I’d just like to take a moment to address all of the people that have related to my stories. Especially you Sammi, and you MissDysphoria. I write these things from my heart, and you say they’re beautiful, you say that they’re amazing and I can’t help but say thank you. Thank you for taking the time to read what I put down. I owe you everything for this, because I’m just some random person sitting behind a laptop with some shitty stories in his head. You took the time out of your day to read what I wrote and you resonated with it. I don’t […]
A beautiful girl in a world so cold
A boy in a new place
They both feel so old
The girl sees a new face
In public they kiss
A trap has fallen
The boy nervous he might miss
His heart has been stolen
The boy falls in lust
The girl sees her chance
He gave her his trust
Her lies pierced his heart like a lance
The fights
The anger
They last all night
Increasing the danger
New friends
Jealousy arises
Happiness never ends
Demons come in all shapes and sizes
A lie so bold
The boy believes
A truth never told
Another girl greaves
Flashing light
Hurried breath
Terrifying night
Impending death
He wants to leave
She begs him to stay
She can’t believe
It turned out this way
Author’s note: This is my first […]
Even though I’m not suicidal (actively seeking a way out or planning anything) I’d be more than happy to choose a peaceful exit from this world. I don’t get our societies sick and twisted obsession with forcing everyone to stay alive against there will. I was put in a psyche ward over a month ago, and yes it did “help”, but it was only temporary. They get payed to force me to live, my family wants to keep me alive for there own selfish purposes. Like I said many times, I didn’t choose to be born nor have I chose the cards I was dealt […]
No, oh no, not what you think. This is just another sad girl who is going to complain about her relationship, so here goes it. My love and I have been together for years; high school sweethearts if you care to call us that. This kid knows how many attempts I have made to end my life; however, each time it seems to be another friend who picks me back up? The same thing happened tonight because of just all the bull that he promised and yet again didn’t own up to. He makes me feel like I am nothing, and when I get suicidal, […]
I’m sitting in my bathroom floor half crying half laughing. plus I drank vodka and i feel really sick.
So today is my birthday. And i used to love birthdays. As a kid i had a lot of friends. Now i have like 2 best friends. They suckkkkkkk
I decided for my 15th birthday to invite friends for a party. I found where mom hides her alcohol and i stole some of the drinks. Plus moms out of town so i have the house all to myself.
Everyone should have come in 9pm. It’s almost midnight. No one showed up. Not even my best friends. So i’m just […]
Do you ever feel so painfully average? Like everything about you is so boring that you get to the point of feeling nonexistent? I know that a lot of people on this website and around the world for that matter, hate themselves for being too different, but I can’t help but hate myself for being too regular. As a students perspective this is/was especially difficult growing up. With the new found trend of “Be different, Be you” I always had trouble with that. I was never the kid with the strange birthplace, I was never the kid with 10+ siblings. I’m aware this is all […]
Well I really didn’t want to go for help but then I found this website so I decide to post something to try and reach out to anyone. I might as well say I’m sorry for not trying to handle my own problem and instead go on this website to try and get a little hope for still living, because the only thing I feel every day is mental abuse and physical abuse. Now I’ll start off by saying that I’m 17 and I am the worst person ever. Ever since I was 13 all I wanted to do was die, especially when I was […]
I heard from an old friend again yesterday. He’s this 20 year old kid who has a hard time dealing with life and figuring out what he wants and who he is. I’ve known him since he was 16 but never met in person because he lives way too far away. He looks up to me for advice and such but he will talk to me for a few days then disappear for months on end, leaving me to feel like I can’t rely on him coz he’s just a kid. He waited until he was 18 to tell me that he liked me and […]
I find it extremely difficult to actually make decent real life friends.
I’m 15 years old and all the “Real life friends” ive had up until this point have either used me or don’t care about me and make fun of me.
I made another post about most of my life and in that post I explained how I had cancer from when I was 9 up until I was 14. most of the people I know call me cancer boy and some people act so scared of me because they might catch my disease even though it is not contagious (obviously) and I do not have […]
I have researched and read that jumping from a great height is the most effective method of suicide this side of shooting yourself with a shotgun. Yet I worry about the people who might find me: what if it’s some little kid who is then traumatized for life, because of what I did. That would be jacked up.
