but i guess it makes my problems less important
every few days i find the idea of a drug addict life more and more attractive
maybe the short lived thrill seems better than no thrill at all
i want to be in partial control. experience “happiness” and do it over again
then when i get tired of it, do my big finale
sounds stupid but thats what i want. i gave up on wanting the better things. odds are slim and get slimmer every day
i cant explain it. i dont want anything. i want to die
3 comments
I feel very close to the way you describe. I can understand your point fully. I have never been a drug user. I never liked them. But Im getting older and the quality of my life is getting worser so if something doesn’t change in the 6 months or so I am thinking of doing pretty much what you say. Enjoy a few highs…. the do my finale with an overdose to end it. I just dont see myself living past another couple years at most.
I feel like you… But I have become such an outcast and a recluse that I wouldn’t know where to find stuff. I can’t go out and ask people in the street. 🙁 So I sniff turpentine for the moment. 🙁 I knew somebody who had stuff, but he died of cancer…
Be careful about turpentine you will rot your brain out with that stuff