Where ever I may go, there will always be Demons swarming around me. Sucking dry every chance I may get at happiness. I have fallen out of grace with the light long ago, and now the dark covers me with its unholy glow of blackness. Perhaps it’s my fault for letting the darkness blacken my soul. Angels scorn me, demons mock me, gods disown me, spirits wait for me. A dissolute creation of the most shallow kind. Doomed to walk in lonliness until the end of time. Another light faded. Another hope darkened. Another dream ripped from me by the demons that swarm me. They […]
Tag:
us
I’m starting to have memory issues.
Sometimes, I forget I did simple things like brush my teeth or take a shower. After exams, I sometimes don’t remember anything about what the exam was about, and…
I’m scared. I’m afraid I’ll disappear. Fade out. Because if I forget everything about myself, am I still myself? Or am I just some empty shell, waiting to drop dead? A shadow? Because you know what happens to a shadow when it’s put in bright light, right? It disappears.
I don’t personally believe in God. Simply because if He was really all-loving and all-powerful, would He really leave us with things like misery, […]
6-6-15 12:21 am I changed! I changed everything. I walked out on 20 years. I walked away from what wasn’t healthy for me. I started over. It’s not easy. I have $7 fucking dollars in my account until payday. This is HARD. I am working it out. I am learning who I am. I am trying to be myself for the first time in 20 years. I want to grow. I am open to new things. New flavors. New cities. I will not close off any experience for fear or sameness any more. I will try.
But I want us. It’s really all I’ve ever […]
For the past week and a half, I have been walking through a tunnel of darkness, it feels. I couldn’t see and thought I wasn’t going to be able to find a way out. It was disorienting. But I kept trudging, and along the way, fears from childhood pulled at me from the darkness. They nagged at me. “Stay with us,” they pleaded. “Don’t leave us behind,” they cried. So I stayed for a while. They soothed me with their familiarity. So I stayed for a few more days. Then a voice within the darkness asked me, “Don’t you remember?” But my fears gripped me […]
Anyone here from Toronto? Just wondering. Usually most of the people from these sites are from the US and sometimes I feel left out lol.
At school i only have three friends which we all have different sexuality. I’m a bisexual, one of them is Pan-sexual (which if any you don’t know means doesn’t care what they are boy,girl, trans) another Asexual (no sexual attraction to anyone) and the Heterosexual (straight) and this stupid fuck up group of people keep on bullying us about it. I don’t even know how they found out! It pisses everyone off but we can’t do anything because we’re quiet shy about it so we don’t say it much. And that just makes it worst how so how they know! Also we mixed classes recently […]
It’s always the people that want to live that end up getting terminal cancer or hit by a bus or stranded in a house fire. Those of us that want to die, if we never commit suicide, we will be the ones living miserably into our late 90s. We’ll be the ones to outlive our friends, our spouses, even our children. It doesn’t make sense. We should get to have our misery cut short if we don’t want to live anymore. Cancer on demand… nobody would blame us for our deaths. Those that are happy and capable of dealing with this stupid world should live […]
I’m tired of always initiating conversations, and never willingly talked to.
I’m tired of being the one to invite them, and they don’t even consider inviting me.
I’m tired of sacrificing my free time planning for us to hang out, and then be ignored when we’re together.
I’m tired of always listening to their troubles and soothing them, and be ignored when I’m sad myself.
I’m tired of the fact that everything I do is hypocritical, and that they are always right.
I’m tired of being told I matter, even though they do all these things to me.
I’m tired of having friends that make me feel like shit and let […]
Hello everyone. I have been depressed for some time now. I’ve been to the hospital for it and stayed for about a week. I am married and my wife knows of my depression. while in the hospital they said that I have a general mood disorder and bi polar tendencies. With the mood disorder my mood can change in an instant. It can be triggered just by someone getting snippy with me or giving me attitude and I can help it.
