Some don’t notice, some will ask, so I tell them its my past.
I cut I lie, at night I cry, sometimes I just want to die.
You say I’m suicidal, emo, a “freak†but society has just made me weak.
they don’t understand why we cut and cry they think we attention seek
but its really there fault they just don’t know that we’re hanging off a peak.
a cut a lie a cry at night, sometimes we just want to die, we try we try
oh yes we try to hide whats under our sleeves..
none will notice none will care they have […]
Tag:
no one
You thought you could control me and you did, you still do. One thing I want most in life is to become the bigger person, and be able to forgive and forget. Why is it that you make this so impossible for me. I hate you with every inch of my being, my core, soul, or whatever it is that comprises this sad excuse of a human being that I am.
Every hit you gave, physical or emotional, scarred me to an extent which I am ashamed to admit. No one should have such control over another human being like you do with me. I see […]
My best friend (were both girls) this weekend kissed me. We both like each other a lot. And we know about it. But i just told her lets not do it again Because i don’t wanna ruin our friendship. I just ruined it though by telling her shes mad at me now. Its hurts a lot. I ruined our friendship, I ruined it. Shes the best thing that’s ever happened to me. But she deserves better. I want to go to sleep and never wake up. No one will ever be able to love me. Â I push everyone away. I’m a terrible person. Her heart […]
I’m alone again
I don’t know when this will end
I don’t know how long I can take it
I woke up today
My heart was beating so loud
Like it was taunting me
Saying that I should die
Saying that the sound of my heartbeat makes people cringe
I try to look on the bright side
But is there on anymore?
For the occasional sunset or sunrise there really isn’t a bright side
The person I fell for will never like me back
The people I give love will never truly love me back
The people I comfort will never really comfort me back
I feel like I’m nearing the end. I am trying my hardest to hold on. I started cutting. I’m drinking and oversleeping again.
I tried to talk to my therapist but she mentioned something about ‘not losing my license’ and the deep sighing is all starting to make me feel like she’s frustrated with me.
I am certain no one dislikes me more than I dislike myself. When I feel that someone I respect becomes irritated with me then I just embrace self-hate that much more.
If your own shrink is done with you then why would I keep trying?
I want to be happy. I want to be […]
I claw at the mental door of pain, blocking me from happiness
I scream out, hoping that maybe, just maybe, someone would hear me
I don’t give up, I scream and yell, I yell, “HELP I’M TRAPPED! PLEASE HELP!”
But alas no one can hear me even if someone did they wouldn’t help me nor would they care.
I sob until I drown myself with my own tears and hurt myself with my own pain
I try to pry the door open, to see just a sliver of light, just a sliver of the bright happiness I once knew
I desperately try to find something, or […]
Every day I wake up to go to school so I can get yelled at by coaches,staff,even students. I feel that if just disappeared, no-one would care because to them, I’m just some random goat they yell at.
By legitimate, I don’t mean legal. Obviously, most people here are going through some type of (intense) pain. What I mean is, are there circumstances, both internal and external to an individual, which a group of mature, impartial observers would agree are so unbearable, and so unlikely to be changed, that suicide is a rational choice, maybe even a compassionate one ?
I once met someone who said that no one should commit suicide before 40, because s/he hadn’t lived enough to know what his/her possibilities were.
And not I’m talking about the sanctity of life issue, which being a religious/personal one, can never be decided on […]
Fairytales aren’t real … the stories you read in the books when you were little , they’re all lies to. There’s no happy ending , no prince charming and there’s no one there to save you when you need to be rescued. There’s just the darkness and its there to eat you alive , to remind you that your life sucks. It pushes you until you break down , it breaks you until you are completely broken. People say that if you fall 10 times you get back up 11 times well here’s the thing … that darkness knocks you down 12 more times. Sooner or […]
I’m angry and anxious 24/7. I think about killing people all the time. Usually the homeless; no one would miss them in their absence. Sometimes children–isn’t the world overpopulated enough? I hate what I’ve become. Even my cat isn’t safe. I feel like I’m losing my soul to madness.
on dec 3rd of 2004 2 years after my grandmother past away and i was dealing with bullies, school, and family problems.My brother just told our parents that he was gay, now you can imagine what mom and dad were going through, well that night they had went out and i was home alone i found a box cutter and hid it in my room. well after mom and dad left i wrote the note made sure i told them i loved them, and i filled the sink with hot water and put both wrist in the water after grabbing the box cutter and placing […]
No one knows and no one can see. I cant cry anymore only gag and rock myself until I stop moaning the pain away. Its silly how we can fall so rapidly and just realize this once we have the pills and alcohol at the ready. How did it come to this? “I just want you to get better so you can stop hurting everyone else.” he said. Why did he say it? They sent me somewhere where I was supposed to get better. I said it made me better. In reality they blew my head off. Its terrible thing, lying. What can I do […]
I miss how I used to be.
I never really liked myself before, but at least I was happy. At least I didn’t feel empty inside. At least I felt like somebody important. I enjoyed hanging out with my friends and family. I even enjoyed having time to myself. I actually cared about how I spent my time. I didn’t dread every second of every day. I actually wanted to inspire and impress people with what I achieved in my life.
But now I just want to do nothing. I could careless about about anything.
I just want to give up….
I just wish my life would end. No […]
Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And the worst part is there’s no one else to blame
Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me
Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I’ve lost myself again and I feel unsafe
Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me
Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold […]
So I turned to this blog last June in the hope of relieving myself of some my bottled up stories and emotions. It helped for all of 10 seconds. I’m still a closet gay (by my family’s demand and not my choice). My family would have me locked in a cage if they could, they have recently told me I’m the biggest problem my family has. I’m at university now so I’ve had a little bit of free time to experiment and be me. But being me has come at the price of my family and their respect. When I came out they took it […]
I never asked to be here, nor did I ask to be a burden. You can only give so much of yourself before nothing left. I cant scream or clinch my fists anymore, you wanna talk bout it no one listens, or cares think its a joke. They say theirs light at the end of the tunnel but always stuck in reverse. Maybe finally get the balls to eat the bullet until then more waiting and wondering…
I just miss and crave the not so occasional drinks that would lead to reckless behavior because at this moment when I want to feel something I can’t bring myself to do anything about it. I’m not suicidal but I know that what I am feeling leads up to it. And no one can know. Everyone had their life together again but me. I feel so alone. I literally don’t feel like I belong in my own skin. I don’t like anything that I am right now or have become these past few months.
I had a really good day today. I took my close friend home and then went bowling with my mom. Then had a rec cheer game. The only thing I have to say is I felt as though no one was themselves. Like they were there physically but mentally they were somewhere else. I tried to ignore it but it still stuck out to me.
I wish to be a part of earths journey where people don’t need to visit sites like sp
by addicted
written by addicted
If this is how humans live on this planet, I don’t want to be part of it.
My conscience says that our life can be way better. Each human that sprouts on this earth is special. And has right to get all things that human race developed till now. But it’s not happening.
The first and foremost one must do ” strive for intelligent human beings on earth”. Â or at least let dumb ones know the fact ” He is dumb and don’t deserve to extend his genre”
intelligent: If problems comes, find a best or innovative solution that no one had thought.Â
dumb: If problems comes, suicide or a poetic […]
its done
its said
im gone
im dead
no one misses me
nobody notices
what was the point
im better where im at
if i see a tear
i know its not for me
i wont be in the way anymore.
goodbye