According to my great grandmother i am an Old Soul. My spirit has been here a long time. I have a very strong connection to the spirit world. I see things that no one would ever want to see. Knock it if you want, everyone else thinks i am crazyu anyways. I can see spirits, and not only people i know. I have seen ghostly deaths countless times, i have seen the wraths tear people in half. No one ele can see them, no one i know. I can’t sleep, i haven’t slept for three days now. This will continue until i pass out and […]
I just came across this site this afternoon. It’s actually the exact sort of place I had always looked for before, when the darkness always took over. Any time I googled anything about suicide, it was always for help, for “don’t do it” articles, for getting over depression. I realized somewhere along the way, this isn’t something you “get over”, it is always with us. True, it has been a while (less than a year…which is a very long time for me) since I’ve been there, drowning in that blood-red sea with no sign of hope on the horizon, but it’s still in me. I […]
I can’t keep hoping everything will take a turn. No matter what my therapist or family tell me, I let hope go a long time ago.
I cry because I know the only way out. I cry because I have no future. I cry randomly.
I pop a pill prescribed for panic attacks and anxiety. Klonapin. Oh my.
I shouldn’t have to take a zoloft, 3 buspar and 2 klonapin to get through every day.. So lets take my days away. I want to leave and feel pain. Then I’d feel.. I’d feel happy. Relief. Happy. Relief. Happy. Relief. Happy…? Relief…?
Die.
well its been up and down since i joined this site ,i shared my story , how i was raped , and used , hell im still used by so many of those close to me and it hurts but i lets them cause im hurting myself in the long run.When i joined this site , i had never hurt myself , never tried killing myself , i had only had thoughts about it , i was 14 when i joined up , im now 15 ,16 in 4 months ive tried killing myself twice , and cut myself a few times , ive also […]
That was supposed to work! and it didn’t… all that happened was that got knocked out for a long time… i guess i’ll find a new way to leave this hateful world behind
I’m no longer daddy’s little girl. The princess of his castle. There is no wonder left, no stories of wonderful lands and castles in far away places. Just the terrifying nightmares that haunt me in my sleep. The ones of innocence taken away, the ones of betrayal. Daddy stars in my nightmare and this time he brought friends. Because I have no hope of being successful there’s only one thing I’m good for now.
I stand lost in my nightmare with pain and sadness. I see myself shatter time and time again. And then suddenly I’ve had enough i can take no more pain. I don’t want to feel anymore so I […]
Call me Allen, and im 26, life is shit, I see all these stories about what ppl are going through and i say we all have a choice, I am planning my exit very soon, Im debating whether or not to hang myself (extention cord) or buy an exit bag, I really think the easyest way would be to hang, ive already tryed to see what it would be like, and Its gonna work, I cant Fuk up my suicide,I have to die, anyways, thoughts? Btw im gay and i am so over the whole love thing.. dont try to guilt me or change […]
I don’t know why I am so alone in every way, well actually I suppose I do, it’s just that I have been repressing it for far too long- out it comes now, oh dear:
The people who tell you that things change when people grow up and you go from lower to higher schools and onwards are not always right. People might change, but their attitudes towards those who were once 11 year old outcasts remains… and even if it isn’t verbalised, hostility is an emotion easy to pick up on when directed at you, it truly is. Do you know what it’s like […]
I’ve been thinking deeply about this for s long time and what I’ve come to: I will not be missed here… My time is done… Snd this moment… Is the last. I leave you with this: falling inside the black -skillet My favorite song… One of them. Goodnight snd goodbye sp…
I think that I have been dead for a long time or maybe more enlightened than the rest of the world but I just feel so lost and alone with no one to connect to. Its not that people don’t connect to me, its just that I am wading and others are holding on to me as I am drowning, I don’t know how much longer I can do it.
Life is just luck of the draw
I wish I was luckier. Life has been going down hill for such a long time, and honestly I’m not sure I can endure.
I’m growing so tired, even my health is declining. I feel so sick, and I’m only 18
Life doesn’t seem to hopeful, and its not just because I’m young,
everything in this world is controlled by might, by power, and I, have no power
Sure, everything is in the mind, illusion and manipulation, but honestly I’m so tired
This world is full of the mindless, the uncaring and ignorant
So many horrible things are […]
Hi guys,
I’m just new here at this website and for a long time I keep myself seeking things related to suicide on internet and I got really into it after my life got really sux around six years ago. (I have a really large problem that cannot be solved easily)
Nowadays I hate the major I’ve chosen (since 2005 and I still not graduated!!), my job, where I live, my routine and my completely life. I read many testimonials here today and maybe I decided to start to share what brings me down everyday and my permanent nightmare.
I don’t expect any help from you, but sharing […]
I enjoy life, but life hurts and abuses me. I smile and laugh at the little things, while being degraded and yelled at. I smile every day because I forgive and forget, everyday I am mentally abused and given a new reason to cry. However, I can’t cry with my eyes so my heart hurts for me in exchange for my smile. I laugh and things seem to fade away and release me from my worries, but he knows exactly what to say to crush me.  Everyday I trade my pain for a genuine smile, I let myself forget, I let myself go on without letting it […]
Yesterday was nothing but a dream
It never really happened
When I look outside the window I see nothing but a nightmare
The dreams that I once accepted are now all gone
Just a faded memory
The only time that I’ll wake up from this nightmare
When my prince will come and rescue me
From this prisoned darkness.
The blackest of them all
AÂ pit where infinity goes on forever
AÂ melt down
An angel that will carry me off
Carry my heart with them.
I already miss that feeling.
Darkness and the enemy has taken me away for a long time
It was such an adventure but now
IÂ just want to feel safe
Feel protected
And feel loved
Feel accepted
I want my broken wings to be fixed
IÂ already learned my […]
im trying to force my way through today to be positive, my friend recently moved out of my house and she lives quiet a way away now and i really miss her, my brother also moved even furthur away recently. i really miss being able to easily hang around with them, they were my reasons for waking up, they still are, its just abit more difficult. i feel kind of lost, i like being around people when the black cloud of deppresion isnt horribly distorting who i am. so im going to try and go outside today, even if its just walking around in my […]
I’d like to tell you guys that my friend came back to me with a understanding face and that we made time to work things out. I’d like to tell you that she stood up to her mom and that she gained some independence from her. I’d like to tell you that we’re still friends. But life isn’t always ideal, and sometimes not very kind to those who are patient. I will tell you guys one thing for a fact. I am really happy now.
And that I’m happy I’ve moved on from her. I’ve made some great new friends and have a wonderful boyfriend who […]
How to start,while my hands are shaking and i finally made myself cry after a long time of trying to be strong and keep it all inside me. It sounds like another lame and pathetic story about how misunderstood someone can be. Honestly i had my moments of searching for attention but this time i just want revenge. I promise this will be my last selfish act towards everyone i know. I really wanted to make everything right again but when my own mother says that i am naive and stupid how am i supposed to feel about myself, how i am i supposed to […]
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will break. They will hurt, more than you […]
people keep telling me I deserve to be happy to know I’m a good person.I wish I could believe that. I kept asking if she was happy. she asked me back. I told her I didn’t matter. truth is I knew I was never good enough for her.
how do you let go of the best thing that ever happened to you