Nothings seems to be okay anymore I’m tired of trying to make everyone happy I wish it was easy to be what everyone expects but I don’t know how to try anymore. There’s to much to understand to much to wish went right. How can I smile when all I do is lose every fight.
it’s funny how i’m just a natural listener and talker. so many people are just one or the other, but i need to listen to other people so they can get their feelings and problems out and also talk about my own problems and just about dumb shit that is important to me. i wish i could just pick a side, but i can’t. i listened as my roommate talked to me about her concerns about her academics and her friends back home which I thought was nice. i tried to be as responsive as possible so that it would seem more like a conversation, […]
I’m a 15 year old female and I can’t do this anymore. I’ve destroyed everyone’s life. I’ve bullied others and I’ve done selfish and terrible things. I hate who I am. I don’t wish to live on this earth any longer. My family has been torn apart recently and I can’t take anymore of who I am or the twisted ness of where I came from. I’m going to kill myself. I feel like there is nothing left.
I just want to wish all SP folks a happy thanks giving
and I like to stress the HAPPY. Enjoy the day and time you might
have to spend with others.
Peace and love and good times for all of us!!
I keep getting these constant fears that im going to end up all alone and it seems like it might be true.in 10 years will my parents even be alive and were will I be if there not here to take care of me.im going completely insane cause Ive never worked.i don’t do college . I’ve never been in a relationship nor is anyone even remotely interested in me.no kids.im disabled I want to die but am a coward who cant find the strength to jump off a bridge and the only other thing ive ever tried is overdose . everyone says im doing well […]
i felt hate towards everything. then i got mad at God. now i am just sad. I wont slip into despair this time. i just really wish i could cry. i have not shed a tear in years. i have wept with joy. i remember feeling that happy. i feel the urge, but tears wont come. meh…..
This will be my third story on here. And probably my last. I’m done. I typed up my note on my computer and I have my pills with some water. I am going to do it tonight or tomorrow night. I’m sorry if you tried to help me. It’s almost funny. I walk down my hallway and see pictures of me when I was younger. You wouldn’t even imagine I would become this. This monster that cuts himself and cries everyday just because he is different. Someone who can only find closure in death. I really wish it didn’t have to be this way. I just can’t see a […]
it hurts to have a roommate who thinks that people are weak for getting help for their mental problems. i have tried and failed on that front, but there are so many people who need it to survive and function normally. i also suspect that her opinions are heavily based in her masking her own mental health issues, which to me are very apparent (i want to say she exhibits signs of either borderline personality or bipolar). yesterday when she came back she told me that she “made a friend,” whatever the fuck that means. she made a friend, nonetheless, and this friend apparently attempted […]
And so it began.. The day you were born.. Reality is everyday we die a little, but for some they want to live an eternity, while most wish the hell they were given would end tomorrow…
I have often wondered why I wanted to just end it. And I usually end up with the fact that I am lost and my life has no direction. But now, I realized, there’s something more than that.
I realized that I am the complete opposite of myself before (when I was driven, confident, ambitious). Now I am very insecure, confused and just flat-out tired and unmotivated. What makes me want to end it is I could have AVOIDED IT. I USED to be on the other side, the side of optimism, of hope in the future. When I started college, I was among intelligent people, […]
I dont know any of you guys, nor do I know your story/history. I know pain in life has brought us all here.I want everyone of you guys to know I love you and hope that peace love and happiness finds a way in your hearts and minds. We all here seem to be sick, hurt, lonely crippled goods.life has a way of beating the shyt out you.Just know whatever you ve done, whatever you do ,know that I really do care.Im sorry you guys are hurting I really wish it was some way that this was a place of peace amd love for everyone.since […]
i have none… no friends… not a single one that i can talk to or go hang out with regularly… my friends that i use to have dont speak to me anymore… 4 of them are dead… 2 died by suicide. 1 by heart failure. and 1 by motorcycle accident… im all alone… ive never really been a social person… i dont know how to make friends. im out of school and living with my careless bf and his family… im 18 years worth of nothingness… almost 19… *sigh* i fucking hate everybody i know… i wish to know someone else…
Hey, I dunno how things are for you but if you never see this then congrats! :p Hopefully because things ended up being a lot better than you would have imagined. I was honestly stunned the last day we messaged each other. I really wish that I could have helped you a lot more. To be able to do what you did for me. But then again I guess someone else was doing it. If you ever messaged me on kik, I probably never got it. I wipe my phone often. Sorry for not being there for you if you needed me. We lost contact […]
Happiness. A word. I feel it at times, I feel a lack of it at others. I’m not always sure which one defines the word. I have been feeling as though happiness is making me feel empty lately. Maybe this isn’t happiness then. But why do I long for the hopelessness I fought so hard to escape from? Perhaps I never truly escaped. Perhaps this is just a masquerade of emotions to trick myself into living to fight another day.
Do I know who I am? Does anyone? Am I anyone? These are real questions for me. I have four distinct versions of myself. Family, girlfriend, […]
I found a way out. Haha I found my method… I want to get out. Haha… but I’m unsure of if it’s what I want… I mean it is, in every sense it’s always on my mind; suicide. I can’t pretend I have no one that would care… there are plenty… I suppose I’m just worried about what they will do…I know some are as unstable as i am.. and I’d never wish them to harm themselves….
Most days, I feel like giving up… I have pets I live for now, nothing else. I sit at work and wish no one would look or talk to me. Most of the time a nasty comment comes from my mouth to lash out, it is all I have left. I am tired of the stares. I have been trying to place my pets, I made a will and am preparing to commit suicide. I don’t know when just yet. I am writing letters to friends and family. And even one to my employer who was the the most cause of my depression and stress. […]
i hate myself so goddamn much and i just want to take all the pills in my fucking cabinet. everybodys going to end up hating me and leaving me like they always do. there’s no point in me even living anymore and no point of me trying so hard not to relapse with the cutting and stuff… it hurts so bad to fell this way and to sit here and cry and hurt while everybody else is so happy. i hate that anybody has to feel the way that i feel but i deserve it…. i need to die…. i want someone to kill me… […]
I went to a psychiatric testing place last week, and I’ve got to go back again Monday. I’ve noticed that I express far fewer symptoms of depression than I had years ago. For instance, I don’t actively want to commit suicide, but I still wish to stop existing. I sleep whenever I can, because there is nothing to do at all that means anything. I don’t want a job because there is no point, and I’m currently mentally incapable of having one, as I break down about a couple of weeks in, realising how pointless and worthless I am and that my job suggests the […]
I have a bad habit of not taking my meds. Only two of them are important, one stops the seizures and the other helps me from attempting at my life. Even when i’m on my meds i still wish to die but off of them,hell i can only say it’s hard to resist killing myself. My boyfriend would be completely ruined and so would my family. That’s the only reason to be honest, i except the thought of death. I’ve been told that i’m selfish and complain a lot but if people knew the crippling pain i was in they would shut the fuck up. […]
Even my dog is partying hard tonight! Hope everyone had a great night 🙂
(yeah I know most didn’t but hey I can wish for it anyways)