I FEEL REALLY LOST AND ALONE, MY HEAD SEEMS TO BE WINNING THE WAR. IM TIRED OF PEOPLE SAYING IT WILL GET BETTER. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO GET OUT OF THIS SITUATION, I NO LONGER HAVE INTERESTS OR HOBBIES, MY FRIENDS ALL HAVE THEIR OWN LIVES, MY GIRLFRIEND IS EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY ABSENT. I HAVE NO ONE TO TALK TO. I CANT ESCAPE MY HEAD AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE. I DONT KNOW HOW TO FIND THE ANSWERS.
Tag:
Lost
One last breathe
Pull it in deep
One more pill
To put me to sleep
25
26
swallow it quick
This pain is restraining
I can’t keep on waiting
I’m lost and confused
I’m done trying to choose
It’s the finale goodbye
The last farewell
I’ll met you all
In that place called hell
I honestly have no idea how I am, who I am or what I’m doing. It’s difficult to have your whole family think you’re an attention seeker because you cut yourself and because you’re depressed and were suicidal. It hurts so much to let people you care about so much down. I hate myself more then anything ever. It’s so hard. When I say it’s so hard I hate myself more for being so weak and pathetic. I’m 16. I have grown up bullied, hit and at one point I was sexually assaulted which I very rarely talk about. I have a boyfriend now, his […]
I once asked my friend what he thought about suicide.He told me “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem”, he told me it was gutless and a cowardly thing to do.
I think it’s the bravest thing anybody could ever do. To end your life and welcome death and look him straight in the eye, i think it’s the bravest thing anybody could ever achieve.
I’ve thought about it, many times, I don’t think there is a person who hasn’t had the thought of ending it all cross their mind in their entire lifetime. I am new to this site but already it’s helping me, every time I look […]
IÂ cut. A lot..
I’ve done it for about a year. I swore to myself I would never harm myself like that, but look where I am now. I have an arm and two ankles covered in scars and cuts. I think of cutting as a stronger way of crying; i feel so weak just bursting into tears, so intsted i cut, it shows i’m strong enough to deal with pain. But now I know I need to stop. People who mean so much to me tell me I need to stop. I’m loosing people because of it. I nearly went to hospital because the bleeding wouldn’t stop. […]
I lost myself in his eyes, I even told him I would marry him and have his baby. It wasnt good enough for him. He found love somewhere else, yet im the *****, im the WHORE, crying alone in the corner. Ive been a shattered jar for years and its never enough to have me apparently, I agree with his malice. Ive taken 27 pills and im really hoping that it works this time, I want to make him happy by saying goodbye. Im no longer a barbie doll, im no longer the apple of his eye. I love you Dean, see you again someday […]
I don’t know why I have felt bad all this time. I don’t even know why I’m currently feeling so down. Looking at my life, you would say that it’s a really good life. Yeah I do have my ups and downs, but I come from a rich family, I have straight A’s in school, I have tons of friends, I’m usually always in a relationship, whether serious or not, I’m an outgoing, friendly person, I get invited to parties, and I’m really athletic. I play basketball, tennis, soccer, and swimming weekly and If I’m not exercising, I’m hanging out with my friends. So why […]
I just dont care about anything anymorr, and i dont have a date set but i have lost everything ive ever wanted and have no reason to keep living, so time is all it takrs.
After all the bullshit, the hospital, etc. I felt no more ‘better’ than I did before all of that crap (read my other posts to find the other shit I have been going through). I actually feel much much worse than before (this post explains most of it).
I was trying to find just one reason to stay alive, and figured I could make one with my XGF. I figured we could try things again. I figured I could stay permanently, and make the kid’s life better. Now that she has no chance, the poor kid will go through “father” after “father” after “father”. She claims […]
hi guys… Im Elico (I despised my real name so I use this…
Im gay… Hehe, though I people find it hard to believe I am one since thay say Im a ‘good actor’ or something…
I dont have friends… I guess Im a natural loner or whatever… But I waited and looked, no one was there… I trusted several people, but all where the same, some abandon me after myself confessign to them, some got simply tired as I was clingy… some, just… stopped.
