 years old again. I use just to play and not have any problems and in that time if I cries the reason will be my doll is broken or I was playing and I fall down even school we use to learn how to color and cut a picture and all our friends in 5 years old were the true because they were still young and they are not wild. we use to be scared of darkness and monsters but when we grew up when you there are many things that […]
I am a genderfluid, bisexual (stronger preference for girls), depressed as hell, self harming, masochistic person. The two H’s in life that equal some small degree of happiness are horses and hugs. I got a haircut two days ago that made me feel handsome for the first time ever. But the guy I like didn’t like the new style. Well, that shouldn’t matter but it does. I’m too dependant on others. I need to know if I’ve done something right and self loathe if something goes wrong…
I need a hug. A real one. Instead I cut and grin because my blood runs warm across my […]
I want to find the way so I could talk to him, and tell him that
here everything’s worst. That my will is dead, that I would like
to have a change to hug him, I want everything to be as it was,
my life is so grey that the pain will never go away.
I want to remember, that it’s better not to believe in love.
I should hate him for leaving me here, I’m just a nostalgic
lovesick person, that hates feeling like this.
Someone really helped me. It’s long, but I want to put it into words and share.
Yesterday I felt extremely lonely. Devoid of all emotion. I just…couldn’t feel anything at all.
Almost anything. Just when I looked in the mirror and saw age spots and gray hair on someone so young it just showed the fighting I’ve been doing and stress of my life. At that moment I felt anger, worthlessness, and wasted years. It was like all of the emotions I’ve felt were physically manifesting themselves as a cruel reminder, every time I look the mirror – looking back at me.
I was thinking about suicide…again…but I […]
So, life has been shit. And apparently, even though I’m working my ass off at my job 5 days a week, short shifts of 6 hours a day, and looking for another job on top of this one, the universe has decided to piss all over me, still.
When will it end?
November 2013: my husband passed away. To this point I was a housewife. Inherited $25,000 of debt.
November-January: Slip $5-6000 more into debt due to final expenses, bills, etc. New debt total: ~$30,000
January 2014: facing homelessness, dad and step mother take me in with multitudes of “conditions”
January-March: Broke beyond belief, being treated like a slave in […]
Will you use your final act to help others in suffering? I am thinking of writing a concise message for the news to pick up on if they cover my death.
Depression and anxiety are real. Hug your friends. Learn to notice signs of depression (they can be hard to detect). Offer your own experiences with pain, and don’t give up on friends going through a rough time. You are likely much more important to them than you think you are.
Am I rambling?
The method must be drastic. I don’t know how specific I am allowed to be here, but I am inspired by the monks in […]
Snuggle up with me here on this thread of amazing wonders!
Tell me moments where you needed a hug the most, and let me know who you would like to hug next. I’m crying as I type this, I’m crying with happiness. I love each and every one of you. You all give me lots of hope, and now I want to listen to all of your problems. It’s my way of saying, “Thanks for tolerating me!” (^^)
(I’m not leaving this forum. Not unless the administrator […]
I wish I had the courage to do something like this. Maybe without the costumes. Just open my arms up and see who would take a free hug. What do you guys think about the video. Would you have still hugged him. I would have. Costume or not. This is my wish for all of you tonight. All of you who are hurting, lonely, sad, depressed, feeling suicidal. Hanging on by a very thin thread. Hugs from me to you. I hope and pray you’ll make it through the night. Don’t give up. Don’t give in. Good night SP. =)