My life has finally come crashing down once again. So much has happened in the last 48hrs, too much to handle, and it’s too late to fix anything. I feel so overwhelmed right now. I fucked up. In so so many ways I have fucked up. 48hrs is so short, but trust me, I’m too late.
I’ve been manic for the past 2+ weeks but on a major come down and feel absolutely crap I saw my cpn yesterday when I was bad with my voices and his coming again on Friday.
I’m so fed up with how I am I just car’t deal with it I don’t mind being minic as I’m happy but that the only time I am
I’ve got a loving family and bf who cares I just don’t want to hurt them but if things don’t change I know i will I’ve suffered from mental illness since I was 15 I’m now 25 I just don’t […]
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This is a series of photos that I took recently in some off the wall attempt at expressing exactly what goes on in my mind. I feel so blinded, but the moment the blindfold is removed, I rgret it. I […]
Hi.is anyone here interested in writing stories for short films?.i’ve been trying to write some on my own but i couldn’t.i just write stories abstractly then i’ll abandon that story in the middle.i think i can do better if i have a partner…so if anyone’s interested then, here is my mail…blogchs@gmail.com…!
https://soundcloud.com/musikchoice027/jose-gonzalez-stay-alive
There’s a lot of posts that go through here, so I expect that the people who read this post didn’t read my earlier one… I promised to say something if I somehow didn’t go through with my suicide. Well, long story short, my ex-girlfriend stopped me, and said to me that she ‘loves me’ and ‘cares’ about me deeply. I knew in the back of my mind that she had to say that whether it was true or not, and my gut told me it wasn’t. However, my heart needed to cling onto anything in that moment to help me survive. After going to the […]
”Does it make you sad to know that life is more than who we are?” – GGD
The answer to that, yes. Not because I think my life holds anymore value than the next. We are here as a vapor. We are nothing but a wave in the vast seas. So many waves have already come, and so many more will replace ours. In 1-200 years we probably won’t even be a distant memory. We won’t matter. What’s sadder is knowing I don’t matter now, in the presence. If I did, surely those around me would realize my struggle to find any form of hope in […]
I have this terrible habit. I’ve never actually gotten the courage to take a knife and slash my skin so that is not it. Instead I bite at my fingers until they bleed. My fingers ache right now because I’m typing. They really hurt after I wash my hands or am in the shower because they prune up and are useless to use. Since the layers vary depending on where I bite, the flesh underneath my first layers is exposed. This exposure makes them more sensitive so I can barely touch anything. My parents think I have a common nail biting habit but I rarely […]
So, I am very new to this, but I have read a lot of these. My life doesn’t seem to make a blip on the radar of all the other people out there who struggle. But, no matter how small I feel about these things, they still hurt. I mean, I am so depressed that I don’t want to move, I don’t want to think, and most days, I don’t even want to be alive. I used to write stories, and poems, and even used to keep a journal updated daily, but lately, I haven’t wanted to do anything. My parents say that all of this is my fault, […]
In my algebra class a couple of boys and girls that you’d typically catagorize as ‘popular’ decided to bully me today. I’m not weak, and I wouldn’t ever let up that I was. I can take some taunting and not act out in any way because I feel like i’m mature enough not to. Well, one of the girls in that circle decided to attack a sensitive area of mine, the history of my family. Calling my mom a whore and making fun of our financial problems. I wont get into exact details of what she said, but let’s just say I ended up in […]
I have had postpartum depression for a few months now aggravated to suicidal ideation by medications. In a short period of time, my world fell apart and I don’t feel like myself anymore. It’s hard to live but it’s also so difficult to die:( Anyone feel similar?
I haven’t killed myself because my entire family is going through rough times, a death would only set them back that much more. This house is falling apart, literally, and everyone in it suffers daily. How selfish would they think i was if i took my life? Why would that matter? I’d be dead. No one could tell me anything because I’d be erased and that’s what I want. But thats not what im allowed to do, even in death I’m a burden. I never thought I’d be this young and want to die as much as I do. I can’t believe how […]
I don`t know where to start.