Dont ask if I have a lover or whatever, Im ugly maybe… and somehow I lost interest in stuff liek that…
Family? Theyre all […]
I am lost and the damage has been done.
Is it mad
Am I really just insane
Talking about the past
I can’t seem to stop
The tragic pain
Just wont recover
The past
Just trapped
Trying to fix it
But cannot
They always want answers
Everyone always just wanted answers
I’m trying to give them
But they just don’t understand
They just wont listen anymore
I wish to be free from the past
I wish to be away
I think I am much more insane than I was before
Anxiety and depression taking over my soul
and body
Everything good or bad
Now just the way of life
I’m normally OK, living my life each day as it comes. But once in awhile there is something inside my head (something not SOMEONE) trying to control me. Making me feel useless, upset and like I have no purpose in this world. Its like a big black shadow trying to tear me away from my life, my son, my family. I can only fight it for so long. Its strong, stronger than I am at times. It hurts me. It never leaves but I can ignore it or quiet it for awhile but it always comes back. It wants me to die and it wont […]
I can’t do it anymore. Or can I? Even my own brain can’t decide what it wants  anymore. I use to be happy, I used to enjoy life but not it seems that that enjoyment is more and more fleeting. I seem to have about 1 good day in life every month, but even that seems to be becoming a struggle. Everything I had in life I lost, everything that was good and worth living for was lost. The only man who I have ever loved broke up with me for someone else, I lost my job due to a serious knee injury whilst playing […]
she is mad because she can’t control me, she gets with guys to control them and when they break up with her she tries to go to Church to control that!
If you’ve followed my posts you would know exactly the type of person she is.
She lies about everythin . She brainwashed me into running away from my grandma and running away from CPS only to call on me to get me intoruble. But I kept coming back thinking what she said was the truth , that she wanted to be a mother for once. Ever since I ran away to be with my mom, she […]
i’ve had so many troubles throghout my life. loved ones dying, friendship brake ups, cheating, agressions, sexual harsments, lies, broken promises. yeah it may seem like they are little reasons but they sure were powerful enough to weaken me little by little. though i haven’t lost it all. i still have faith, hope, & love. even if i have hate, grudges, and disappointments as well. & even if i want to die, i still have hope to have desire to live. i have my lovely family that truthfully love me, few friends that love me and appriciate me. i have that idea to live for […]
Hello ,
I’m Desiree . 14 . sc . and I’m new to this. I’m contemplating on alot. My life is one big fat LIE … One big fat JOKE … and to be honest ; that’s all it’ll ever be. Things are going through my head right now … and it’s driving me crazy. I have NO ONE to talk to … I’m alone , lost , confused … Try living with 4 OTHER people in your house and none of them realize that all you ever are is sorry for making them so miserable. It’s 6:09 in the morning here and theres no one up […]
My mom raised me all on her own. I Love her and everything but my dad I dont understand why he left my mom said he left as soon as I was born my whole life I blamed myself for my dad leaving my mom. every now & then when he comes around I can never bring up why he left cause he never has time for me. He never pays child support but yet can support two kids instead of me & my brother. I dont understand why hes so cruel I stood up for him my whole life while my mom & her […]
u say u love me more then ur life
u say im the girl u will eventually mary
u say u will never forget me
u say im the best gf u have eva had
u say how strong ur love for me is
u say im beautiful
u say u would do anything for me
til u decided im worth nothing cuz now i got my phone and ipod taken away 4ever u want NOTHING to do with me. u say if we cant text or call there is no point in making an effort.
WHY did u say all those things […]
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where have i gone wrong?Â
my deep decent into depression is worse than i thought possible. i have literally lost my mind. ive driven myself mad. i dont know whats real anymore,i cant concentrate. i daydream consistently, i cant controll it, its like ny mind is trying ti escape reality. its become so severe i struggle to tell if im actually imagining it or its really happening. im so insecure, i have no friends, my family disownes me, treats me like absolute shit. im so very alone, not a single person to talk to, but thats just reality. i dont sleep anymore, i just lay in […]