I found the truth

My head keeps on
I wonder if it could ever be turned off
“I must be dreaming”, I tell myself
So many times, and I’ve found out the truth
Nothing more… nothing else
Is it just me? Is it my fault?
Do I live in a different world?
No? And so why I feel that way?
Give me answers please
‘Cause I have no escape
I have no one in fact
Not even my cat wants me to scratch him in the back
And you still wonder why…
Did you notice those cuts in my arms?
Or that I am by myself most of the time
Or just the look in my eyes…
NO you didn’t… and you still wonder why
Not blaming you though, its my fault
I know, but don’t pretend to care now
Don’t try to get me some help
Fuck yourselve, stay out…
A black hole it’s consuming my soul
On the outside I tell you what you want to hear
My mind still wants me to fall
Between anger, sadness and fear
Am about to step up for me
The right desicion I believe it’ll be
I’m not scared now… I found the truth…
I was not supposed to live