you know when you feel lower than everyone? your grades are not that high that no one lets you take a decision because they think youre too young… that everyone around you is aloud to tell you what you shouldnt do or be or even like, while you arent aloud to discuse with them….I’m here … lying in my bed thinking again about suicide… yes im sick of life like everyone! i’ve started to think about suicide since 6th grade… now im in secondary 4 … in overall i have problemes everywhere… whatever i may do people around me get dissapointed and if i do […]
Today I found out about one more person I know who has cancer. Seems like there has been so many and so many deaths lately and I guess my point in all that is that I would trade them in a heart beat. It makes no sense to me why someone like me who could give a shit if I am on this crap planet another second lives and someone else who wants to live, gets cancer or some other illness. I am 39 years old and question everything I have ever done in my life. Question who I am, question it all. I am […]
Dear everyone,
I am a 12-year-old guy. My life has turned to shit ever since my mom and dad got separated last Christmas. They are now getting a divorce. My dad is dating again and doesn’t really care about how I feel about it. I don’t really know my dad anymore. Since then, my aunt got diagnosed with breast cancer. She’s doing badly and got a mastectomy. We don’t know if she’ll live. My old basketball coach, and my old teacher died. A boy in our grade with Down syndrome had a stroke and died. I have almost no friends, and my few friends don’t really […]
i am 15 years old and living in ireland my story begins when i was only a todler mabye 2 years old growing up with my weed smoking dad he had serious anger problems and because of this he scared me for life im not able to go to school and be with teachers who shout because i only break down in tears and because of this every 1 at school laughs at me meaning that i have no friends 13 years later and still have no friends i have also discovered that i have epolepsy as i am always shaking i cant go to […]
im only 11 and ive already had alot of suiside thoughts i feel useless to the world what the point of this everyone judges me and picks on me. resently my best friends mom died of colen cancer (RIP cythea curro) that brought me down i know if i comite suiside my bff will turn to it 2. im afraid of death, i never try and cut myself. my older brother is the worst, he tells me ill die a vergin he tells me ,”go to hell” “no one cares 4 u” he doesnt help. and just about a month ago my very 1st boyfriend […]
I’m 16, and live in Canada, I have considered suicide about two months ago, never seriously. Therefore,
I realize I may not be able to relate to a lot of things, however I’m not someone who will pretend to be
able to relate. Anyhow, I’m here and willing to help absolutely anyone. If I’m able to help one person
positively, that is my goal. Suicide is something I’ve been around a fair bit in life with multiple family
members, and friends battling their fight. I can fortunately say none have lost there battle. I believe I
am here for a universal reason which many of us share, help […]
i cut. not too much. i wasnt gonna do as much as i did. but its not too much i dont think. it doesnt seem so bad to me really. well ill just post a few pctures of it. so yeah thats it. i find them to be beautiful. please dont judge me.
i just have to. i cant not do it any longer. im going to cut. once again. the last time i cut was in early october. that was a really long time ago. at least it seems to me like it has been forever. every night i think about it. and i am CRAVING to do it. last night before i was going to sleep i was going to do it. but it was too close to the time my brother and mom wake up and i cant risk getting caught. my mom already wants me to do some psychiatric thing. i dont want to […]
Hi, 3 years ago, at the age of 18, I ignorantly made the biggest mistake of my life and tried to kill myself for multiple reasons. I had a passion for a car called 350z, and I did everything I could to get my hands on one, so I worked a minimum wage job and eventually started paying one off. I was happy 🙂 then I met a wonderful girl that I immediately felt connected too, I fell In love with her. We dated for a year and I must say it was the best year of my life. Then i graduated high school, 4 […]
I have a pain I can’t explain
It eats me up inside
It empties me and drains me dry
To a point where there’s nothing left to hide
It makes me high
To a point where I feel low
I gaze and stare
I’m mesmorized
At something that’s not there
But no one cares
Or do they even know?
