I wanna kill myself tonight , i wanna slip away from sadness. Be forever done with feeling like the room is getting small the air getting thicker and theres more room on the floor i can breath better. But i cant freak out in front of them. So i hold it in. Im dead inside i dont want to feel anymore.
Tag:
Sacrifice
I don’t know if anybody is going to read this, I don’t know how this works, but I hope it helps me…
I’ve been having a lot of problems at home, with my dad being mad at my mom and I, barely acknowledging that we live there too. There is just too much tension and I just can not take it anymore. So I decided to give my father a reality check, something that will show him the consequences of his actions. He either changes for good (I hope), or I’ll learn he never loved me.
I decided to sacrifice my life.
I hope my decision doesn’t sound selfish, […]
http://play.textadventures.co.uk/games/cdf3rzcv60mbayjia3paig/Sacrifice3.html
I don’t know, I just felt like writing something. It takes about 5-10 minutes to play through the whole thing, so whoever does so: Please tell me whether you liked it or not.
Please, please, forgive me
But I won’t be home again
Maybe someday you’ll look up
And barely conscious, you’ll say to no one
“Isn’t something missing?
You won’t cry for my absence, I know
You forgot me long ago
Am I that unimportant?
Am I so insignificant?
Isn’t something missing?
Isn’t someone missing me?
Even though I’m the sacrifice
You won’t try for me, not now
Though I’d die to know you love me
I’m all alone
Isn’t someone missing me?
Please, please, forgive me
But I won’t be home again
I know what you do to yourself
I breathe deep and cry out
“Isn’t something missing?
Isn’t […]
People say that Im one of the last person on earth that dosent have a cold heart that sacrifice her self for anybody that always wanna help
but I dont see my self like that I dont even know who I am
I just caved and wrote to the wrong person.
It had been a while, but i know that writing is at best futile, and at worst, potentially problem-causing.
But just the other day, i had a series of “seemingly connected experiences,” which resulted in… memories, thoughts, feelings i just couldn’t shake, and they wanted control… and i lost that battle. Maybe i forfeited. Maybe i hate my vulnerability so much that i lash out at any little thing that might expose or exploit it. When something is going to hit you where it hurts, the only “right way” to react, is to “go all in,” and either […]
It doesn’t hurt to grow up poor. It doesn’t hurt when your daughter is born with medical problems. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your father died. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your step-father died. It doesn’t hurt when you sacrifice happiness for duty. It doesn’t hurt having your dog put down. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your grandmother died. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your “other†mother died. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your uncle died. It doesn’t hurt when you sacrifice happiness for others. It doesn’t hurt watching others destroy what you built. It […]
Well, I don’t like to say the word “suicide” because it has always had negative connotations in my life. My family is comprised of a bunch of cold-hearted, sarcastic Argonauts with strong wills and drive, so we see suicide as pathetic. And the twist: I’ve felt suicidal since day one. The inner conflict of the way I was raised and the way I feel is certainly nothing short of overwhelming. I’ve always wanted different things from the people around me and consequentially I’ve felt stifled, suppressed, and unwelcome in my environment for years. I have very few friends, and the ones I do have I […]
Deafening echoes reverberate off the walls.
Walls painted black by years of neglect.
Walls forming a very small room.
With a floor made of long-lost dreams and aspirations.
No door.
No window.
No light.
Beautiful.
In the center of the room, I sit.
Unable to think clearly.
Why is it so loud?
I only need a moment of peace.
What I wouldn’t give for a moment of peace.
Unable to open my eyes, for fear of what I might see.
And when I finally muster the courage, I wish that I hadn’t.
Filth.
That’s all I see around me.
People living meaningless lives.
Blissfully ignorant.
Secure in their […]
Sometimes life can get pretty exhausting. And yes, that is an understatement. My stack of homework pushed aside for the moment, I try to relax.
The only light in my room is my lamp from my desk, which creates a low yellow glow. The only sounds are the hum of my computer, the typing of the keys, and my cat cleaning herself. In this quiet environment, she can be a racket. Especially when she purrs. I normally bring her with me when I need the comfort. I just want to feel wanted tonight, even if it’s only coming from a cat.
Her purr sounds like kernels popping, vibrating […]
“Love breeds sacrifice, which breeds hatred. Then you can know pain”
I am 20 and a student at stevens institute of technology for mechanical engineering. i dont know why i feel like this, it all started last year around christmas time. i began to feel very depressed but i treated it like everything else about me i dont like, i covered it up. It escalated over that semester and through the summer. now im in my third semester and im slipping to the point of failure in every class. if i dont pass all of these classes i will be asked to not return to the school, which is not an option. Ive pledged a fraternity and they […]
i cant stand that he still gets to walk around. he still gets to drink his beer sit on his fat ass walk around like he owns everyone spend all day on the computer stalking people on facebook. i cant stand that he will never be held accountable for the hell he made me experience and for ruining my life. all i feel is a very deep hatred that goes beyond what my body can contain. i hate having to see him. i wish i would never see him again. the problem is that my mother is still married to him and i love and […]
I would happily die for anyone. I would happily sacrifice my life for the life of another without a second thought. Yeah, there’s loads in my life worth dying for; but there’s very little worth living for. But does that matter? I suppose I should just embrace the fact that although it’s not a lot to live for and the temptation’s always there, there is something keeping me here, there must be something worth living for or else I wouldn’t still be here. I believe that. I really believe that. And that gives me a bit more strength and reminds me that although it all […]
So another day has come and past, another pointless, meaningless empty feeling remains and all that is left is the cold embrace of an empty bed.
5 Suicide attempts, 2 last minute resuscitations in hospital, endless weeks in a psychiatric unit and each and every time come out feeling the same way and return to the same emptiness and nothingness that is my life. Medications make me feel numb, neither happy nor sad, just more of that feeling of nothingness, again. It is so ironic that ALL antidepressants just make you docile, slow, bored and unable to feel anything of meaning. I have decided that with […]
In the vision there is wisdom, In the wisdom there is great power, the power is gained through flexibility and sacrifice cant you see??? Now go to the next time in the future, When in the past it was a problem and notice whats different now:)