I never thought that the people i watched on the tv in health class could one day be me. I never thought i would feel so helpless that i would want to die. But i do…and have attempted sciucide three times, each time i have either been stopped by someone, or it just didnt work. I think that this depression, or feelings of depression came about the start of my 9th grade year. Everyone has a group of friends, i was too unsocial to join one and now im too late, everyone always says; oh wow your so funny or you crack me up, but […]
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Parents
I’m 13 years old. I would tell you my name, but being new here, I don’t know if I can trust you all to that extent yet. Normally, I post poems that reflect how I feel at the moment, or how I felt throughout the day, but right now I’d like to get a few things off my chest. I’ve told a few of my friends some of this before, but no one knows all of it at its worst. I feel as though I can trust all of you with at least this, even if I don’t know you. So here it goes.
My story:
I found this site about a year ago on my sister’s laptop. She was 15 then, and it was exactly three weeks before her 16th birthday. She’d declined my parents the joy of setting up a “sweet 16” party for her, because she didn’t want to give them the joy of setting it up. Then on her 16th birthday, she killed herself. I never got to ask her about the site, or why she always did everything she could to make our parents angry, now it doesn’t even matter. I don’t know if she had an account, I only know the site appeared on her […]
I guess it started when I was born. I’m currently writing incredibly bluntly, please bear with it. I’m immensely bitter, especially right now. The state I’m in right now is disjointed and confusing and I just don’t understand anything of my thoughts, I thought maybe writing my story out would help.
Right, so I guess it started when I was born. So really, just this family. I’ve been abused as a kid. I don’t realize this until now. I didn’t understand this as abuse, and I was a child who only knew their parents to be right. I didn’t really understand the concept of having your […]
It was only the first time.
I spun the blade around in my hands
contemplating if I should really do this or not.
I heard my mom yell.
Yes, I should, It’s worth it.
The blade sank into my arm,
cutting across my arm.
Not too deep.
It was only the second time.
The kids at school were bullies.
My parents just got mad.
I took the blade in my hands.
I didn’t even think about it.
I pushed it into my arm,
cutting across parallel to the last one,
A little deeper.
It was at least the 50th time.
I didn’t even have different reasons anymore.
First sorry if you don’t understand I’m chilean..
Since last year I want to faint me.. Maybe my parents notice that I have problems… That I’m not giving supply ( I can’t handle this anymore) cutting, wishing to take a pill and don’t wake up never again.. Is normal?
I was normal before… But something change me as a person (psychology talking) and I’ve noticed that we don’t notice when the things start until there’s no turning back.. And you will never feel that great again.. Your past will always be there to remember you your mistakes..
Maybe fainting me things will change…
Please if […]
It helps to talk on here about my bad experience at college. Not only was the bullying embarrassing, but what hurt even more is how my father bullied me and his unrealistic, amoral, and unethical definitions of success. I hated that year of my life and I hated being psychologically bullied.
I feel like at college, I was a completely different person than I was at the amusement park. At the amusement park, I moved out of my parents’ house and said “This is my thing that I have looked forward to all my life. I want to be here and I am going to make […]
This is my first time on here, so i think i should telll you my past. when i was younger i was a really happy kid. my whole life was laughter. untill my parents divorced, they both remarried i was an only child but now my dad has 3 girls and my one sister is deaf and another has a hole in her heart. To make it worse my aunt, my bestfriend just passed away unexpectedly and my house just bunrt down… i used to self harm really badly but i learned to stop. i now have eating problems, in the last 3 days i […]
My parents are trying to start fostering children. I know it’s good for the community and such, but i dont want another kid in my house. Â i already dont feel safe as it is. and with another kid here i’ll just be that kid who gets ignored. they already dont listen to me as much as i wish they would. ive tried to explain to them that im depressed and i want help but they always find a new topic to talk about. i want my parents to love me like my friends’ parents love them. instead they just make me feel like im doing […]
When I was seven years old, my mom was diagnosed with stage three terminal brain cancer. shortly after her surgery Hurricane Rita hit. We moved around for about two years. In 2010, my moms cancer came back at stage four and my parents told me she would die. That summer i stopped eating, i ran for three hours a day, and i cut myself. After my mom died, school was hard. I kept cutting myself.
