I’m 15 and sad. I know these dark thoughts are bad and I should get help but I honestly don’t want to depend on anyone for my weakness. I don’t know whether im depressed or just sad… all I know is that I feel empty and really dark all the time. I don’t remember when this all started and I don’t know when im getting better. I have self-harmed before and I still do. I remember the first time I took a blade to my wrist I was only 12. At an age like that I should have been happy and going out playing in the sun. […]
Tag:
Period Of Time
My appointment is roughly 24 hours away and it will be the first time I’ve gone to a therapist/doctor – now I’m wondering: if I mention my recent failed attempt(s) and my true thoughts will they commit me to hospital? Â My attempt a week ago failed then two days later I was thwarted by a recently installed fence preventing me to simply hop into an exit.
The appointment is with a psychologist however, she works with a psychiatrist in the same office. Â Honestly, I’m not even sure how I’ll feel speaking to this individual even though she was quite comforting during the initial telephone call so […]
It has come to my attention that a particular person has been cyber bullying young girls on this site, i have no way of knowing if it is particular disclosed to this site alone or not, but here- in it is a big issue on here. and there maybe a lot of people on here doing it, i have no way of knowing. so i am going to write this purely on the facts that i have accumulated over a set period of time. this said person be-friends these girls and convinces them to talk privately with him or to play online games with him, […]
Okay, this will be long winded. I’m sorry.
I’m 22 years old. For the past ten years, I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety. I’ve been officially diagnosed with severe depression, severe anxiety, severe social anxiety and borderline post traumatic stress disorder.
I’ve been through a lot in my life, but I’ll make it short. As a kid, my mom was a pot head and she slept all day while my dad worked two jobs, only seeing him for about 15 minutes a day. Thus, I was left alone a lot as a kid with my brother. My parents eventually split up and my siblings and I […]
In the last week or two, I have been taken to the hospital for breaking down in class and revealing my suicide plan to the guidance councillor. I could say that I was surprised, but I wasn’t. The moment I said, “the fact of the matter is that I am suicidal,” I knew I was screwed. So, my parents were notified and I was shown the doors of the ER. However, I was able to avoid admittance, if only barely, by bravely lying my way out. On the exact same day I planned to kill myself, I smiled, laughed, and maintained my composure. So it’s only […]
   A bigot is defined in the online Oxford English Dictionary as:
a person who has very strong, unreasonable beliefs or opinions about race, religion or politics and who will not listen to or accept the opinions of anyone who disagrees.
Why do such people still exist in this world? Haven’t we, as a race, grown up into our adulthood yet, the civilised versions of our cave dwelling former selves? I’m thinking no.
A few weeks ago, while walking to visit my grandparents, my partner and I happened to pass by a group of older teens who were talking about the young man and woman who’d […]
Can’t stop thinking about this shit, have to write it or I’ll do something really fucking stupid
by fibsequence
written by fibsequence
I have been having suicidal thoughts lately
Seems like the easiest way out…..yet I’ve seen how suicide affects my friends, and I don’t want them to feel the pain of going through that ever again
So I’m stuck in an endless loop of torturing myself
I don’t fear death, I embrace it
Why fear something you know nothing about? It could be the best thing that ever happened to you
I am ugly, and all people ever seem to care about is how a person looks
Even if one of my friends is eyeing someone, they always judge them based on what they look like, and involve me
Even I’m guilty of […]
well as start i never thought that what happened to me exceed others pain,always seemed to me meanless and i always say,for God sake why i’m depressed
my depression came from my past,cuz when i was a child i always been sexually abused by my uncles,i felt dirty and sick,i always tried to tell it to my family but they never cared(until now i’am still being abused)and like this i started to have feeling for girls because everytime a guy touch me i feel disgusted and sick but with girls it was the apposit of it,well i won’t say that i’ am lesbian it was just […]
today i took a bath. its funny how you forget how much you love something until your denied it for such a period of time. all day at work i wished to be home in my tub. alone with the warm bubbly water. relaxed. i could drown if i wanted to. itd be easy. i could make a slice in my arm because i remember how my situation in life would be put on hold,as i count out the things i hate about myself in my own skin.
i really dont want to do this anymore. but for now i will just enjoy the water. […]
sooo during the field trip on Thursday I realized Lois-one of my very best friends was ignoring me. Throughout the day I figured out that she was telling all of my friends lies about me… She turned three of them against me. The other two are loyal and had the common sense to talk to me about it. And they know I am not the kind of person that would do the things she said I was doing. So in one day I lost four of the closest friends I’ve ever had. And it wouldn’t hurt that much if I wasn’t able to see the […]
Someone for a short period of time brought my soul back from the deeps of nothingness and I was able to feel again. Isn’t that suppose to be a good thing? I hate it! I wish that person would have never touch my sleeping soul if only to throw it away! I just want to crawl back into the nothingness and feeling less. But the probably is it hurts just like last time to crawl back in the water. Just like it hurt to crawl out. Why did you bother?! You brought me more pain than joy! Can’t I just be left alone?! I had […]
I have a friend.