The marriage overall has been good. But as of late there is a lot of stress and both of us are depressed. About a week […]
Everyone just throw to the fire things that make you feel bad. I’ll start:
helplessness
loneliness
greediness
ignorance
bad music
…
I am the girl waiting patiently for her turn at the throne. I’m the girl that’s tired of feeling alone. I’m the girl who sits on the corner at parties, watching everyone as they go by. I feel like I’m already gone. Helping others as they go along. But then there’s another part of me. This girl is caged, waiting to be set free. She is tormented and controlled. Her body is shaky and cold. She screams but no one can hear. She is left in a room of despair. She takes to the needle like a baby with a bottle, the past ten years […]
I want to ask but the words won’t come out.
You make me choose between you two.
What do you expect to a child who don’t want to lose both?
I want to help but I can’t. If I did, he’ll hate us and the same thing would happen. And it’ll be worse.
So, I can’t choose. All I can do is hear you out while you vent out all your pain.
But I still want to ask why is this happening to us yet the words won’t come out. And this aggression would be another wound on my body.
So I’m gonna share one of the reasons that tempted me to end my life (Read my last post). So, I’m not really close to my father. He always works overseas. And I always thought he was a good guy, working his hardest for us, for his family. Then when I was around 10 years old, I heard my mom and dad fighting, me and my sisters were downstairs, trying to eat our lunch peacefully when suddenly our mom screamed. She screamed at our dad, the kind of scream that breaks your voice, the kind of scream that was full of emotions. About 5 minutes […]
We all have that one person or problem we try to forget about but we can’t. It weighs on us like a ton of bricks. We do things to try and make ourselves forget but we will never forget. No matter how hard we try to not let it get it to you, it will always stick with you. Am I right?
Like right now there’s this one person that will not get out of my mind. All the memories we had together and how I messed up. I try to forget all the time. I cant explain how much it hurts..
Why be so rash and impulsive? Because as hard as emotion can be it can also be what drives us to soaring heights and selfless, pure love. What’s the point in acting until the uncertainty and fears are unveiled and reconciled: the choice presents itself with a little time. Patience leads to places and feelings never fathomed possible. Cast off recklessness with a stronger force of commitment and certainty.
I cheated on my fiancé with a married man. The married man is the man who sold us our house and puts me to work as an artist.
My fiancé dumped me after finding out. Married man not fully committing and everything hurts. I could lose everything and I hate myself. Why the fuck do I ruin everything?!
I have slept with so many men I am too ashamed to count. Put my children through hell. I have no job. And no man wants me any more. I’m dangerous and exciting but not worth it.
Please something kill me because I need to be put out of my […]
ssI’ve gotten to the point to where my head hurts when ever I get even the slightest depressed It hurts so much I can’t stand it. My biggest wish is to be happy. I want a family and kids My girlfriend made me promise I wouldn’t hurt myself. She use to selfharm but she stopped when we started living together and she realized that I cut alot and she wanted us to get better together but its hard for me I don’t want to let her down but when she gets upset I get depressed.. She’s all I have like my mind is so damage […]
It’s been 92 days since we stopped talking, all the nights i spent on the thoughts of her were so lonely and rough to live. What should I do when i seem stop on the same spot since we broke up, since we broke up my life stopped the joy of life left me as she did. 15th of February on valentines day was the end of us. I miss our conversations about nothing. I was hers and she was mine and none of us were lesbian. We never labeled ourselves. Man this is awful i miss her so much and since we broke up […]
Man i hate life, but if the shoe fits, wear it.
i hate myself for being born on this evil planet.
if i could kill and get away with it ill make these fuckin Christians pay in blood because they know inside they fuckin did it.
I bathe in pain because my life is in a fucking mess.
Don’t say you understand because you dont know how i stress.
i think about suicide all the time because i wanna die so bad and it dont matter that im fuckin pressed.
Take a moment to think about what i see.
All i see are ghosts of […]
We all have that one person don’t we. They keep us going, most of them don’t even realise it but shit they help us. Mine is fantastic. They make me feel important and valuable, possibly maybe after time, they could make me happy (happy is a big word for me so I don’t tend to use it when reflecting on myself). This person never has to try to lift me up because knowing their existence is in my presence gives me life. The way they talk with such intellect, their mind, fuck their mind is so beautiful. Logically, I love this human.
But unfortunately it’s contradicts it’s self.
I’m on […]