I’ve been reminded on facebook that it’s been 20 years since high school… This is me with all the co-founders of the first nonprofit I worked with. 20 years ago to this day our nonprofit became official. (I’m the goth one all in black in front)
In the 20 years since…. I only regret not paying attention. As a kid, I firmly believed I’d be dead by age 20 so I never really took my life seriously. *sigh*
Anyone else feel guilt knowing what you’re going to do to others? Of course most people aren’t backed into a corner like I am… but it’s hitting me a little bit here and a little bit there.
One of my bosses had a friend die yesterday. With my death coming soon, I feel bad for inevitably making her cry.
For everyone at my jobs, for letting them down, being such a disappointment and a waste of time, money, energy, training and resources. I’m sorry I can’t go on being homeless.
My kid. Yes, I have one out there who will be 17 next month. It’s her decision after […]
I just returned home from a friend’s house. I had an amazing weekend, it was the first one in a while…
So, I’ll get to the point of why I’m here, because honestly if I had just only had a great weekend no offense but I wouldn’t be here- not on this site.
I walk through the door, after just having locked my car and everything and coming inside, and my sister in law is already talking about me to my brother. She seen me come inside, she knew I was there.
“She snapped at Brook” my brother asked how she knew if I did because I just […]
So, some trivial shit happened about an hour ago:
*Nephew pulls pins out of board, I lose my shit and pick them all up*
Me: Mom, where do we keep the pins?
Mom: How about, instead o-
Me: Uh, I just want t-
Mom: YOU’RE JUST LIKE YOU BROTHER… AND YOUR FATHER!!!
Me: Mom, I just want to know where-
Mom: WHY, YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME!!!
At this point, no one would tell me where to leave them, so I just left them on the table, my sister comes into my room, throws them all over my bed, and yells at me for leaving pins where […]
“not enough” The message that’s been drove into me since a child, sometimes directly but mostly indirectly through culture and family. As a Christian why should I feel like I’m not enough? Because that’s all I know on this earth right now. I find myself discouraged, not enough drive, “not enough good grades, you’re a failure , your faith is not strong enough, your mind is twisted.” The messages clouding my mind, not irrational, for they are loud and clear coming from the family and pastors. Perhaps I’m just prideful when I come up with the idea that, “hey, maybe all this pressure and constant […]
so, my headache had gotten worse (due to overthinking) and I decided to go to a counselor and she told me that I should undergo to a therapy and I’m planning to tell it to my mom but I guess she’s just kid me again like when I told her I wanted to die/kill myself and she said she’d even help me. I wish I could stop thinking you know, i wish these thoughts would just perish
i was reading today where Belgium gave the euthanasia green light to a healthy 24 year old woman who has been wanting to die since she was a kid. She claimed that life was just not for her. I can relate to that in so many ways. Euthanasia for the mentally ill is gaining ground in that great nation, I just wish it would gain the same kind of ground in the ole US of A.
I remember when Brittney Maynard was giving interviews about her right to die due to her terminal brain tumor. I was hoping that her message would spread to the nifty […]
To be this, I’m the last
Of the Lords, saving the underground
Just leaving behind
The Goddess, pure, like the wind
I seek to, like a blooming flower
I want to go, home
How do I conquer the destiny
I’m riding, the one, on the Rhino
Like that kid, that loves WWF
WCW, and the new, world order
Order, like the name
Only piecing this puzzle like picking the leaves
From the ground
I hate being black ever since i was a kid im now a 25yrd guy plus im short im 5″8 no body wants me. I tried talking to this girl but she said that she wouldnt date me becuase her mother didnt like black ppl and i could tell she didnt eather this is partly why i want to burn my color off.god cursed me with this ugly body now im going to get out of it by setting myself on fire
Now I want to kill myself for the simple fact that I’m sick to death of every person on earth saying I’m bat shit crazy and fucked up in the head because I want love in my life!!!! Everyone since I was a kid has said that it’s wrong for me to think about love or want love!! Now I get called bat shit crazy and am said to not know what love is or be capable of loving anyone!!! I am going to fucking kill myself this year so everyone can shut the fuck up!!!!!!!!!!