I was dating the most wonderful woman for a short 20 months; not long, I know. But the time we spent together is irreplaceable. I already deal with depression and anxiety so when she left me one week before Christmas it just set off a severe downward spiral. I cannot get through the day without drinking copious amounts of alcohol and freezing up when the emotions get too strong. I`ve started self-harming again, I haven`t done this in years. It`s not her fault, this is not just because of a simple breakup but an underlying fact that I have not […]
Has anyone overdosed on (insert poison picked here) and had bad short/long term consequences? Both in terms of health, emotions, relationships… Has looking death in the eye (e.g. waking up in a hospital bed) ever changed your mind and motivated you to live?
I’m going to keep this short and sweet.
So I’m a freshman in college 6 hours away from my home town. About a week ago my sister tried to commit suicide by overdosing on sleeping pills.
I found out about this from her boyfriend, her best friend, and my mom. (I also found out from her best friend that she’s had drug abuse problems recently.) I was able to contact her because she didn’t have her cell phone, but the day after she called me from the hospital. The gist of what I told her was that she should never try anything like that again. First off […]
So yeah, the title says it all, im new around here. I guess this is the part where im suppose to tell you how i came to be here, but that is a long and very boring story.
Mostly it is a by product of my own stupidity and selfishness that forced me to slump into isolation and despair. Im not looking for any sympathy just some like minded people who have had enough of this miserable world. So far my prospects seem a little bleak. No offense but some of you here are just a buzz kill. Anyway i didn’t come here to once again […]
I’m a very musical person. I listen to alot of music. Its what keeps me going. I also play nine instruments, guitar being my main.
So I listen to alot of music and I have song lyrics that I love. I sometimes write them on my arms. People make funbof me for liking music. I don’t care to be honest. I just love what I love and live how I live. I wish I wasn’t living though
So in short. People make fun of me when I write song lyrics on my arm and it sometimes gets to me. Other times, I let it slide
I like to get straight to the point so they’re all pretty short.
Stupid liar slut addict worthless exhausted hopeless lost unmotivated lazy useless weak insecure nothing disgusting dull gone
What’s the point?
I’m sorry.
I’m done with living for everyone else. I’m going to do what will make me happy for once. (This one is the truth but it seems a little harsh right?)
I’m so sick of everything.
I can’t breathe anymore.
I can’t stand to listen to myself think anymore.
Permanent solution to a temporary problem. I’m not temporary.
I’m looking for a short term coping mechanism that allows me to remain functional and that won’t lead to a downward spiral that damages my family – something I can keep hidden, and that won’t ruin my health and make things harder long term.
I don’t fancy cutting – I don’t like scars, or the sight of my own blood.
I’ve never found alcohol particularly effective, and the lives of alcoholics seem to unravel frequently.
Likewise, other recreational drugs seem to lead to a downward spiral. I don’t wan’t to end up on the street, or forcing my family to intervene, or getting a criminal record.
I haven’t really […]
Well, ok I do have SOME reason to be here. I have a story, a few actually, I like to share and write so this site seems perfect for me. But for right now I’m fine, not perfect but fine. I’ll share more of my stories on here later, but for right now I want to get settled in. I’ve been depressed 4 times in my short 16 years of life. 3 of those were real, mature depressions and I’ve been suicidal twice. My last depression nearly killed me. I’ll explain later, but I had also had an anxiety disorder and that opened the door […]
I am only 5’5″ tall, which is really short for an 18 yrs old male like me. Almost everyone, including girls that I would like to date are much taller than me. I am always ashamed when I am around people. People never take me seriously and I have been bullied and insulted because of my height many times. It amazes me to see that how many people are complete jackasses who judge people by their appearances. It is as if it is taught to them that short people aren’t people, they have no feelings, you can insult and bully them to for sick plesure […]