I was never a religious person nor am I now but I often think that I am stuck in hell. “Hell on earth” , hell of depression , loss , memories , feeling like I am speaking in a foreign language because people may hear me but they DON’T understand me so I resort to silence then there is the heartbreak , the feeling like your heart is literally being broken into two and the thoughts come and they are anything but organised.. I am left angry and exhausted. I think , this is what he must of felt like and I had no idea. […]
My whole life has seemed a blur, like nothing is real and everything is just underlined with pain. I actually come from a successful and wealthy background, I have never been left wanting for more. However, for some reason the only thoughts  I seem to house are ones of suicide. It happens in the shower, at work, in bed, at family gatherings….. absolutely everywhere. Its like being tortured and destroyed from the inside out. About a year ago I met someone who was the first person I ever opened up to. I told him how I felt over time, and he promised to help and […]
Hey everybody, I’ve been here off and on for a month or two. First off, I’ve met a lot of really good people on here. I think most of us SP users are really soft hearted and it’s easy to click with other people here. I don’t know why I’m writing this because I’ve made up my mind and I’m not looking for support or crying out for help. Hopefully someone out there that also feels like shit will read it and maybe get something out of it.
I’ve lost 3 people this year and my cat that I had for 7 years (I count that […]
I recently read a post from a person feeling deep depression for a major part of his or her life and feeling that God is removed from involvement in her life. Â I have done a great amount of soul searching in understanding this as well. Â I have discovered through the death of my brother from his suicide a firmer understanding of God and his complete involvement into our lives. Â I recently discovered in my need to understand that I was not listening. Â I have been reading the bible where Jesus is witnessing to his followers disciples that they need not fear the ruler of this […]
be straight up I suppose…. My names Serena , I’m in 7th grade at Bemidji Middle School , I have a smile on my face most of the time(= , but everybody knows im ‘depressed’ , because …. I cut myself , a lot… my legs , my arms , my wrists , my stomach…. It make’s me feel better. I don’t know what else to do! , I ALWAYS get called a ; HOE , WHORE , **** , ***** , FAT , UGLY , WORTHLESS , ATTENTION WHORE , DUMB , BOYFRIEND STEALER , etc.. It sucks , a lot , I don’t […]
My proposed Note or “willâ€
(If you don’t give a fuck [as I suspect you don’t] and just want to get to the will skip the paragraphs and go to the bolded text.)
I killed myself because I can’t make heads or tails of life. My luck is almost always bad, and I am tired of hardship. Like many who have been in this place I have contemplated, and while the one’s full of vigor and self-righteousness say to live is the hardest, that isn’t true. It’s taken me a lot of research and commitment to die. Staying alive was not because I chose to do the […]
ok, i have something on my mind. And I know that other people have it much worse, but I’m just gonna say my story.
My life is not bad. I don’t know where my depression started. But it did. And it won’t go away. I just feel like the biggest misfit. I cut and starve myself. I have to admit, its mainly for attention. It’s not working though. I don’t know whats wrong with me. I can barely think anymore, my thoughts are so mixed up. Everything hurts. I hurt everyone I care about. People think I’m a freak. They have a right to, because I […]
I don’t want to be dead. I’m suicidal, and I recognise this fact. I think about killing myself the way other people think about what they’re going to have for breakfast. I don’t want to die, I just can’t face the fear and the despair that always return to my mind. It gets to the point where I can’t see any other alternative.
I’ve tried to kill myself a lot of times, 16 to be exact, and I’ve always failed. My last two attempts were definitely the most serious, and both almost ended my life. The first I ended up with multiple organ failure; the last I jumped […]
I am a 29 year old male. I have struggled with depression for as long as I can remember. I have attempted suicide several times, I chose to believe that perhaps there was a reason why I survived. As if there a purpose to my existence. However at this point I have abandoned that frail belief and have chosen to give up completely. I can not remember most of my past, the memories are there but they have become so faded and blurry I can no longer distinguish the realities of my past with the vibrant thoughts of my once over active imagination.