Well, yeah, I guess you could call her a friend. Her name is Margie, or at least that is what I’ve always called her.
The first time I met her she was nice. I liked her. Even had a crush on her for a period of time.
She was my freshman homecoming date, but only as friends.
We went to a football game a few weeks after that. Her and two other friends of ours.
She smoked weed. But I didn’t know that until we were in the forest behind the bleachers with a group of people, passing around a bowl.
I think it was a bowl. […]
I am a 22 year old male currently considering suicide. I have depression, as well as a bout of terrible luck. But I can’t die yet. Not until I’ve at least gotten to spill my guts somewhere. So I’m doing this as an experiment. I can’t vent to anyone in my close circle of friends, because I have constructed such an elaborate facade, I’m not sure if they’d even take it seriously. So I figure doing so anonymously will be just as cathartic.
My parents got divorced when I was four. It is the first memory I have. It was not a pleasant divorce, to say […]
Dear whomever this may concern, or those who may care,
You are probably wondering right now what you may have done to prevent this or if you even could. The answer is maybe, thought probably not, this decision in the end will be all mine and not yours, so no, it was probably going to happen eventually. I know that you are probably asking yourself why? Well, that is a very easy question to answer. It is because no matter how much people love you and try their best to give you solace, it is not enough to satisfy someone if they feel utterly alone in […]
Note
Tonight, I am going to end my life. What follows is the only memorandum I will leave in my absence. Forgive me for the lengthiness of this ‘note’, but just in case there are those who are left confused or puzzled by the decision have I have taken, this writing should clarify the choice I have made.
For the best part of 20 years I have been physically and mentally abused by my family, namely my mother and sister. For the past two or so years, I have been living alone (but not independently), and for the past year I have been, health-wise, in a state […]
Every now and then I catch myself getting lost in my thoughts. I know Im not the only one, but at times I feel that I do it more than some. My paranoia will kick in, I start getting lost in the thoughts, and ideas that it brings. I catch myself thinking that this and that are true, but deep down I KNOW that they are NOT true. This has gotten worse within the past couple of years. I know that the thoughts I have are not true, but I often think what if that is, what if that will happen? When this first occured […]
My name is Joe, I live in England and I am training to be a hairdresser. I started my training two months ago, I am 19 years old.
I’ll be honest with you my life so far has not been easy, like the majority of people in this world I’ve faced issues and encountered problems which has hurt me, which is fine bad things happen. I was bullied at school, people made fun of my physical appearance a lot, and I didn’t fit in with the popular crowd. I hanged out with the more geeky group, and didn’t mind it, I got on well, but as time went […]
If I had a gun right now, I wouldnt be typing this.. i would be dead. Unluckily for me, I live in Ireland.
There is nothing wrong with my life and nothing that I cant change.I just lack the motivation to do whats best for myself and use my talents. I know where im going wrong but I choose to do nothing. Im the only one at fault, I dont blame the world for my own lack of effort. The truth is that life just bores me… learn to drive, get a job, buy a house, get married, have kids and die. That pretty much […]
Its hard to agree with others when they say i need mental help. I have been through so much, suicide is the only way out. To be honest i have had so many suicide attempts, i lost count. I’ve been put through so much help. I just want to be loved. Is that too much to ask for? My life started failing for me when i was about 5. I used to get molested by my older next door neighbor. Its hard trying to write all of this down when i have tears in my eyes, its a hard topic for me to speak about, […]
I feel like breaking down into hysterical sobs but I can’t because I have some semblance of a life to lead.
I’m so shocked that I’m here again, depressed and feeling antsy. I’ve been recording a lot of material the last few days and it’s been wonderful; I feel so proud that I was able to complete so much in such a short period of time, especially since I was raised to procrastinate. I’ve been satisfying my “artists spirit” and the hours just float by. I get really bad hunger cramps because I’m so focused on my shit that I skip dinner. Things have been going […]
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