hi my name is umair ad i am 21 years old my story of life is very unique when i was 5 year old my cousin said me that she loves me she was just 4 years old and now our love is 17 years old this is very strange we started to love each other when we did not know the meaning of love but i think we started to love because we born for each other i was living very happy life with her but at the start of this year my cousin told me  that her parents are looking for a good boy […]
Sometimes all we really want to do is shut out the world. Crawl into our bed, pull the blankets over our heads, and blast some depressing songs. I can completely relate to this. My parents say that i need to get out more and i need to come out of my room more frequently but my room is my sanctuary. It’s where i feel the safest. My blades, my “Torture Toys”, my laptop, my phone.. these are all in my room.
My boyfriend used to wonder why i dont talk much or why i look sad all the time. he didnt understand that i had just […]
ok i’m 15 and well, i just don’t want to deal with this anymore, i’m massively bullied at school, i cut, i’ve been attacked on the way home loads of times, my parents don’t seem to care and to be honest nor do i anymore, i just want to end it all but i don’t want any more pain
I’m afraid to go to school because all I get is called names over and over again. I get physically bullied too by both guys and girls, and that is not ok! No one ever believes me when I tell them that this is happening. I come home everyday with bruises on me and I usually bleed some times too. I go home to my parents where all they say is get over it. I feel lost and scared.
Sure, I’d LOVE to talk to someone about my problems. Simply LOVE to.
by OddOneOut
written by OddOneOut
But who’s gonna listen? You? You, the one who comes up to me with a sickly sweet voice saying “What’s wrong?”, and when I tell you, all you have to say is “You need some help, go talk to someone!” before walking the fuck away. That’s the sort of shit that makes people like me NOT talk, you inconsiderate son of a *****.
Everyday, every night, I’m looking. Looking all around me, at my Facebook account, at my Skype, at my phone contacts book, at my god damn life. And always wondering, “Who’s ever gonna listen to me?”.
No-one, that’s who. And the ironic thing is […]
I’m a very sensitive person. I just don’t understand how people can be so mean to people they don’t even know. Or being mean in general. You all know the saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” But they do hurt, they hurt more then sticks and stones. I don’t know how to stop the words from entering my mind even after pushing them out. Words like; annoying, *****, lazy, fat, ****, mean, slut, whore. I have been called every single one. I tried to stop cutting but I cant.
I don’t have anyone to talk to. My sister […]
Everybody lies, right? Like we all make mistakes and tell lies once in a while. But I seriously messed up. When I was really suicidal, my sister helped me threw it. She didn’t know how I wanted to die, but she became my bestfriend. The other day, we got into a huge fight, and I told my parents that she had sex and did drugs. and they confronted her and I lied and said that I didn’t tell them. But I did. And I think she knew I did too. She hasn’t talked to me for a while and without her I’m afraid that I […]
All my parents do is make me feel like im not good enough. im sorry i cant be their perfect child. It’s hard trying to keep them happy.
My friends have all became distant. I sit alone on the bus and at lunch. None of them understand. I’ve tried telling them but they dont help. Only i can help myself, i understand that. but i dont know how. im lost.
I told my boyfriend my whole story once. the reason i started cutting. why im suicidal. why im always crying when he calls me late at night. I told him all of my secrets. He made me […]
You wouldn’t think that the girl that laughs the loudest has the most trouble. She’s secretly so unhappy sometimes. Like a dam breaking emotions would take control of her and make her be unable to break free. This doesn’t happen all the time. She does have some friends that are there for her. Friends that make her laugh and smile, but they don’t know. Nobody knows.
She’s quite pretty actually, a small cute nose, nice lips and big brown eyes. Her body says more, a curvy figure. She would seem perfect to those who just meet her. While she thinks that she is the fattest thing that […]
got caught.
so scared.
stupid doctors.
i went to one, just a check-up
with my parents
the other day
and when she did that fabric around your arm
that squeezes
well before she did it really
she had to tell me
“roll up your sleeve.”
in my head i was
“goddamngoddamngoddamn”
and trying to find a way out of doing what
she told me to do.
i couldn’t
so i just rolled up my sleeve.
this was not one of the ways
i imagined the finding out.
my mom gasped
as the nurse wrapped the
stupid
scratchy
cold
fabric around my upper arm
and said
“what happened to […]