Sigh. I get better then when I fall it’s worse than the previous worse of before if that makes any sense at all. My life is declining at a rapid rate, and I’m losing grip on myself, I know I’m going to slip very soon. My whole life, I’ve been helping other people, basically living for other people and that’s basically made me crack until now where I’ve crumbled. People expect me to be a certain way, shape me a way I can’t be shaped, and make me something I don’t want to be. I’m suppose to be perfection in an imperfect world and boy […]
Tag:
Whole Life
Just want to say to all who is in hard time at the moment, STAY STRONG, you were born to make a diference in this world.
You are just so much better than those people or things that upset you, who ignoring you, who or what makes you scared… There are people who love you and who DO care for you, they may be near, or you’ll meet them later in your life (you sure will), and they need you. Think about them. Do not be selfish. You are wonderful, beautiful and this world needs you!
Believe in yourself! I DO!
Read some books, look for answers, talk to somebody, look in to yourself, try […]
Someone I’ve loved since the moment I’ve ever talked to them is slipping away. The sad part is I’m letting him. I can’t do anything about him not loving me anymore. I’ve fought for him for 9 months, if not more. I’m done. I can’t keep waiting on him to realize if I’m what he wants or not. I haven’t talked to him since Thursday. He says he cares and would do anything for me but I just don’t know anymore. I don’t know if it was love or lust. Maybe neither Maybe all of it was just a big joke, but I just can’t take it anymore. The […]
I DON’T WANT TO LET YOU WIN! I REALLY DON’T! .. but its the hardest thing I’ve ever had to face and it hurts so so bad. I want to fight but only for so long. I want to be better, I don’t want to feel like this anymore. Why can’t it just stop. If there are miracles then why can’t I be blessed with one. I fucking deserve it. Why can’t I just go to the store and end up with my soul mate. Why am I so alone? I don’t know if I’m strong enough anymore. There is still something there though, this little tiny […]
Me?
I am a 14 year old girl in the verge of giving up her whole life away. I don’t seem to sound like Amanda Todd or any other teenage obsessed love seeking little *****. But there’s nothing left in my life I can hold on to. Everything around me feels so bland. I don’t tend to have reasons for what I do. There is not purpose left for me. I am tired, and lonely.
I am a child abuse case, ever since I was 9 year old my parents started abusing me. Beating me up to shreds, channel their frustration in me. I lost my […]
Is it bad to say that you would rather be dead than to be without the love of your life your whole life?
I don’t think I’m going to be with the love of my life forever I just can’t handle thinking that cause I love her with all my heart
My whole life I’ve been told that I was smart. Smart enough to do anything I wanted. I would be the one in the family to go the furthest and make everyone proud. Well, here I am, about to fail my first class in grad school. There’s no way out of it now, save death. The final is Monday, and I know nothing. Every time I try to study I look blankly at the slides for about a half hour, then cry for an hour, then I’m so exhausted all I want to do is take a shower and go to sleep. Everywhere I turn […]
I just can’t take my family anymore… I am tired of being treated like shit and everything else. It feels like I don’t belong anymore. Most people don’t understand what I am going through and say that I’m complaining. If you lived my life, you would sound like me, too. My sister is 14 and beats on me whenever I don’t do what she says when I am the older sister and says shit to me that she knows will hurt me. I may be older, but I have really bad depression, so I really can’t help it. I wish that I could. And then […]
I’ve been really thinking about everything that’s happened to be and what might happen to me lately I kinda just want to get everything that’s happened to me out there. I’ve never actually told anyone my whole life story before. I don’t expect this to get me any comments or any views for that matter, I just want to get if off my chest. It kinda explains why I am who I am. Well, I guess I’ll start from the beginning:
When I was 2 months old my mom found out my dad was on some serious drugs. He actually dealt drugs. Every kind you could think of, he had. As soon as […]
Where to start . Im sad . Unless your lucky , in my terms lucky being having the perfect life set up for you via wonderful (wealthy) parents or extreme good choices , then life is literally depressing . When someone asks why do you want to die ? my response would be , why not ? It sucks to have no one to talk to who understands . It sucks to be so alone all the time . I dont know what happened . There was a point in my life when i was so happy . So unbeleivably happy . That’s gone now […]
Mitch Lucker’s death really hit me hard. I cried over his death like I should have a family members’. Â A lot of people say how can a band change your life, before one did…I thought the same. But when a band or maybe just a single song changes your life…you just know. Suicide Silence and Mitch Lucker in general are one of the bands that made me who I am. Changed my life really.