The first attempt […]
Where do i even start this sob story? I’m only 19 and from the age of 8 ive been depressed and not wanting to live, i tried to commit suicide when i was 15, and now at 19 i feel that low again that im just waiting for the final straw to snap and to do it again although i dont want to die but i dont want to live either, its a confusing stage. It all began when i was 8 and my mum was in a relationship with an abusive asshole who made me feel like shit and played mind games and i […]
I feel…. weird. Almost as if all feeling has been sucked away now. I fake my laughs. My tears just don’t come anymore. When I get hurt, I immediately want to hurt that person back. They put holes in my plan, so I’m going to make them crash and burn. I’m driven by what seems to be revenge, but on what? I can’t figure it out. I only see one way out. Not suicide. Not hurting myself. Trying to get revenge on everything that hurts me. I’ll hurt them back. Apex predators kill without remorse. Humans are Apex predators. I am an Apex predator. Cross […]
I have been talking to a few close friends about this but not yet written it down, this site is a great idea, ive just joined and im looking forward to reading more-its somewhat refreshing to not only know others out there are feeling like ending their life but that interaction is also possible- which is important.
Im a mature student in my finial year of uni, i dont really drink or do drugs anymore, its taken me 8 years to get to this point as my teeneage years and general social circles are all based on booze.drinking was making me miserable, so i stopped or […]
Today I was seconds away from ending my life. What changed my mind I still do not know.
After 10 years of SEVERE deppresion I am tired, I am tired of it all. I am exhausted.
I tried fighting back for year after year. Medications and therapy(many different therapists) for 10 years and I have not moved a single step forward. Not one step..
2 years ago I gave up. After 8 years of trying I was tired of fighting and in the end i realised I am never going to feel joy again. Â I gave up hope.
I have always had suicidal thoughts for as long as I […]
And finally number four, self harm.
I hate those words, self harm. It’s strange that to some people it simply means a problem that someone has, to others it’s a consuming addiction. I don’t even know how to talk about it, I’ve never really had to. Not out loud. People are too afraid to ask me about it face to face, or if they do they never come straight out with it, like if your parents try to have a sex talk with you, without actually mentioning the word sex. Thats what all of my friends are like. But the stupid thing is people expect me […]
An elegant suicide is the ultimate work of art.
Bad art is more tragically beautiful than good art because it documents human failure.
There’s too much beauty to quit. There’s too much goddamn beauty.
Your troubles will cease and fortune will smile upon you.
Life is not for me I see my self in the next world
happy as can be suicide is our pleasure our ticket out
of this world if this were Greece or Rome the world would not hate us
my suicidal brethren death will be a wonderful gain it is the
best sleep!
Dont know how to start. Iam so tired of this life it have nothing for me i’m depressed and i have taken some treathment for it it helped a little when i was in hospital for 2 months. now there has just becom more things that makes me want to do suicide. I have once tried to do it with pills and i was almost death when my wife found me. Then i have been for spychiastrist for talking but it just wont help. The things what eat me inside is just too much to take care like when i married my wife all my […]
I Cut. For All The Shame.
I Cut. And You’re The One To Blame.
I Cut. Releasing Pain And For Comfort.
I Cut. Being Molested By A Pervert.
I Cut. Thinking I’m Worthless.
I Cut. Knowing I Have No Purpose.
I Cut. To See The Blood Fulfill And Rise.
I Cut. For All Those Lies..
I Cut Because It Feels Good To Control My Own Pain For Once.
I Cut….And Next Comes Suicide.
I cant take it anymore. I miss the old me..you know that happy one. That tiny with the actual happy smiles. The real smiles. Im so tired and i cant even find something i like anymore. i could say i want to get better. I’ve tried, many times. But the only time i feel happy is when im with one of my friends…well used to be friend. He helped me through everything. Yet, i pushed him away. He never gave up. ever. he probably still has hope for some reason im scared to be with him. My girlfriends wo i barely tell anything to has […]
Hi I want to die life gives me no pleasure I wish to depart for the next world this world is shit but how to do it without
hurting my mom I been thinking of many methods but I have no idea how to make it look like a an accident what should
I do .I don’t want to hurt my mom but I just really what to depart the earth I lust after death to die is gain!!!!!!!!!!!!