I feel that my life was mostly pointless because I could not live to the fullest at all because everything costs money, and people have to like you so your life is easier. So most of my childhood it was extremely lonely I had no friends and I got bullied everyday I think that pretty much tells me I had no place in this world cause I didn’t matter to anymore infact people wanted me gone. they didn’t care when I got hurt on the playground, when I got punched, when I threw up in class, I was so alone. When I was in the 3rd grade I remember playing football by my self praying that someday someone would like me and that I would matter to somebody. that never happened I just gave up trying to make friends because I was viewed as a fool. No one ever wants to be seen with a loner because they are not cool and somethings wrong with them for people not to like them. all I wanted was for people to stop being mean they never gave up they were never nice they never were humane. I have no purpose being alive if nothing would change when I die. I never smile at people ever, I have a missing tooth because some stupid kid hitme in the face with a ball and knocked it out I have to live with this for the rest of my life and im too poor to afford braces and a new tooth. I remember when these girls they looked at my pants and said I needed more fashionable pants they kept trying to get away from me and make me feel inferior they all had there rich jeans and I just had my brothershand me down pants that I did not want to wear. why didn’t my mom just abort me? I would never wanna have kids because they have to put up with this shit. but oh well ill die soon hopefully something will kill me I would hate to live to be old age like no thank you I had enough and I got nothing out of this life.
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Hang in there buddy it might seem like people don’t like you but there’s always a place or a group for Someone just hang in there don’t try to stop trying to make friends because you’ll make some someday
It’s fucked being bullied, I know how you feel. The sense of powerlessness when you know you deserve better than that. The sense of loneliness…of being inadequate, worthless, valueless. But it’s the bullies that are worthless, yet I say that knowing how light weight it sounds. You can’t take the shit you feel away with what seems like pithy statements. What would be good for you is if good people came into your life and treated you like you actually mean something, engender in you some value rather than have it taken away. Watch for who you let into your life though I know how hard that can be. Trust is difficult and some reservation is always a good thing. At the first signs of you being treated like a second class citizen then go. I hung on and believed waaaay too long in some people. I still fuck up in this regard. Be with people who will respect you.
The broken tooth thing is cute. I totally love that. And those girls were bitches. Whoever set the stereotype that girls are nice, benevolent, harmless and vulverbale needs a nice punch to the face. Screw them. There’s nothing wrong with your pants. They’re just a bunch of low lives. You can make friends that’ll appreciate you. You seem like a really nice person =) and you don’t have to fit in. You don’t have to anything. No one decides what you have to be but you. And hey, maybe if you start smiling, people would approach you more =) Screw the people that make fun of your teeth. Your teeth are cute. Not all people are that shallow.
Pretty girls make graves,bro:) I dont really believe that is the rule with pretty girls,actually,but in the case of this specific breed of pretty girls you mentioned IT IS. Fuck them and their good jeans..they were cruel and stupid…sheep,except real sheep deserve actual respect and regard and the gutless morons who were compelled to wear their conformity and class status on their asses and alienate those who could not ,deserve no respect nor regard.Fuck them . Fuck them for the way they were then,and fuck those who fail to show kindness and decency here and now. You see,my friend….this world is pretty darn horrible and depraved,and “society” as you know it is a false front existence whereby humans attempt to feel good about themselves by comparing what they have and what they do ,to others…those with less and with misfortune to be born into poverty elevate these fuckers and make them feel good..those with more and with good birthright financially create jealousy and discontent in these same morons,and a greedy striving to get more and live bigger …for what? THe super rich only want to double,triple,quadruple their fortune,when theyve got enough for thousands,sometimes millions of people.And so they hoard,and those without starve and suffer and die. Fuck this society. Its WRONG. This society worships money..money is God in case you didn’t know.Its UGLY. I suggest(,and I always suggest this,and I shall be taking my own suggestion asap,) that you find a way to live differently.Find a place that doesn’t value this kind of societal system. One that values people for other qualities besides money,portable property, perfect teeth. IF you’re a woman, you could possibly be valued for something other than : ability to support a venti Pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks vertically on each ass cheek like its a fucking shelf, while getting a degree,a career AND a slamming body complete with gorgeous long porno hair…… Leave there and go to a place thats isolated enough to be a lot simpler. Honest work,honest pay, company with others who dont care to live in a populated culture of shallow human toy poodles. This means that you will be in the company of fringe folk. Some outlaws. Alaska,for instance.But theres plenty of places left in this world to drop out to…north or south. Im going as soon as my commitments are met. I may go to check out communes,of which there are many all over the world-look em up. Then, kill your disease-The disease of Comparison I mentioned earlier,because youve got it.We nearly all have it,and it torments us and it arms us with sharp self loathing and it pools up into infinite lakes of misery and self pity that we will drown ourselves in. KILL THIS DISEASE. Or as near as you can come to it-i suspect it is always within us unless we achieve or attain some sort of enlightenment or spiritually creaminess-but I think its possible to stop hating oneself for what others did to us or failed to see in us or failed to do to or for us. Im highly codependant,and it’s hurt me my entire life.Deeply.But im going to try… You have just as much right and chance to be with somebody as anyone born onto this earth has. Missing tooth and all. If you cannot find a desire to live, then I am sorry it hurt so fucking bad here..you didnt deserve to be trampled and then ignored..you were worthy of love,you ARE worthy of love…one more thing:if and when I check out,I plan on making a huge statement about how fucked up and wrong factory farming is-that is one of the many unbearably despicable things that humans do to animals-and Im prob going to fuck some factory farms up catastrophically,because it is a criminally heinous act carried on nonstop and society allows it,and my point is:consider how you might possibly use your disgust of a cruel and depraved society to make a big ass statement concerning what upset or hurt you the most…just something to consider:)