RIP Mitch we will miss you. You changed my life and so many others, thank you <3
How can we know that we are loved? Kisses. I’ve never been kissed in my whole life. Yeah, I’m ashamed because of that. Come on, I’m a teenager and that means, to me, that I’ve never been loved, not even a child love. Well, when I was a seven or eight year old girl, a friend kissed me. Have you ever seen those kisses between children? Was something like that. He acted like a ************ with me the rest of my childhood, telling me that I was ugly and fat constantly. God, I hate the bastard. Anyway, that was my first kiss. I don’t know why that […]
I know I’ve been such a bad daughter. My mother is not perfect, my father neither. My mother can’t accept other ideas, and my father is too irresponsible. But, with all the bad things they do, I have no right to do this. Drugs, promiscuity, this is just wrong! My parents have done a lot of good things for me in my whole life, they’re really good persons (most of the time) and this is the worst way to pay them back. I’m so stupid. I hate myself so much.
While searching “how to kill yourself” I came upon this site. I debated over the fact on wether I should join. Then I did … Well to begin I would like to explain why I was searching that in the first place. Idk I’m just Tired of my whole life completely . This is my first post. And well yeah my life pretty much sucks , I’m getting devoured by depression and anxiety..I hate myself I’m a piece of shit seriously .. if I post later on you’ll get to know why. ..
All my life I have put my friends before myself. All my life I have asked how they were doing. How they’re holding up. If they’re okay. If they need anyone to talk to. To have a shoulder to cry on. A rock to keep them in place. Someone to come to when they don’t know what to do or what to say. I have always been there. No matter what, I have always been there. I don’t judge, I don’t talk until everything they have to let out is said, I don’t even tell them what’s going on i my life because at those […]
My name is Nick mills. I am 18 going on 19 in march. For my whole life the only person who has cared about me is my father. My mother doesnt care, my siblings resent me, for no real reason, other than that i just don’t belong or have ruined their lives somehow by being birthed into this god forsaken world. Constitantly seeking approval, because no one has ever approved of anything i have done. I am currently on my 5th year of high school, alternative ed starting at the end of last year at Lincoln High School owosso michigan, (track me down and murder […]
I think the scariest thing about death is what comes after. It’s like your life continues even when you’re not there, at least that’s what I think. But the thing is, is that I don’t want it to continue. I just want it to be nothing. Nothing but blackness. Or nothing but light. Just peace. But sometimes I do hope that my life continues up in heaven or wherever I’m going to end up, because sometimes I don’t want to leave what’s behind.
In all honesty though, I’m terrified of dying.
Maybe I need to live in hell on earth before I can ascend into heaven? I feel as though my life on earth is just a plain hell. I walk, aimlessly, seeking some type of purpose. It never seems to be attainable.
I think out of my whole life, i was only happy for a year. After that, I never found that kind of joy again or magic so to speak. I know compared to others, I should be grateful for what I do have. I just cannot seem to be uplifted.
I look at myself and just feel disgust. Maybe my life is an evil joke […]
Listen to me.
I know what it’s like having to go to school, and dreading it, just to get bullied every day. I have ADD and slight dyslexia (but you would never know it unless I told you), so I went to “special” classes because I learned differently. I got picked on, constantly, until I finally beat the shit out of the kid for doing it (but I don’t recommend this), and after that, nobody fucked with me. I know what it’s like. I was afraid to go to school. I used to beg my mum to let me stay home, and my grandfather told me […]
Hi, i’m 15, I’m a girl, and I’ve been through hell. I’m a sophomore, and I know what its like to lose everyone you’ve ever had. My mom had me at 16, and starting at three years old, my mom was dating around a lot, got hip on drugs and alcohol. Both of my parents were VERY bad alcoholics. My mom was dating this guy that beat her, and made me watch, then my sister was born, I was three, taking care of a baby my mom couldn’t take care of.. We got evicted and lived in a car for a week when i was […]