there is no point in me

I know no one cares and no one wants to read this, but I want to tell the truth about myself.  I am a complete joke, I am desperately in love with someone, they mean the world to me, I would happily die for them, but I will never get to be with them, even if I only see a glimpse of their face, it has made my whole week, I would do anything just to say hello and for them to acknowledge me. Because I know I will never be with them, I have made it the sole purpose of my life to make extraordinary achievements,  so that maybe one day they will find out and say well done, It would mean the world to me if they were proud of me, because that is the best I could ever hope for. But I am useless and pathetic, I cant do anything, I know this sounds arrogant, but I try so so hard, and work my self ragged, I work so much harder than everyone else, I know I do, but I dont get anywhere. I don’t want to live any more. In a way my life ended when I met this person, they are my one and only thought, and they dont even notice I exist. I dont go out with any friends, ever, I have no life, academically I have done well, but im so miserable I can no longer motivate myself. I want to die, I cant live like this any more.