Part 2 of the 16 series
so far very interesting & mind-opening…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cMcoikRddw
Tag:
Suicide
It seems as if the years have gone by so fast and yet so very slow. I am now 61. Healthy in body, fit, but sick in the mind. Depression has its ups and downs. Sometimes forgoten for a period of time. It has a way of rearing its ugly head when all should be the best I could wish for, almost. Two daughters I have not seen for 14 years suddenly visit me. One I have not seen since 3 months old finds me and is going to visit, I go on a skidoo and have a school of dolphins swim under while one […]
Receiving the phone call, jumping on a plane to LA and taking the elevator up to the 8th floor where my brother was is all a bit of a blur. Walking into to ICU and seeing my brother, broken, swollen, and almost unrecognizable is very clear in my mind. They had to remove the right side of his scull in order to relieve the pressure in his head. His eyes were bulging out of his eye sockets. Blood was slowly oozing from his ears, his eyes and his nose. He was being jerked up and down by the ventilator. […]
Thin lines on her arm
Hidden by her clothes
Cutting deeper and deeper
Because no one knows
Â
She’s just a girl
Not strong enough to stop
A strange addiction
Watching blood drop
Â
She loves the scars
She needs the pain
It frees her sad
It keeps her sane
Â
It’s never enough
To ruin her flesh
She moves up her arm
She inches towards death
Well , I’m new to this i must say honestly i really have no clue what to write in any way, But I’m 15 and i’ve suffered from depression for over 2 years now, and I’m lost, it makes me over think things, i rage a lot over nothing at people for the stupidest things. I’ve attempted a few times, and the cuts are just over welling i cant look at them anymore and every-time i do, it just makes me want to keep doing till i cant take it anymore, I know i may be over reacting but it feels like no-one cares, like […]
Hi, my name is Jordan, my life is a complete disaster. My family are fantastic but my personal issues are awful. i am 18 and recently split up with my girlfriend of over 2 and a half years, the day we split up i found out she was texting another lad and wanted to meet up with him. i was absolutely furious with this. all of the belongings she gave me i walked to hers which is about 4 miles away and i left them on her door. she later phoned me and confirmed she was texting this other person. she always lies to me […]
Hello to anyone reading this. My name is Bran, and this is my story.
Back in December of 2008 I attempted to commit suicide by overdosing. Obviously, I failed. Â A month later, my uncle passed away in a boating accident. I felt like I was being punished for what I was trying to do.
Lots of things happened in between. Quite a few bad ones, actually. I won’t get into it here.
Two months ago, my grandfather passed away. I really can’t live without him. Every day is such a struggle and I have no clue what to do. I am looking at suicide as the answer from […]
I hate it here.
I can’t talk to my mother freely and if I go up to her while she’s just sitting there she always brushes me off or doesn’t respond. My grandmother is a callous and bitter. I’m afraid I’ll end up just like her. I don’t feel like I belong with my family at all. I stay in my room all day because I can’t stand being around them.
My boyfriend acts like he adores me and then he gets mad for no reason and I feel terrible. I always end up apologizing. I don’t want to break up with him because he’s […]
if the ‘biblical’ God does exist, then He must be so lacking in imaginations than humans?
by niki
written by niki
I kept seeing movies and artworks like The Matrix, Avatar, Trons, Paprika (a 2006 anime, you guys have to really google youtube the trailer to know what I mean!), even from video games such as Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, etc
and then suddenly I ponder and saying to myself wow, all these humans’ creations & imaginations are really really fantastic and mind-blowing, that I wish they would be the real heaven, instead of the biblical heaven!
I mean gosh..it seems to me that the idea of biblical heaven seems to be: gold pavements (ew, boring), playing harp in eternity with God (ew, boring boring), and […]
I am not a competitive person, never be.
But even at age of 28 now, my parents and also society seem to teach me that Life is all about “winning, succeeding”, and most especially to “strive for the BEST”, which usually means to try to reach to the TOP, be the number ONE, be the BEST, etc etc.
