So I just found this website o whatever today and I guess I thought it would be a good way to right the things I can’t say out loud to anyone even though I know no one will probably read this. I’ve been depressed for the last 5 years and I finally decided to see a psychologist about it since my self harm problem has started up again and my suicidal thoughts have been getting stronger. The only problem is my mom, I can’t tell her why i want to see a psychologist because she’d freak and never let me leave the house alone ever again, so I told her it’s because i’ll cold to people and I want to fix it( not complete BS but still not the main reason I want to go). I’m sick of crying every night, having sudden attacks and not being able to sleep well at night. I want to fix whatever it is I have since i’m not even sure it’s depression, it could just as well be something else. The point is that whatever it is has started to worsen and it’s causing problems in a recent relationship i started so I want the voices in my head gone for good. I’m pretty sure someone else has gone through something similar so I would really appreciate advise on how to get better.
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“I want the voices in my head gone for good.”
You are on the right track. And I can relate.
Seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist is useful if you are looking to improve your mental health. In my (somewhat limited) experience with them CBT (Cognitive behavioral therapy) plays an enormous part but it doesn’t really help with complex underlying problems. As far as self harm goes I really know very little.
With regards to your mother you’re doing the right thing by not telling her, if you feel that you cannot tell her or are not ready to tell her. However I wouldn’t recommend lying about the real reason. Perhaps simply tell her that you aren’t ready to explain things to her because you don’t actually know what is ‘wrong’.
Tell her that if and when you are able to talk to her about things in more detail you will but until you are ready you would like her to not press the issue. Acknowledge that there is something wrong in your life and that you are trying to fix things.
If you want to talk more I’d be happy to, just reply to this post and we can take it from there. Also, don’t think that people aren’t reading this or that nobody cares.
Thank you for replying. It feels good to talk about this with someone. I’ve been quiet for too long about how much I hurt. The reason I lied to my mother is because if I told her I had something wrong she would say it’s all in my head. I would like to talk some more if you have time.
No problem at all, feel free to drop me an Email anytime. I’ll try my best to reply promptly.
arealist@gmx.co.uk