i thought. . .
i hoped. . .
i wished. . .
you broke. . .
you crushed. . .
you hurt. . .
i didn’t. . .
i wanted. . .
i really. . .
you didn’t. . .
you hated. . .
you thought. . .
Tag:
thought
my best friend is moving away…I don’t know what I’m going to do without her so close to me. It’s a scary thought not knowing what is going to happen 🙁
Hey guys! So for a YouTube on my channel, I thought I’d answer some questions. So comment some, please!
A daily reminder:
I love you. You are a strong person and remember that sometimes being strong isn’t always good, because if your constantly strong you’ll eventually feel weak.
I promise you it’ll all be okay.
Maybe not today. Or tomorrow. Or next month. You just gotta be patient, okay?
Just do what you like! Go on an adventure. Climb a tree. Make a new friend. Go to the park and be a little kid again. Make something. Call a random number and ask how they’re doing today. Write a […]
Maybe it doesn’t…
Maybe I don’t…
I wish though…
I hoped…
I thought…
So there’s this girl, she always felt lost and alone in this big world. It seemed like nothing would ever go right. She doesn’t know who her dad is and her mom only cared about the next guy in line to be with. She seen her mom go thru hell and back. She helped her mom thru all her drug addictions but it seemed like no matter what she did she could never get her mother’s love. When she was young her mom dropped her off at her ex husbands house cause she couldn’t take care of her and she thought it was the best […]
Well this is my story.
I’ve always had depression since I can remember. I never thought I had a chance at a regular life… I’ve had a pretty rough childhood and teenage life. It all started when I was 5. Something terrible happened to me and it changed me in so many ways. I’ve never been the same ever since.. I’ve been rapped multiple times and I’ve was beat growing up by my step father and when I was 14 I found out I was pregnant and my sons father always hit on me, choked me, and controlled me in every way possible. We stayed together […]
I’m so tired, i cant take it anymore, i thought i was getting better even the thoughts had left my head, then they just came crashing back and now it’s just like it was before. I cant tell my family, they thought i was getting better how can i tell them it was just an act. that i still feel the crushing loneliness, the hatred inside. How do i survive? I don’t have anyone, nobody seems to care  and the ones i thought did care, just turn their backs on me. I just want someone to look at me and tell im not alone. But […]
I have no one I can talk to who understands how I feel. Even family members can’t be trusted that much any more. I feel like I’m slowly going mad.
I stare into space for ages unable to move, just wanting to hide, but no where to run to.
I’ve felt like this for years and years. I have ‘I’m weak please kick me’ mentally stuck on my forehead or back somewhere and there are some kind people who won’t take advantage. But I start to question myself again – am I taking advantage of them in some way too? Am I subconsciously testing people to work […]
My best friend is having a birthday party in a couple weeks but it’s at a water park. My thighs have pink raised scars and there is no hiding those in a bikini. I’m going to try different ways to cover them up and if that doesn’t work I guess will be “sick” that weekend. I would feel really shitty about doing that though. I never thought I would live long enough to have this problem. It’s not like I want to put a damper on everyone’s day by explaining my scars. I hate getting attention. Surprise everyone I’ve found a religion that requires me […]
Pencil and paper, is that all it takes?
wrong.It takes perfect words
sweet time, a million tears
strength? to write
to pour out your feelings?
to say goodbye?
letting go seems easy
til its written out
onto a clean sheet of paper
the hours you spent writing
searching for the right words
answering questions, that may be inquired
deciding when you should do it
is there ever a perfect time to go?
you’ve written several notes before
but this time it overwhelms you
your train of thought? gone?
your tears? never ending?
death? undecided?
that note will never be read.
at least not for a while.
is it not perfect yet?
or does fear take over?
it’s folded, neatly
slid away with the rest
waiting.
waiting.
for another day
I’d rather not get into the “drama” about why I was wanting to die but i will say what put it to a stop, at least for the time being. I didn’t want to end my life by my own hands, first of all. I just wanted death, not suicide, but death by any means I could think of. But the more and more I tried to think of ways i could die without it truly having it been seen as suicide, my mind just started wandering to other things. No super important “life changing discoveries”, no mind shattering “realizations”, none of those last minute […]
I’m not going to lie and say I haven’t thought about taking my life and how I would do it. I used to be the happiest kid ever. I was loved.. I started getting called fat and ugly around 4th grade and I still get it from my siblings.. Since then I have moved 2 times to start “new”.. I first lived In a place with nothing but drugs and violence, yet somehow I found some people who weren’t screwed in the head.. I friended them and we were inseparable.. Then my friend introduced me to this boy. He was trouble and couldn’t seem to […]
The thought of suicide has crossed my mind for years and have often thought how my families life would be affected by my own death? How would they cope, survive ? I know that life is a blink or heart beat away and we should not take life for granted however when your up against a brick wall why live!!! In the past month I have watched more gore movies , binged death, suicide , cemetery, coffins, life after death and so on. Yes I know I’m depressed and on medication but when you have 4 ways going at you at all angles from […]
So I reply on bully posts often because I hate hate hate bullies. I dealt with them growing up and thought that in the mature world of adults that we would have moved on from this, but now I have a new bully. I didn’t realize until tonight. The first time we met I really believed that she was a ***** having a bad day. Now after she has apparently lied on me twice to my manager (my manager caught that), I no that she’s just simply got a problem with me. Of course I couldn’t care less if she likes me. However, if she […]
i dont think i should even feel so bad. but im deppresed. i feel like im falling falling or rolling downhill painfully and it sucks. i can barely avoid the thoughts of suicide, when im eating, with friends, trying to sleep or any other moment at all. i just cant keep them out. im so afraid ill start to like them and eventually ACTUALLY love the thought of death. whats barely holding me in place is a caring girlfriend, the knowledge that i CAN get better and the mere thought that im human and i can BE.
today was shit, my seventh period geometry teacher is out to fucking get me. she makes me get in front of a class of 30 dumb ass ignorant teens everyday and make me do the problems and explain them as if im the teacher. i dont mind it too much but of course the kids are relentless and will make any joke they can and the fucking teacher, guess what she does? nothing! she lets them make fun of me on a every day basis. embarrassing is a understatement. but today my voice was shakey (idk the cause but i hadnt gotten any sleep last […]
Hi there everyone! my name is Katie and i recently just stumbled upon this place and i decide to make an account and tell you guys my story and maybe help someone who is in need of something like this ;P I’ve never done this before so give me some slack ^.^ Alright well the first part of my story starts when i was in 3rd grade. I was a bit chubby back then (still a bit now) and was pretty much the only chubby kid in my school my school was very small and was a traditional baptist church/school everyone new everyone. And you […]
I just read a few stories here. They are sobering to say the least. And if you’re reading this, and you posted something recently I want to say sorry for thinking I had depression, or wanting to kill myself, because it’s nothing compared to what you guys went through or are still going through.
I feel sickened to think that anyone would find out my actual identity. That’s why I’m thankful this is anonymous.
I was bullied for a while up to lately but everything  is going okay.I’m fine in school, really stressed and probably could do a bit more study but okay. I have an idea […]
has anyone thought to do like in that movie? i rlly thinking to that but need a serious plan
Nobody understands, I don’t understand it myself.
I don’t open up to anybody and don’t feel the need too, I think I can talk about my problems and work out my problems in my head and for a while, its worked. It worked up until this point, the point I realize I have absolutely nothing. Its taken me all these years, all those times when I thought I was better, All those pills prescribed for something that I didn’t quite understand myself, I just thought I was normal, being in touch with my feelings was normal, everything was normal.
To make matters worse, I started using drugs, […]