I have always tried to mean something to someone, but in the end I end up meaning nothing to everyone. I started to notice that I’m like the “backup” friend. The one who is always ignored except when someone needs a favor. The one who doesn’t exist except when someone needs help. The worst part is that I do it expecting something more than a simple “thank you”.
It’s not the first time I’ve felt like this, but I can’t get over it. When I help someone, I exist for somebody for just a few moments. I guess that’s why I keep doing it. But it’s killing me inside little by little. I just want someone to be there for me when I really need it. I just want someone who can say “I love you. Thank you so much for your help. You’re a great person” and really mean it, not just say it like simple words. I just want to ignore these dark thoughts, but they seem to be eternally stuck in my mind.
I want to be really cared for, not just used over and over again and then thrown away like I was nothing. I want a true friend…
29 comments
a chain for a chain, howdy, hanging in there. Monkey chain, monkey ball. I don’t think Hitmonlee can beat a Primeape. Primeape versus Machoke, Machoke was too slow, and lost. Primeape was the champion, is.
Maybe you’re like a Magneton, that would be a little awkward to approach.
Welcome to “La Fin.” Here, in cyberspace.
i completely empathize with your sentiment, although I have about 2 people I intimately talk to, something still feels rather unfulfilled in terms of relationships. (platonic or not) although we are completely compatible in mindsets and personalities, there just isn’t the physical intimacy I crave nor physical compatibility. I’ve found all of these relationships online actually, there is such a huge congregation of people which is incredibly diverse, if you keep your eyes open and extend your reach there is a good chance you could meet someone that satisfies your needs. true friends seem harder to acquire in real life I would like to say, as the initial anonymity of online friendships allow for more honesty and if issues are present and you realize you are not compatible you can simply stop talking instead of turning them down physically which is typically unettiquite. maybe you could hang around here, all of my relationships (of any variation) have stemmed from SP, I’ve found most users easy to empathize with and most seem good intentioned and nice because of that mutual understanding of depression etc. there are also a lot of bat shit crazy people on here so watch out
if you’d like we could totally talk, I’ve read all of your posts and you seem very well spoken and capable of critical thinking. your insights of yourself are not something everyone can do, the issues that bring people to sites like this are convoluted and many are unable to delve into the cores of their issues to define and subsequently begin to resolve them. I’m around your age too, about a year older so I completely understand where you’re coming from, it’s rough lol, comment back if you wish to speak (which is totally fine if you don’t) and we can get in touch. I do nothing all day so I’m always available to talk if you need it and would be happy to listen 🙂
Yeah, I’d really love to. The only problem here is that I don’t come very often here, as you may have noticed from my posts’ dates. But it would be very nice to talk to someone who, I believe, is going through the same stuff I am, and not any other person who thinks he or she “understands” what I’m feeling.
hi, dear friend…
am also one of the person like u only…
people uses every1 just as things and its hard to be with them..
do not worry, everything has an end, and am sure u wil get the best person in ur life..
my email is greyshadedarea at Hotmail dot com, we can email each other if you want and move on to instant messaging if you prefer, I hope to hear from you, no pressure though 🙂
my email is greyshadedarea at Hotmail dot com, we can email each other if you want and move on to instant messaging if you prefer, I hope to hear from you, no pressure though 🙂
ugh so sorry about these double posts
if you’d like we could totally talk, I’ve read all of your posts and you seem very well spoken and capable of critical thinking. your insights of yourself are not something everyone can do, the issues that bring people to sites like this are convoluted and many are unable to delve into the cores of their issues to define and subsequently begin to resolve them. I’m around your age too, about a year older so I completely understand where you’re coming from, it’s rough lol, comment back if you wish to speak (which is totally fine if you don’t) and we can get in touch. I do nothing all day so I’m always available to talk if you need it and would be happy to listen 🙂
Hey stendarr, you check out becoming a gaming designer. Keep Pokémon alive, for reals.
ugh I posted that twice sorry
Stendarr
@morlock
if I invented a video game the graphics would be as bad as Morrowind’s
you should* check out. fwk
and the story line shittier than a Call of Duty game jk
Could be fun. =b
Haha, I never played call of duty. Sorry for lag………. im out
Too stricken to speak, would be the description. I need to heal on a holy pilgrimage banner, peace. I want to be here for Christmas . . .
na but, I was thinking of a more, simple design. Board game style, the best example of that genre in online gaming that I know of is the game “Dofus,” and “Wakfu.” It was at top of it’s kind 5 years ago but both games died out and …… the new versions kept getting crappier.
I never played wakfu though, just dofus. It was a fun game..
elder scrolls bra! alright, peace out.
sorry I never ask what pokemon do you use. farewell, the purple Ash.
You guys have no sense of reality of successfull game genre these days, no offence but pokemon is lost like the ring in the lord of the rings. 😉
@lovinglife
Pokemon is actually the pinnacle of handheld video game achievement, I don’t know what fucked with your senses to distort your perception of reality :O
@LL
you’re probably jealous that you weren’t the best that no one ever was, it’s okay, you have my sympathy but I can’t empathize 😛
(nah it’s cool, I do feel bad for you though, Pokemon is the shit)
“you’re probably jealous that you weren’t the best that no one ever was”
And what the fuck does this mean, please elaborate?
God I´m starting to really dislike you @stendarr, no offence. Yesterday a person came here and told he had a cancer and asked help for painless suicide methods and your comment was: â€go watch the world cup”. Damn, you sure have discretion and compassion for people – feels like you hold yourself pretty high above anyone else. Could have even told you felt sorry for the guy or just kept your mouth shut.
But nah…It´s all about you….
I am like you too, The RoadSoFar. I am a “disposable commodity”. If anything, occasionally people are worried because they know I feel suicidal so they want to know how I am doing, but in reality they are not really interested. So I won’t let them unwrap me anymore. I will just stay put in my wrap…