But I guess I always admired and taken into heart deeply what an ex-pastor said:
“if everybody wants to become number one, then who will become number two, number three, etc??”
I think this is truly the Reality, that he speaks of. and that’s why I admired him for […]
Last night I’ve seen some posts that talks/mention about existential nihilism, and I think I used to have great discussion with my little brother about this..quite interesting.
However, like I’ve said before in some posts here, since “Hope” is always seem to be inherent in each human being (seems to be our given Nature), then it’s only logical for me to try to find the ‘loophole’ with that branch of philosophy (by now I’m sure we all know that all kinds of philosophies & even science can always be found the ‘loophole’ and sometimes for a Good purpose to improve for a better ones, this is […]
I’m even starting to feel like, I don’t belong even on this site.
Like people are judging me, thinking I’m pathetic or not worth the time.
Even on a site where, suicide is the topic, and people are sharing their troubles, I feel like I’m not worthy of doing the same.
Guess it doesn’t matter if I eventually get the ending to my pain that I really want.
This is the first post i’ve made to the internet since all this has happened, but here goes:
My girlfriend of 14 months left me in december and it was pretty sudden. We’d been having a few problems, nothing major, but we’d worked everything out. She was lying to me alot, going out to parties and telling me I couldn’t go with her and the reason was so she could see her friends as when i was there she felt stuck with me. She was talking/flirting with this boy alot online, I’d seen it and asked her but she insisted they were just friends. She promised […]
Why does it seem like just me…? i feel like i’m backed so far into this corner that i have nothing left but this… Everyone says it’ll get easier. They’ve been telling me that since the 6th grade.. It’s not any better now in high school.. They laugh and i think it’s at me. They say i’m pretty, but then talk about me as soon as i turn around. Bullied? no. not bullied. alone? yes.. very much so… The ‘rents? oh, they’re much worse…beaten+verbal abuse+bullied=? suicide? i can’t i can’t…he pulls me back from this deep deep depression and into reality… he makes the world […]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-ufE76lO7Y
The days blur,
blessed with dreams,
dreams of you
with dreams of me.
Those dreams aren’t real.
Those dreams are false.
They always come
but at what cost?
The cost of blood,
the cost of pain.
The haze is fading,
and so i pay.
I paid the cost
and now I’m lost.
Forever wandering,
forever washed
ashore that empty
lonesome beach,
that some may call
eternal sleep.
We are all here sitting & staring at the blue scree, while somewhere out there in this world…
by niki
written by niki
http://www.darkroastedblend.com/2008/09/most-alien-looking-place-on-earth.html
Maybe we all should just drop everything, and go there,
to really truly experience LIFE again..
to feel and realize and be inspired,
knowing that perhaps, this earthly-life is worth to be lived with our every breath
only if we flee ourselves from our prison-wall, whatever that is..
today, it’s gonna be such a good day to say goodbye
In previous topic before this, I’ve talked & admitted about how I’m still jobless now,.and still living with my parents. I feel so ashamed, and especially for my parents, who are admittedly much more ‘practical’ than me & my ‘head-in-the-clouds’ imaginative personality,..which can act like a damn “curse” quite often. and all the ADHD, bipolar, easily bored/depressed/lose focus,..stuff like that!
So now, here I am,..almost 29 yrs old,..and still a fucking ‘loser’ as far as I can see..
and although as much as I often said that I don’t CARE about what society (even my family & parents & relatives!) keep saying, bombarding, pressuring, and […]
1. Are you now studying (school/uni?), or working? at which field/career? does it suck, or you enjoy?
2. And for those of you who are both not studying and working, how do you ‘finance’ your everyday living?
do you still stay (& provided) with ur parents? or…?
As for me, I shamefully admit,..I belong to the 2nd category, and yes, I still stay with my parents,..despite my age of almost 29 yrs old…. this is really pathetic/sad, especially in the eyes of my ‘practical’ parents AND society!
It doesn’t even matter a shit whether if people often are ‘surprised’ by my intelligences, deep […]