Why do you care?
Why do you stay here?
Why do you comfort me?
Why do you try to help me?
Why do you try to tell me lies about myself?
Why do you try to prevent me from cutting?
Why do you think I should stay here?
Why?!
Tag:
lies
My friends tell me I have an eating disorder…I told them they where full of shit…but they aren’t I’m not stupid I know that not eating is killing me but I cant eat…it makes me feel sick even thinking about it…Maybe being skinny will make my mom love me again…
Heads up, this is a rant. I need someone in the world to hear this even though it will never change my life. No, this is not the only reason I want my life to be over but of all the reasons, this is the only one I chose and I want someone to understand how stupid I feel and how lost I am.
I don’t even know who I am anymore. I used to think that when I started my own life, I’d do things right. I’d find love and give love. I’d be strong and confident. I’d make everyone around me feel welcome and […]
“We’re all lying to the mirror, lying to ourselves.”
What will I type? What message am I oddly eager to send, although once I begin typing I have to force myself to continue. This terrible apathy that I have acquired, where I care not when I see my mother rotting away, a wasted life, why do I feel the need to add one more silly post in the thousands that languish here already. In this curious journey of reaching another state of mind, I find myself hating my apathy, oh the irony. All that we, the youth at least, need is a sense of purpose. And if not that, then we would oh so […]
Ive live 17 years and 2 weeks. these years have been plagued with ridicule ,lies and grief.
i might be the most stupid person i ever meet. living this tragic life of morbid obesity and stupidity is a horrible burden.
So i just wanna feel light and careless. Death please take me.
I’m fed up of broken promises of ‘when you move to X, things will get better’. I moved schools three times (once in year 8, then again in year 12). It never got better. Now I’m at uni and I was lured in with that same stupid lie. It isn’t better here. If anything it’s worse. I’ve already overdosed here, unfortunately failing. I’m just fed up and lonely and at the end of a thin rope. I’m ready to snap.
Someone I’ve loved since the moment I’ve ever talked to them is slipping away. The sad part is I’m letting him. I can’t do anything about him not loving me anymore. I’ve fought for him for 9 months, if not more. I’m done. I can’t keep waiting on him to realize if I’m what he wants or not. I haven’t talked to him since Thursday. He says he cares and would do anything for me but I just don’t know anymore. I don’t know if it was love or lust. Maybe neither Maybe all of it was just a big joke, but I just can’t take it anymore. The […]
I wear a smile well, it’s my best accessory
I do it because I know it’s necessary
Behind the smile it’s revealed I’m dying inside
And it’s amazing the world buys all the lies.
Nobody will ever know
That the pain doesn’t let me go
It will haunt me until the day I die
I don’t want my tears to stain the world outside.
Trapped in a world I’m not good enough for
What am I still doing here?
Only in death will I find some of bliss
I know that I won’t be missed.
My life is giving me whip lash.
Every morning, I wake up to a living hell I call home. I hate home. Home isn’t home to me. Home means miserable and uncomfortable feelings. Home is locking myself in my room, crying. I race to get ready for school making the best effort to look at least decent. Khakis and a green shirt, everyday. Once I herd my brothers into the car, late again, no breakfast, and being called a ***** by even my 12 year old brother. The drive to school is always one of my most depressing moments of the day. The music is loud and […]
No body loves me, nobody see’s the tears that falls down. Iscream but you cant hear me to busy hearing everybody else. You said you loved me but why choose something over me tgat means nothing. You said I was the only one so why pick that instead of being with me forever looks like 2years was full of lies on both parts but the ending was your fault. I cry for nights wishing I was perfect, wishing I was worth it if I.was maybe we will still be together. I have issues but cant blame it on them because its in me. Imight kill […]
So. Its my 20th birthday, yet life isn’t anymore exciting. I tried everything; moving away, moving back, sex, drugs, its all not working. I took the nursing program so my mom would just get off my back. Drew, my boyfriend and I moved into the basment at dads. Its been great for the first few months, but everything is getting so boring and life is becoming so repetetive. Yesturday is clashing with today, and no doubt tomorrow. Well I guess its time to go out, I’m almost 20.
I meet up with Sam and Sie, and I try my most authetic smile, because though they’re […]
i have always hated myself and everything to do with me i cant even look at a photo of myself and i cant seem to do anything right and everyone keeps quitting on me so whats the point in living? sure im only 14 but thats 14 years of pain let me help you understand a little i am a 14 year old girl living in care i have had 6 different placements in seven years and to top it off im bi so nothing seems to be going very well my therapist quit on me today so that makes three of them i have […]
Ive always lied. Everyone does. At first its just the small things. But then it gets bigger.
Im flunking the 8th grade, but my dad thinks im fine.
Ask me if im ok? ill say sure. ill think, bc im ending this soon anyway
my parents are devorsed and just reasently my dad got into another devorce, but i woulnt use that as a reason. A couple years ago I think I cried so much(EVERY FRICKING DAY!!!!UGH!!!) that i cant do that when im sad anymore… I just always have this door in the back of my mind thats shut with all this negative stuff locked up inside. It […]
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