I have listened to the advice given on my last post, which was quite a while ago. I have been hoping that getting another dog would make me more happy. I believe that she has. She loves me and I love her. The sad part is that she is my only true friend in this world. At the same time I have been trying to chat to women my own age. They do not seem to be interested in me. The only women who are would be very young women. They do not need to be with me because they have their whole life ahead […]
Tag:
wants
I don’t want to kill myself..I want to live my life and be happy. I’m trying so hard to hold it together but I’m fucking it all up. I have so much to live for it shouldn’t be this fucking hard to stand confident.
I finally met this beautiful girl that likes me and wants to spend time and she’s already catching on to my depression. I’ve shown enough good parts of myself to make her see I’m a great guy but I literally can’t control the way I feel when I’m all alone. I’m fucking this all up. No, No this can’t be me..it […]
Sigh… I never thought I’d be back on this site… after I finally built up the courage to actually speak to my mother and tell her about my suicide thoughts and depression.. but my mother being the religious woman she is (ironic) prayed and since I cut myself off from religion.. I just sat in since while she did and took the advice I got from amazing people on this site..
I went out, I did new things, made new friends… it got better after a while.. until a few days ahgo.
A brief description of me:
I’m a social person, I use humor as a […]
Dear mom,
I know this will hurt you for as long as you live. I don’t know what to say to ease the pain I’m going to cause, but I know that ‘sorry’ changes little. Though I will tell you why I did this, I know you’ll still be overwhelmed, confused, and hurt. Everything that was going through my head before I did this can be found in the Notes and Momento apps on my iPod if you’re interested. Everyone will probably think that this was an irrational decision done on impulse, but it wasn’t. There was a lot of thought put behind it, and there […]
Just like I presumed life seriously did mess me right up again. Life just seems to be a gamble nowadays. Once again I got caught with my boyfriend….really is it that bad to have a boyfriend I mean I am 18 just leave me be. Ok I know it goes against my religious beliefs and all but I just don’t know what to do any more. On one side my parents are telling me to get married now, but we have nothing to live off and are still students ourselves…and on the other side I have his side who don’t mind me getting married to […]
Hi. I’ve never done anything like this before. I never really like talking to people about my suicidal tendencies, mostly because the people I need to share this with and want help from, are the people that don’t want to hear anything about this.
I don’t see a max on the amount of characters permitted, so I guess I’m going to tell you my whole story..
I was born on the 15th of April, 1994, in Milan, Italy–I am 100% Italian, with both parents being Italian. Apparently, according to my mother, I wasn’t planned.. you see, the thing with my mother is that she likes to blame […]
My original intention was to comment on someones post – suicide is not selfish. It is only viewed as selfish by those who are angry because you are nolonger there to be used & abused. That is how it will be for me.
In 1 week I will be homeless. I really feel like I should give up right now. Everything has fallen apart, but replacements are falling into place. My ‘best friend’ whom I live with has replaced me with one of her friends & her 2 little kids. I have lost my sister to the clutches of my mother, so I am no longer […]
After spending 4 weeks on a Psychiatric unit/ward I don’t feel much better then I did before I went in, feel a wee bit better but not much.
I really don’t know what I’m going to do with myself I still want to die but at the same time I want to get better, As anyone fellt these emotions at the same time before? I feel that it’s too late for me I car’t see my life with out depression and psychosis.