I cease to show
My pain
The pain inside I can’t define
It takes my heart and grinds it fine
& Spreads it ’round, leaves me down
To a point where there’s every reason to frown
It makes me drown
It a pool of endless pain
It makes me sink
I’m […]
it’s not like I have had a bad life… nothing major has every happened to me but I have always felt kinda depressed and social awkward. I can’t go back to a time where I didn’t feel that way maybe in kindergarten but that would be it. I was never the smartest kid I’m my class an I sometimes needed extra help. I have been bullied and made fun of for years. probably starting in 1st grade till now as a senior… I went through so many stages but nothing really ever helped. I have absolutely tried everything I was anorexic on and off for […]
Well today, the place that said they have a replacement for my broken flow gauge misunderstood me and did not have the right one.
So Tuesday (tomorrow?) I will have to drive 80 miles round trip to a place that I know has what I want. My cup runeth over.
For a brief moment I thought about just running away and driving to a warmer state. I could take the money I had put aside for my cremation and use it to rent a U-Haul type truck one-way. Well that sucked; it would cost me about $2000 and that does not include gas. That is $500 more […]
There has to be a difference between these two statements: “I want to die” and “I wish I weren’t alive. You know how I know? Because I can honestly say the second statement but cannot say the first. Well I can, but I don’t mean it. I know this because about a year ago (Around May) I ‘wanted to die’ so badly, and to my dismay, for the first time, (after roughly 7 years of being suicidal), I realized I couldn’t go through with it. Since that day, I daily wonder why that’s so. See, if I wanted to die, I would have made it […]
i feel so depressed. especially because im at home. i dont have the one person i wish was with me. i saw her today(my best friend that is). my parents wanted me to go to the store with them, but this morning i told my mom i dont wanna go anywhere. and when they left i went right to her house. but i feel sooo bad for what did. i enable her. soo much. and i hate it. she is an addict. even though its hard for me to say that and it breaks my heart to know that. its true though. and i am […]
Okay, so right now, I want to commit suicide badly, but I’m scared like a little baby. I actually took 5 paracetamols to make me feel a bit numb. But whenever I think of that person, I just can’t seem to do it. Oh, I am so tired of living through all this pain. I can’t tell someone cuz I’m afraid they’d think i just want to draw their attention. 🙁 I was actually okay yesterday, but when my grandma called tonight, she said some things about my mom which I didn’t like. I was so mad. I mean, why does she always tell me […]
I think about suicide quite often these days. I am waiting that irresistible wave that finally will sweep me to this inevitable moment of madness. A moment that past and future will disappear. Only the body between other side and now ,to be destroyed. Moment of crystal clear intentions of living in permanence instead of constant agony of trying to catch it. Such a delusion! No wonder most of us choose to live when we turn that corner of no return.
Why would anybody creates such a tempting site so I can actually sit and contemplate my demise? And more importantly who takes her/his time to […]
Before, I tried suicide. Got locked up in a loony bin for a while. It’s never left my mind. I want it—even now. As we speak. I need it. But more than anything right now, I just want to talk to somebody. I don’t know. Here’s something I thought was the last thing I would ever write; guess I was wrong.
Throughout all the noise,
Withstanding all distraction.
The first form of a laugh,
Starting in your throat.
The calm overwhelms,
Takes Control;
Pats your hand, Strokes your hair.
Fatal Reassurance .
What you once feared most ,
Now your closest friend.
A smile on your […]
hello I’m katelin. I’ve been wanting to commit suicide for 2 years now and my mom doesn’t care. I went to the school counselor and she didn’t do anything and we never talk about it. my ex boyfriend of 9 months raped me when we were together. I don’t even know what to do anymore please help
a combination of happiness and suffering
and smiling and crying
it is a journey God picked
for us to travel and see
who made it to heaven or hell.
I dont think thats fair though.
how do we know where we end up?
Does it even really matter??
We all die eventually.
We are eternally asleep when
we die.
So, no, it doesnt really matter.
Our souls will go across the universe.
Nothing will be destroyed when i
Die.
I dont even believe many people will remember me at all.
So why does all this matter so much?
There have been things on my mind that i just cannot
stop thinking of.
And i dont think those things have answers or
explanations.
I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m down to the bottom again. Even though I’m surrounded by tons of people everyday, I feel more alone now than ever. I was raped when I was little. And since then I’ve been having nightmares. But lately the nightmares have gotten so bad that I can’t sleep but when I finally do cry myself to sleep, I just wake up crying everytime. So I started to cut and burn. I still do sometimes. It’s the only thing that helps anymore. Sometimes I just cut to see how much blood will come out or I wonder which spot […]