Boring.

I’m not ugly, I’m not pretty. I’m just me. Depressed, lonely, boring me. I have a story, my story, to tell. I don’t believe in other people committing suicide, but i feel I should. I have so many reasons against me. I have had help, asked for it, it was given but nothing works. I’m still me here waiting, watching, wanting to die, but something keeps me from actually doing it. I want to so badly I cry because I cant even do that. Some days I eat everything, some days I don’t eat at all. I fail at school and suck at life. A ll I really want it to be happy, living, breathing. And for once to not feel like in drowning in a sea of my own self pity. Depression feels like I’m drowning, but everyone else is living and breathing. No one knows how I really feel about life and I couldn’t even care less. This is my first post and I feel better knowing people will read my boring stuff but feel touched knowing they are not alone. Its hard to see that you’re not alone in this when it really feel like it.