After 2 months I thought I got rid of the awful virus that is eating me alive but I shaved my pubic area and the warts came back with a vengance. I’m in constant pain. All I want to do is sleep to escape. In my dreams I am normal again; the girl in my dreams was not date raped by a scum bag, her innocence and her healthy body are intact. But when I wake up I am diseased, damaged goods. It doesn’t matter how attractive and fit I am because I am a disease carrier. I am destined to be alone for the rest of my life. I never got to be in love or have a normal relationship with someone. I never got to experience making love where two bodies intertwine to merge two souls for an instant. I will never feel physical closeness or intimacy. I am instead labeled a whore, a slut, dirty, diseased. All because I gave an intoxicated friend a ride home and he pinned me down and took what he wanted from me. Because of him, I live in pain and shame. I want to give up. Life seems pointless. Nothing seems possible anymore.
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Im sorry to hear what you went through. Im not gonna be a hypocrite and say stuff like “Hang in there” or “You’ll get through it” because I cant imagine what your going through. Its a shame people like us live so far away from each other.
Honey..you are not missing much..guys are scum..at least all the ones ive met. I wanted a fairy tale life and never got it. I wish you happiness through your heart because God knows you didn’t deserve what happened to you. Just always remember there are people out there that have it worse than you and focus on the good things in life. Love what is infront of you because one day it or they wont be there and live with no regrets. If you punish yourself for something someone else did because you feel your not good enough then life can be hard. Thank you for posting because talking about this helps me as well.. 🙂
Its not you fault.you were dealt a shitty hand.im embarrassed to say i dont know anything about warts can they be treated?
hello violet…..go see a gyno….will treat with friar’s balsam or cryosurgery.(freezing)…the virus remains even after the outward symptoms seem to clear….for some people this can take up to 3 to 4 months ….and for some it really lingers….go to your local natural health food store and ask them about anti-virals such as olive leaf extract…..will help finally kill the virus…..the fact that they’re back tells me that you are severely stressed on physical, mental, emotional and spiritual levels…tranqz will do the trick…but not my first choice…..a sexual assault counsellor would be best….the others don’t get it imo….most sa counsellors are survivors themselves….they saved my sorry life for sure….when everyone else had given up….they just couldn’t understand….but the sexual assault team they could….the counsellor’s can help you with meditation and relaxation therapies that will work just as well or better….just not as quickly….if you’re in crisis…..i would suggest the tranqs….you need to re-ground….someone has knocked you loose from your mooring….everything has changed…because your perspective has changed….you will need help to find your way….and you will be your greatest ally in the fight for you…i can’t stress enough….get help…..but get outside into nature as much as possible….grow something….create something….but get help…..
i speak from the opposite end of the spectrum…..and continued to be a victim for over 30 years….what i would give to go back and have done something different….sorry….more coulda, shoulda,woulda……but if i were you …i woulda
Namaste
I had warts myself, got them from a jerk..
They will disappear by themselves after a while, but you can treat them so the pain goes away. As Namaste said, go see a gyno or a doctor. He or she can prescribe medication for you. Useally it’s a fluid you lubricate on the warts two times a day, for three days. Then a break for four days and then repeat till they are gone. It stings like hell, but when it goes away you feel so much better. I too felt awfully dirty and trashy after I found out I got them, but they are easy to get rid of. Just be patient 🙂
And you are no whore, slut and neither dirty. Jealous bitches talk shit cuz you are much more prettier then they are. Or you have something they want. That’s why girls talk shit, including myself from time to time. Some girls are just better then me, and I envy them. Either for money, looks or the way life treats them. Now I’ve learned to be happy with what I got instead 🙂 So them bitches can envy me! 🙂
Good luck on your little problem. And by the way; you have noooo idea how many gets STD’s! It’s more common then the flu! 🙂
I just found out today that i have them as well…. i either got it from a guy who took advantage of me or from one i trusted with my life. either way its awful. and i am feeling exactly the way you are. exactly … my doctor told me tho that in young patients theres a chance it will go away.. and she said you can sstill live a healthy regular lifestyle and get married and have kids…. but that probably doesnt make you feel better. i bawled even after she said all those things. but at least know your not alone.