I see all the people that are fighting for their lives with cancer or other terminal illnesses, And who wants to live. Then they […]
Where should I start :/ I haven’t always been depressed and want kill myself. It all started once my family started have problems and lots of stress one parents shoulders. This stress was transferred to me and I took it in for awhile not knowing what would the outcome be. Then I found out my uncle has cancer and is very sick. This caused me to go into a depression stage while not knowing it yet. My parents yelled At me making me think this is ally fault so this led to smoking Weed, then I started having relationship problems with my girlfriend!! This where […]
I feel that my life was mostly pointless because I could not live to the fullest at all because everything costs money, and people have to like you so your life is easier. So most of my childhood it was extremely lonely I had no friends and I got bullied everyday I think that pretty much tells me I had no place in this world cause I didn’t matter to anymore infact people wanted me gone. they didn’t care when I got hurt on the playground, when I got punched, when I threw up in class, I was so alone. When I was in the […]
people in school thinks im the happiest girl in the world, but honestly, i am not. at home, i am the reckless one. i have 4 siblings. i’m the middle child. all of them feels so loved and appreciated while im here picking up all the hand me downs and the things left for me. i am always the “target” of my mom. when my big brother fails a quiz, she doesn’t get mad at him, but instead she supports him and allow him to party anytime he wants and gives him anything he wants. same goes to my sister and brothers. me? she scolds […]
I’ve had a lot of medical and mental history. My CFS/fibromyalgia is bad at this moment. I’ve tried to take my life in the past, but didn’t know you were supposed to go down the road and not cross the tracks. Plus I have a genetic blood disorder that causes my to clot quickly. I didn’t know that at the time. I saw my mother try to kill herself several times as a child. I don’t want to leave that legacy to my hubby and children or whoever may find me. But, I’m tired of being a burden. I’ve learned my Daughter in Law says […]
So my ex boyfriend and me.have been talking. He always says he likes me and really wants to be with my but he pisses me off and I deny him. So yesterday I told him about my depression and he comforted me and even offered to bring a screwdriver to me because I couldnt get the screw out of my.pencil sharpner for the blade. He encouraged my cutting and now he got mad at me for asking him if he liked me so much why did he talk to other girls. He got pissed and now im.scared hell tell everyone at school about my depression […]
For sometime I believed suicide was wrong and that what they say is true its only for a spell. But I doubt that now, I have watched several videos were people committed suicide and I felt their pain and cried. I guess for so long I thought I was alone and I said nothing but I see we all cry and no one says anything. I think just as we make our path we can decided to leave. No one wants to be alone and hurt, everyone wants to be hugged and loved, but I guess God or whom ever is up their only gave […]
My mother is never really careful with how she says things. She’s always frank without boundaries and she never understands what’s wrong with that. She has so many hurtful words she already told me that I cannot even remember the worst of them. She has called me names, judged my whole life and according to her, I will never be anything in life.
When she’s mad, she’s mad. She doesn’t care whatever she does or say that will affect anyone. Maybe this is the reason why I’m so sensitive, because those things I never thought I would hear from anyone would come from her. She would […]
This is it, my limits have been overrun by such bad feelings and thoughts.
I have never felt this bad in my whole entire life, this is consuming me and i don’t know what to do with myself anymore. Everyone i have turned to for help, has just ignored the fact i’m very suicidal or minimalised how i feel. They don’t take me serious, they underestimate how bad i feel and how suicidal i am and how badly i want to die. Even my therapist ignored the fact i’m suicidal, even though i told her everything.
Nobody wants to help me. I see that now.
My […]
If there’s anybody in London (or anywhere in the UK) who wants to chat about anything, leave a comment.
I’ve never been on this site before, but I don’t have anyone to talk to.
Currently I’m 34 weeks pregnant and I have a 5 year old and a 2 year old. My husband and I are having issues, He’s become harsh and uncaring about issues I’ve been having during this pregnancy. Due to this I feel as though I’m being pushed to break a promise I made 5 years ago. The day I found out I was pregnant with my first I promised I would never cut again.
Lately that’s all I can think about. I fantasize of the feel of a blade against my […]
i dont knkw what it is, from the age of 12 my whole life changed ive never liked myself. i have just split up with my boyfriend today. we was together for 2 years, wenr through alot together he made me feel wanted and loved, made me feel like there was actually good things to me. i thought everything was fine, we talked about having a baby, getting married how much we loved each other. we went on a mini break to devon to just be together without any one else, without work just to spend time together. i was happy.. he told me today […]
Wow I haven’t been on here for awhile probably because it wasn’t helping much but it felt good to let my thoughts out haha…..anyswirls I’m still suicidal….thinking of committing suicide today actually. Not sure if I am going to though, I can see myself doing it but I’m not really sure if I can you know? I mean it’s not like everyone wants to die , it’s just I get to the point of where it feels like I do. Hmm I don’t make sense. But anyswirls it’s been …a tough week I guess. The guy I like ( oh god no not a […]